Blog of the Dark Lord

Hillary v. Obama

2008-01-14T10:45:00.000-05:00

I'm getting really tired of this fight between Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, and the war of words being waged by their supporters on forums and boards. Most recently, there was the MLK remarks controversy. I know both of these guys want to win, of course, but they need to be careful, lest they endanger their chances in the general election. Someone's going to come out of this fight on top, and they have to do so intact enough to be able to get a majoroity of votes in November. Both Obama and Clinton need to keep in mind the possibility that they won't be the one that's chosen, and that they'd prefer their fellow party member as President than a Republican.

I started out as a Hillary supporter. But her campaign is pushing me towards Obama. I see the ignorance in posts on boards and forums, and more and more I see how he's right about the type of change that's needed.
A few facts:
1. Obama is not Muslim, has never practiced Islam and has always been Christian. Period. Anyone saying otherwise is lying.
2. Obama has put forward a health care plan and an economic plan as well as other policy plans. They're on his website and detailed. Anyone telling you he's just given speeches with no policy is lying.
3. I have not, at any time, seen Obama bring up race. Not once. Hillary brings up the fact that she's a woman every time her poll numbers slump.

Don't get me wrong, despite her shoddy campaigning, I still wouldn't mind Hill as prez. I look back very fondly on the Clinton years. It was a wonderful time in American history. The Bush years have been the darkest chapter in our nation's history that I've had the displeasure of living through. With Hillary, we'd get Bill again...plus she's strong on her own. She'd be great in office, and so would Obama.
In truth, if either of these two become president, we'll be doing pretty darn good. That's the truth. I hope whichever one wins they make the other a major player in their administration. Let's quit the played up devisiveness. Come November 8, if the Hillary supporters see Obama's name across from, say Romney's, do you think they're actually going to NOT vote for Obama? If Obama supporters see Hillary's name across from Thompson, do you really think they're going to NOT vote for Hillary?We've been blessed with two candidates who really, honestly, ain't that far apart on objectives for the country. Let's focus on their policy, both of which make those policies available on their websites, and quit the petty infighting. If we have EITHER of them as President, supporters from both camps will be cheering in the street come November. And after the primaries are over, they'll suddenly be on the same side. And so will their supporters.
Hillary OR Obama in 08 may not be an exciting, decisive slogan, but I think the majority of Clinton and Obama supporters feel that way at heart.

Cloverfield update w/ possible spoilers

2007-12-13T14:58:00.000-05:00

Okay, been awhile since I talked about this and the movie comes out next month.
This post is loaded with potential spoilers, so be warned.Apparently, from the viral sites being run across the net, the Cloverfield Monster is completely original. It is a whale hybrid and may have a connection to "extremeophile" lifeforms that have been found living in extreme conditions on the bottom of the ocean floor.
The monster has been awakened by Tagruato, the parent company of Slusho. This likely happened at a site called the Chuai Station, located off the east coast in the atlantic. they were digging for something called "sea nectar" along with petroleum products. if you go to the interactive map, you'll notice that there's no E.U.R.R. for Chuai Station. Also, at other little hidden websites across the net, like one from a faux environmental group called T.I.D.O., you'll see little posts from people who have relatives on Chuai station that they can't contact. There's also a string of videos allegedly from a girl who's dating a guy from TIDO. She gets a package from him, thinking its a xmas gift. In it is evidence against Tagruato, but she doesn't understand. He warns of them having awakened something at Chuai Station. He also sent her a package that warns that it needs to be kept frozen. She tosses it to the side.
Now, here's the big reveal....I can't guarantee this, but I believe it to be authentic.
Here is the Cloverfield Monster!

Now, as we can see, it's a whale mutation. It also has monster louse that ride it, like on real whales. It's collosal, perhaps larger than Godzilla. If it's a deep-sea extremophile used to extreme pressure AND can surface without problems, then it's skin would have to be super tough, probably impervious to even small artillery at that size.
The louse are parasitical, and a separate species. If they bite you, it'd be very nasty, as they probably have some horrendous toxins and may even implant eggs.
You can see the horrible effects of being bitten by one here. Yikes.

We're still not sure why it's called Cloverfield, esp. since everyone was told that was just a working title. They could still change it later I supposed. Also, the monster leak could be meant to divert away from the real thing. I hope not. I think that monster looks freakin' awesome and is going to be horrific on the big screen, esp. when all you'll get are glimpses through hand-held cameras. But the louse are going to be the real horror.
The fact that this thing attacks after the drilling and some hints here and there, give the possibility that it is semi-intelligent. But that fits in with many, many people's beliefs of whale intelligence. And the first rule of monster sci-fi is "take a natural trait and run it to the extreme". This may be why Abrahms chose a whale mutant, so that it having uncanny intellect (if not true intelligence) is believable.
Scary-looking stuff. He wants this to be America's godzilla, but even less friendly and more frightening. I think, if that translates well to screen, he might succeed.

Can we put the 9/11 conspiracy to bed now?

2007-11-29T17:13:00.000-05:00

I've occasionally encountered people who, for reasons I haven't really figured out yet, are convinced that there's some vast conspiracy behind the 9/11 attacks.
Today, Osama bin Laden ended all doubt. In his most recently-released tape, he took sole and full responsibility for the 9/11 attacks.
Sole responsibility.
Sole.
Responsibility.
He also took responsibility right after the attacks, but some people didn't listen. Then he released the actual tapes the hijackers made before the attacks declaring what they were going to do. But some people didn't listen.
I've heard people claim no plane hit the Pentagon. Well, I was working at Crystal City at the time and I saw it go in. Another reporter I know was blown back off the lawn by the impact as it went over head. So, a plane hit the pentagon. And it was a jetliner.
And I'm not honest when I say I don't know why people believe in the conspiracy theories. I know why. Bush.
All that's happened since seems to have been orchestrated to give a lot of power to one man, upsetting the checks and balances system of the country. Well, it may have benefited Bush, but in the last couple years we've seen how big a backlash such an attempt at a power grab in our country will cause. In truth, there's no conspiracy needed to explain what happened post-9/11, with the Patriot Act, and the embracing of Nazi Herman Goering's philosophy of control by the Right ("Voice or no voice, controlling the people is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are under attack, and then label the pacifists as unpatriotic.")
The answer as to how things seem to fall into place so smoothly for Bush was simple: Opportunism.
We know from Richard Baer and others who worked on counter-terrorism that from day one, the intention was to spin the attack into a war against Iraq. In all likelihood, they were going to try and pull us into this war anyway, but they didn't know how to do it.
Osama bin Laden gave them the reason they were looking for.
The irony, of course, and of no surprise to people who know a modicum of history, is that bin Laden's so-called attempt to "save" the Middle East from western influence has led to the largest bloom of western influence in the middle east since the Crusaders took Jerusalem.
By declaring himself the enemy and attacking when and how he did, he empowered his worst enemy to galactic proportions.
Apparently, Sun Tzu isn't translated into Arabic.

Hoping for my breakout

2007-11-08T12:22:00.000-05:00

Maybe it's a silly hope, but I don't think so.
Lately I've been really putting in a lot of work on my writing. Last night I sat a bit and tried to make sense of all that I've been doing...and try to get a better feel of what, exactly, I'm hoping to achieve.
My primary project at the moment is a couple of short stories that I have been invited to submit for an Anthology novel based off the Rifts role-playing game. After that, I'm going to start pounding out a full-blown novel.
On top of that I've just submitted another game book to them, have one already in review that I need to do some rewriting on, and I'm cleaning up Dragon Diaries for submission to WOTC, which is looking for non-D&D contemporary fantasy novels this cycle.
In between all that I try to sandwich in plenty of quality time with my son and Rae....and some recreation as well.
Why?
I think I'm hoping for my breakout moment. I'm 34. I'd hoped to have been published as an author by now. Rae always laughs when I say that, reminding me I've been published thousands of times over more than the last decade as a reporter. It's true, my name's on a LOT of by-lines, and there's no lacking in my clip portfolio. But it's different from seeing your name on the spine of a book.
That's what I want. That's the hurdle I've not yet been able to clear.
When I was young and just starting out as a writer (after converting from my dreams of being a fighter pilot/astronaut...don't laugh, I actually had a seat at the naval academy waiting for me), I first wanted to be a reporter on a mainstream metropolitan city desk. I got that at the Detroit News, and even helped launch their Livingston County Bureau, which was a pretty good success.
It took awhile. I worked at two smaller papers over about four years after college to get that position (although I'd interned at the news throughout college, so I was kind of doing it then too).
Then, I wanted to work in D.C., on Capitol Hill. I got that. I got to rub elbows with the likes of Hillary Clinton, John McCain, etc. I got to bust a plan by Donald Rumsfeld to privatize the Army Corps of Engineers, got to travel the country. It was a good gig for a while, and almost all I was looking for. But I got bored, started to get itchy, and it started showing in my work. My vision had moved on.
I wrote a novel immediately after that, but I haven't been able to sell it yet. So, while waiting, I freelanced for a cigar magazine. I'd always wanted to freelance like that. It was good money, really easy work and the silliest, lightest hours you've ever seen (I worked about eight weeks worth in one year and made the same as when I worked full-time). But there were no benefits and it was feast or famine...and after hitting a long stretch of famine I went back to work.
The RPG book was another dream. Two are in pre-production. So that goal is just a matter of time.
But still, my Holy Grail, the published novel, is not quite here yet. It's the one thing, the only thing, that I haven't been able to put a check mark by. I'm bound and determined to do it.
I want my son to grow up having known of me being nothing but a novelist. Ultimately, it's what I'd like to do for the entirety of my living.
Some have suggested I do erotica, as that's what a lot of sci-fi writers do at the very beginning of their career (you'd be surprised..some very famous Hugo-winners wrote smut under an assumed name), but I haven't been enthusiastic about that idea.
So, I soldier on...putting in basically a double workday sometimes, as I come home from work to put in several hours of writing and research. I know rae gets tired of the only view of me being from peering over a computer screen, but she understands what drives me (though she laments my Type A personality).
I'm going to get there. There will come a day when that goal is in the "done" column, and I'm writing books regularly.
I wonder, however, what I'll target then. I've got at least three good ideas for some screenplays....

I really didn't know what hard was

2007-10-19T11:00:00.000-04:00

You know, before I became a dad, there were days in my life that I thought were "hard." And in truth, some of them still were extremely difficult, but have dulled with time.
But it's a different kind of "hard" that I face every morning I go to work.
I have to leave beautiful rae and my infant son, Joseph, every morning, and not see them for the rest of the day. When I get home, I hold him for an hour, at most, while at the same time trying to stay connected with rae AND engaging in all the other little stuff I do (writing freelance on the side, posting on various sites, trying to "decompress" after work with some World of Warcraft, Jade Empire, or simply by watching "the word" on Colbert Report). On top of that, I try to help rae out where I can.
It's hard in a way that I'm not familiar with. Before, I worked from home because I just didn't want to be in an office. I think flourescent lighting and cubicles are bad for the human soul. And I liked doing a day's work in my robe and slippers.
Now, it's something else. I feel it's almost a necessity that I find a way to work from home on a permanent basis. The trick is finding that way. Freelance writing is really feast or famine, and that's fine and well if you're a bachelor and don't mind a couple weeks of ramen noodles one month and eating filet mignon the next. But Joseph needs diapers every day. And both he and rae (and I) need medical coverage.
So, for now, I kiss them both (repeatedly sometimes) and leave for work. I hope to change this in the near future.

I'm a dad

2007-09-25T16:58:00.001-04:00

On September 23, 2007 at 6:21 a.m., I became a father. My son, Joseph Alessandro, arrived after 41 weeks of pregnancy, 23 hours at the hospital, 12 hours of active labor and a quick 10 minutes of actual pushing.
It was, in a word, amazing. I know, I know. Everyone who has had a child has said that. But, there's a reason. It's true.
I can't really describe much of the experience without sounding trite and...well, corny. The actual childbirth was part Discovery Channel documentary, part Family Channel drama and part episode of MASH. The event was all...miracle is such an overused word. Let's just say it was the most emotional, wondrous incident I've ever lived through.
Joseph and mommy are doing quite well. We got home only today in the afternoon. That was a lot longer in the hospital than we anticipated. There was nothing wrong, but it's Johns Hopkins policy to keep mother and child two nights. They are extremely cautious, health and safety conscious. It makes you feel very secure.
Joseph has a blend of our looks, though Rae thinks he looks more like me. He has what appear to be light brown eyes, but as a newborn, they could shift still. Personally, I think they're going to go hazel. He has long, dark, straight hair so far, and his skin tone is pretty close to that of his mom's.
He's absolutely adorable. So much so that hospital staff occasionally seemed to be caught by surprise. Rae thinks they're good at that by now and probably do that with all parents, but I think it was genuine.
So now we're home. He's feeding every hour and a half to two hours, which is wearing on mom, but she's holding up okay. But that leaves me to do, essentially, everything else. On top of that, I have a book deadline for Palladium at the end of the week. I have to get the last few items from my writing partner, merge it all together, edit and prep for send-off by Saturday. Fortunately, I have the week off. I have a feeling it will go all too quickly.
But I'm happy. Happy on a level I've never been before.
Even though it feels like the end of something, and that we've reached a destination, I know it's just the beginning. I look forward to the trip.

The Very Strange Confession of Walter G. Haut

2007-09-13T09:10:00.001-04:00

Okay, here's one for the conspiracy theorists to crow about. Everyone is familiar with the Roswell Crash of 1947 and the claims of Ufologists that it was a downed UFO. Everyone's also familiar with the government's story that it was a weather balloon...then admitting there was a cover-up of...a weather balloon.
Well, a new wrinkle has been added to this story, one that strongly supports the "little green men" theory.
In 2002 the Roswell base public information officer from 1947, Walter G. Haut, signed a sealed affidavit to be released only after his death. In it, well...read for yourself. It's pretty damning. It's unlikely that he's lying. Deathbed confession from a respected soldier who was entrusted with public information distribution of (at that time) the only nuclear capable air wing in the United States of America? What's more, he never made mention of the bodies or craft in any previous discussions, being fairly tight-lipped on the incident.
Pretty much, the only defense skeptics have in this instance is to call him a liar. And who's going to buy that a deathbed confession from this guy, which in no way profits himself or his family, and fits perfectly with fulfilling his secrecy oaths, just decided to leave the world with a lie?
That's almost as wild as the idea of aliens. At least we know with all the stars in the galaxy and all the planets we're finding that alien life is extremely likely. The odds of this guy just arbitrarily leaving a lie behind as legacy are much lower.
Note that the affidavit was created in 2002, and Haut died in 2005. It was opened in 2006 and its existence became known just this year.

2002 SEALED AFFIDAVIT OF WALTER G. HAUT
DATE: December 26, 2002
WITNESS: Chris Xxxxxx
NOTARY: Beverlee Morgan

(1) My name is Walter G. Haut

(2) I was born on June 2, 1922

(3) My address is 1405 W. 7th Street, Roswell, NM 88203

(4) I am retired.

(5) In July, 1947, I was stationed at the Roswell Army Air Basein Roswell, New Mexico, serving as the base Public Information Officer. I had spent the 4th of July weekend (Saturday, the 5th,and Sunday, the 6th) at my private residence about 10 miles north of the base, which was located south of town.

(6) I was aware that someone had reported the remains of a downed vehicle by midmorning after my return to duty at the base on Monday, July 7. I was aware that Major Jesse A. Marcel, head of intelligence, was sent by the base commander, Col. William Blanchard, to investigate.

(7) By late in the afternoon that same day, I would learn that additional civilian reports came in regarding a second site just north of Roswell. I would spend the better part of the day attending to my regular duties hearing little if anything more.

(8) On Tuesday morning, July 8, I would attend the regularly scheduled staff meeting at 7:30 a.m. Besides Blanchard, Marcel;CIC [Counterintelligence Corp] Capt. Sheridan Cavitt; Col. JamesI. Hopkins, the operations officer; Lt. Col. Ulysses S. Nero,the supply officer; and from Carswell AAF in Fort Worth, Texas, Blanchard's boss, Brig. Gen. Roger Ramey and his chief of staff, Col. Thomas J. Dubose were also in attendance. The main topic of discussion was reported by Marcel and Cavitt regarding an extensive debris field in Lincoln County approx. 75 miles NW ofRoswell. A preliminary briefing was provided by Blanchard about the second site approx. 40 miles north of town. Samples ofwreckage were passed around the table. It was unlike any material I had or have ever seen in my life. Pieces which resembled metal foil, paper thin yet extremely strong, and pieces with unusual markings along their length were handled from man to man, each voicing their opinion. No one was able to identify the crash debris.

(9) One of the main concerns discussed at the meeting waswhether we should go public or not with the discovery. Gen.Ramey proposed a plan, which I believe originated from his bosses at the Pentagon. Attention needed to be diverted from the more important site north of town by acknowledging the other location. Too many civilians were already involved and the press already was informed. I was not completely informed how this would be accomplished.

(10) At approximately 9:30 a.m. Col. Blanchard phoned my office and dictated the press release of having in our possession a flying disc, coming from a ranch Northwest of Roswell, andMarcel flying the material to higher headquarters. I was to deliver the news release to radio stations KGFL and KSWS, and newspapers the Daily Record and the Morning Dispatch.

(11) By the time the news release hit the wire services, my office was inundated with phone calls from around the world. Messages stacked up on my desk, and rather than deal with the media concern, Col Blanchard suggested that I go home and "hideout."

(12) Before leaving the base, Col. Blanchard took me personally to Building 84 [AKA Hangar P-3], a B-29 hangar located on theeast side of the tarmac. Upon first approaching the building, I observed that it was under heavy guard both outside and inside. Once inside, I was permitted from a safe distance to first observe the object just recovered north of town. It was approx. 12 to 15 feet in length, not quite as wide, about 6 feet high,and more of an egg shape. Lighting was poor, but its surface did appear metallic. No windows, portholes, wings, tail section, or landing gear were visible.

(13) Also from a distance, I was able to see a couple of bodies under a canvas tarpaulin. Only the heads extended beyond the covering, and I was not able to make out any features. The heads did appear larger than normal and the contour of the canvas suggested the size of a 10 year old child. At a later date in Blanchard's office, he would extend his arm about 4 feet above the floor to indicate the height.

(14) I was informed of a temporary morgue set up to accommodate the recovered bodies.

(15) I was informed that the wreckage was not "hot"(radioactive).

(16) Upon his return from Fort Worth, Major Marcel described tome taking pieces of the wreckage to Gen. Ramey's office and after returning from a map room, finding the remains of a weather balloon and radar kite substituted while he was out of the room. Marcel was very upset over this situation. We would not discuss it again.

(17) I would be allowed to make at least one visit to one of the recovery sites during the military cleanup. I would return tothe base with some of the wreckage which I would display in my office.
(18) I was aware two separate teams would return to each site months later for periodic searches for any remaining evidence.

(19) I am convinced that what I personally observed was some type of craft and its crew from outer space.

(20) I have not been paid nor given anything of value to make this statement, and it is the truth to the best of my recollection.

Signed: Walter G. Haut
December 26, 2002
Signature witnessed by:Chris Xxxxxxx

I'm usually NOT this partisan

2007-08-29T13:39:00.000-04:00

..but come on Republicans. The lame-arse excuses being pumped out over the Sen. Larry Craig scandal is really corny.

Let’s start the next exciting round of REPUBLICAN EXCUSE ROUND-UP!
1. “We get rid of our sickos.” — BZZZTT!!! Oh! I’m sorry, that’s the wrong answer! Mark Foley was known to be chasing little boys for YEARS and you only moved to get rid of him when he got caught! Everyone knows about Ted “Bridge to Nowhere” Stevens and he’s still hanging on. Where was “getting rid of the sickos” when it came out Vitter was putting on diapers and going to see “Ho’s”? Virtually everyone involved in Iran-contra was able to be employed under following Republican administrations. And have you booted Bob “Black people scare me enough to make me suck dick” Allen yet? Huh? Speak up!
2. Dems do it too! — BZZZZTT!! I’m sorry, that answer was disqualified when I was four years old! What’s more, what exactly did they do? Did they claim to be paragons of morality and then sneak off to bathrooms to smoke pole while trying to sign discrimination against others with their own urges into the constitution? Has it ever occurred to you that the reason Dems get re-elected is that they present themselves as human beings? Clinton lied, and he apologized and we forgave him. You know…like good CHRISTIANS! You’ve heard of them, right? If Craig came out and said “look, I have this problem and I’ve been trying to hide it and it’s not working and I’m sorry.” I wouldn’t have a problem with the guy. He plead guilty and got his sentence. Instead, we’ll have to deal with him going to gay rehab and whatnot…
3. Aha! You Dems are homophobes too! Look how you hate on Craig! — BZZZT!! Oooh, I’m sorry. But the correct answer was that Democrats don’t have a problem with him being gay, they have a problem with him being a hypocrit. Much like you’re being when you claim you get rid of your sickos. It’s the hipocrasy, stupid.We’ve got Bob “on my knees” Allen pushing laws against lewd public behavior, Ted “anti-gay evangelical leader” Haggard who couldn’t decide whether to fill his mouth with gay prostitute pole or meth, Mark “council on missing and EXPLOITED children” Foley chasing little boys, and now Capt. Conservative Craig trying for an under the stall reacharound. It’s called “pattern recognition.”
4. But..but…what’s the crime in acting wierd in a stall? You all are prejudging him! — BZZT!!! He already PLEAD GUILTY! So he’s either a sick perv (children use those bathrooms) or he perjured himself. And he’s an idiot to boot for not getting a lawyer and thinking he’d never be found out. And you never mention the flash of the Senate business card when you try this lame defense. Read the report, he was charged with misconduct, but he admitted guilt to lewd behavior. The words are right there.

I’m sorry, but you lose. But America has a consolation prize for you, I suspect…one that will be delivered in early November of 2008!

(if you see this labeled I.J. elsewhere it's because I dropped it in a couple blog comment sections, it wasn't stolen)

home stretch

2007-08-06T08:50:00.000-04:00

So, Rae and I are entering the home stretch of impending parenthood.
The baby is due in mid-September and I really thought I'd be more nervous than this. I am nervous, but only a little really. This entire thing has been a lot less scary than most people made it out to be. Of course, I say that not having had the baby yet.
We've done everything we can to prepare. We got certified in first aid and infant CPR, took a child-birth course, and we've made good progress on getting the nursery set up in the back room and relocating the office upstairs.
Last week the doctor put rae on bedrest for a week and that worried me for a bit, but she seems to be doing just fine, and a follow-up ultrasound showed that little Joseph is developing right as he should be.
Rae was asking me the other day what I anticipated most. She can't wait to hold the baby in her arms. I can't either, but perhaps more than that, I am intensely curious as to what kind of a Man Joseph will grow up to be. I will do all in my power to make sure he grows up to be an honorable, responsible, successful man, of course. But even in that framework there are so many different men he could become, and I am very anxious to meet that man, though I'll certainly enjoy watching the boy mould into that future man's shape.

Cloverfield Addiction

2007-07-13T16:11:00.000-04:00

So, I'm really caught up in this speculation surrounding J.J. Abrahms' secretive monster movie, tentatively called 1-18-08 (the release date), Cloverfield, the parasite, or Slusho, depending on who you talk to.

The buzz started with the release of the trailer in front of Transformers the Movie. The untitled trailer, available at http://www.apple.com/trailers, shows a going away party for a guy named Rob. During the party, being filmed on a hand-held camera, a monster attacks NYC. You never see it, but you do see the head of the statue of liberty get chucked down the street.
There are a lot of theories on the movie and several connected "viral" websites meant to kick up the buzz factor. One of the websites is http://www.1-18-08.com/.
The other website is http://www.slusho.jp/
Now, the 1-18-08 is obvious. it's the release date of the film. But what about this "slusho" stuff?
Slusho is a drink from Alias and Lost, both are Abrahms projects (like Big Kahuna burger shows up in Quentin Tarantino films) and if you look carefully, when the guy suggests they go to the roof, he is wearing a slusho shirt. Also, buzz is that on the filming site, the project is referred to as Slusho.
The three big theories surrounding this movie are 1: it's Voltron, 2. it's a new Godzilla film, or 3. It's based on H.P. Lovecraft's Cthulhu Mythos, of which, "Call of Cthulhu" is the centerpiece story. Read it here: http://tmoct.co.uk/lovecraft/callofcthulhu.htm

I am a follower of the Cthulhu theory. Abrahms has said that Lovecraft inspired some of the obscure plotting behind Lost and he's a fan.

It's WAY too dramatic and horror-inspired in the trailer to deal with giant robot lions from space and Drew Goddard is not the writer for the upcoming Voltron film. So, no, it's not Voltron. And the person in the crowd says "It's ALIVE! It's huge!" Not "It's a lion."

Additionally, Toho is NOT allowing any Godzilla or Godzilla-related films. They have a Godzilla ban in place on the intellectual property. It ain't Godzilla. Period.

A little more evidence that 1-18-08 is about Cthulhu.

Go to the Slusho website and read the history.Ganu, the discoverer of Slusho, discovered the secret ingredient on the sea floor. Cthulhu and his city of R'yleh is on the ocean floor off the coast of Japan, where Ganu is from.
Ganu, after discovering the secret ingredient, gets the inspiration to turn it into slusho from dreams. Cthulhu speaks to his followers in dreams.

"Rob" is going to Japan (perhaps to go work for slusho?). Note that he seems not as surprised as everyone else.

On the Slusho website it says the secret ingredient needs to be kept cold. Look at the temperature on the newscast, and remember that it's supposed to be January 18 in New York City. That's a severe heat wave for NYC in January. They are calling the monster "the parasite" according to many sources.

I think it's something Cthulhu related that had to be kept frozen, Rob was on his way to Japan to work for Slusho. There was a heat wave, and "it" awoke. "It" is a parasite inside Slusho that gives it its addictive flavor.

So note that on July 13, at 4:20 P.M. I made this prediction. Let's see how close I was in a few months or as more details are released.

Lord of the Rings Online Review

2007-06-15T20:06:00.001-04:00

A couple of weeks ago, I bought a copy of Lord of the Rings Online to give it a run around the block. It's a game I'd been anticipating for the last two years and I'm glad to say that overall it does not disappoint.
So, here's my review of Lord of the Rings Online: Shadows of Angmar.

LOTRO takes place at the same time as the events in Lord of the Rings, but covers a, generally, different part of Middle Earth and the War of the Ring. Players can choose from one of four Tolkien races: humans, elves, dwarves or hobbits. You can then, based on your race, choose from one of several classic MMORPG classes. There are captains, champions, guardians, hunters, lore masters, burglars and minstrels. Character creation is detailed, allowing you to make very unique characters, on par with the character creation detail level in Everquest 2, but still not as detailed as Star Wars Online, however it does allow more flexibility than the current MMORPG god, World of Warcraft. Skin tone, hair style, body build, facial features and even characteristic scars allow you to have the possibility of making your elf hunter (and you know you're going to make one) look different enough from everyone elses elf hunter. What's more, during the creation process you can choose which region your character is from, which allows for different visual creation options. For example, Gondorian humans can have dark skin, while a human from Rohan cannot. Additionally, name creation is very restricted. What this means is that you are confined to names that sound like they belong on Middle Earth, and there's a handy naming suggestion guide with each character class, specific to your character's region of birth. This has its ups and downs, as it keeps the game immersion from being interrupted by seeing names like kewlelfdude10101. But, it can be frustrating trying name after name before finding one that is allowable and hasn't already been taken.
Once your character is created, you go through the prerequisiste tutorial and a beginner's area before being transported to the world proper.
Graphically, LOTR is well done, but it's nothing that will blow your mind. It lacks the vibrance of World of Warcraft and the ultrarealistic color tones of Everquest 2. However, the style is very reminiscent of illustrator Alan Lee's Tolkien works, which makes the artwork fit with the subject matter. There are ancient, crumbling elven ruins, thick-walled dwarven fortresses and a host of creatures and monsters well-rendered enough to please. The graphics often harken to the LOTR films by Peter Jackson, but it's virtually never a direct copy. I assume this is because while they got the rights to use the book material, they did not have the rights to use images from the film.
Sound in LOTR is pretty good. There's some use of voice over, but generally for introductions, special scenes and very specific pieces of dialog. The monsters make a variety of cool noises and again, in little ways, it is clear that the creators tried to invoke the tone of the movies, even if they could not borrow from them directly. A dying bear gives a last mournful groan that sounds a lot like the dying cave troll in Fellowship of the Rings, for example. Additionally, the music is again reminiescent of the films, while being original. In some ways it reminds me of Jeremy Soul's work on Knights of the Old Republic and the Icewind Dale games, but it doesn't quite attain that level of emotional involvement. It is background music, and it does a good job at being that.
The interface is simple, intuitive, and quite often very similar to world of warcraft and everquest 2. There's no groundbreaking stuff here, but on the plus side the learning period is pretty short. There are several nice little additions which do make things easier. For example, you can choose which quests are visible at the side of the screen, which gives a brief synopsis of the quest goals. Unlike EQ2 and WOW, you already come equipped with multiple bags and backpacks, so there is no looking for crafters to make you 20-slot bags so you can carry around all your stuff. However, the inventory pictures are smallish and a lot of stuff tends to look similar, making inventory feel a bit cumbersome at times when you are looking for something. Movement is the old mouse or WSAD combination and there are plenty of hotkey options and a handy key guide comes with the game.
Game play itself is quick and easy, often engrossing, and probably where this game shines the most. It is specifically designed to make grinding not feel like grinding. Missions have a depth of story to them, even when it is the same kill/escort/gather/retrieve mission formats. There are far more story-driven mission chains than in WoW and EQ2, and there is a specific storyline called the epic quests that keep your character from just feeling adrift in the world. Probably the most refreshing new aspect and innovation of this game is the deed system. Deeds are like mini-quests specifically to counter the feel of grinding. They are found through random events, such as killing a particular type of creature or finding a particular item, and generally require you to kill x amount of a specific type of creature, use x power a specific number of times, or find all the landmarks in a region associated with a particular group. A complete deed generally gives you one of two rewards: a title, which you can cause to be displayed next to your name (such as Rivinn, Defender of the Halls) or special bonuses that enhance other skills. However, you only have a certain number of slots open at any one time for these bonuses, and going to a bard to have them applied to your character costs money. However this makes you think about how to build your character, and allows for more customization than leveling, again lending to more unique characters. Questing is fun, intriquing and moves at a good pace, and the stories behind the quests make them a tad more engrossing than WoW. And if you are a Tolkien fan then you are likely to find killing spiders for Tom Bombadill far more interesting than killing them for an EQ2 quest NPC that you never heard of.
Groups are called, appropriately, fellowships, and the game incorporates a similar "chain attack" special moves system like that found in EQ2. Usually started by the burgular in the group (making them very valuable), all the members of a fellowship choose a color during group combat. The right combination sets off a "group combo" move.
Now where LOTR departs most from other games of its genre is in its PvP aspect. At 10th level you are given the option of creating a monster race character. Ettins, Spiders, trolls, orcs, uruk hai, etc. are available. Every level after 10 you receive destiny points that you can use to bump up this character, which starts off at level 40. You can then do evil missions with them or fight player characters using their normal characters in the ettinmoors. Currently, the later is underutilized because the game is so new there are not many players who have high enough level characters to fight the monster races. Still, it is really an interesting way to approach PvP, and who doesn't want to be one of the spawn of Shelob?
Another place where Lord of the Rings shines is its crafting system. Characters pick an overarching profession (such as woodsman), which gives them three different crafting skills. Two of these skills will be complimentary. The third will be related to your profession, but reliant on a crafting or gathering skill you don't have in order to fully utilize it. For example, someone with the woodsman profession will have woodworking (for making bows, spears, staves and other wood-based weaponry), foresting (for gathering wood for the woodworking skill, as well as for turning leather hides into usable boiled leather pieces) and farming (allowing you to grow fruits and vegetables in farm fields as well as good old hobbit pipe weed). The foresting and woodworking compliment each other well, but you're farming is primarily to provide resources to people with cooking skills. Further, the leather you make as a forester will aid armorers, who can make leather armor but can't cure the leather hides they need for the armor.
Crafting goes up in tiers (apprentice, journeyman and Master), which unlock new, more advanced recipes and allows you to use special items to give Master-level creations a little boost. Further, the tiers are all point-based, and you know exactly how many crafting points you will get with each item you make. There's no chance at failure, so you can easily figure out that making 25 Rowan spears at 8 crafting points each will get you the 200 points you need to become a journeyman first tier woodworker, thus allowing you to plan ahead. I'm sure crafting math guides are springing up all over already. While this takes away the fun mini-game aspects of crafting found in EQ2, and the unpredictability of when you will get crafting "raises" like in WoW or Ultima Online, it gives a certain stability to crafting that makes it easy and accessible to players who are not big on the crafting aspect, while still giving crafters something to sink their teeth into.
Overall, while innovative in places, LOTR is a solid MMORPG that takes what its predecessors has done and in most cases learns from them. The game play more than makes up for good, but not outstanding, graphics and sound and the Tolkien source material seems well-used. Quests abound, the storylines are rich and involving, the player races and character classes are well thought out, but except for a few surprises here and there we've seen them all before. The Tolkien fans are going to carry this game most likely, as except for a few little innovations, there is nothing new here for non-Tolkien loving EQ2 or WoW fans. I think the EQ2 types are going to gravitate towards its more "grown up" attitude a bit faster than WoW adherents, which could be trouble for EQ and EQ2.
It is fun, appropriately addictive, but you can also walk away from it without as much of that "just...one...more...level..." crack-like addiction of WoW. It's already stolen my girl Rae, who is one of those "I read the Similliarion (or however it's spelled)" types of Tolkien fans. It will also appeal to anyone who prefers to play on the role-play servers of other MMORPGs. It definitely did a better job with handling a known property than Dungeons and Dragons Online did, and is about as different as, well, the Lord of the Rings movies as compared to the Dungeons and Dragons movie.
The only game that's really going to be hurt by this game is EQ2, as it attracts the same kinds of players in general. The l33t crowd and younger players probably won't find it too appealing, and the jury is still out on whether PvP players will be interested in monster race play.
Future add-ons are said to include player housing too, which will be a definite advantage over WoW.
If you are Tolkien fan and like MMORPGs, this is your game. If you're a more mature RPG gamer, this too is probably your game. If not, WoW will probably continue to serve you just fine.

Back

2007-06-05T12:41:00.000-04:00

So, after about a week in Michigan for the Palladium Books Open House (which I'll get to later), I got back home and had to send my computer to Gateway the following week. The screen was going out and the hinges were cracking. Apparently that's a common problem with laptops. They fixed it, but its the same design so I figure I'll have the same problem by this time next year (the lap top is exactly a year old, give or take a week), except that when it happens next time I won't have a warranty.

But I'm back now. Originally, I intended this blog to be a bit of a soap box, but I've had so much going on in my life that I rarely get the chance recently to sit down and compose a well-constructed post that addresses whatever political or social topic rattling around in my head. So, I think I'll take this to a more frequent stream-of-consciousness blog, with the occasional traditional Dark Lord Rant (tm) thrown in for good measure.

So, the Palladium Open House.
It was a booming success for me personally. The owner, Kevin Siembieda, announced one of my books at the VIP Friday, which was very warmly received by fans. I was approached through the weekend by several who seemed at least as excited about the book as I am. That's a good feeling. I brought a draft of it and showed it around and generated a bit more excitement. What's more, at a Thursday meeting for freelance writers, Kev gave me permission to try my hand at another secret project that would not only be huge for Rifts if successful, but would fulfil a few personal dreams of my own. Wish I could give details, but I want official announcements to come from the company first. Seems the smart way to work this.
Of course, at the Open House I met great people I'd gamed with in the past, people I'd only known online, and people I'd never met before. Not only did I hook up with my old gaming group from Ann Arbor/Port Huron, but I also got together with Charles Walton, an artist whose been a friend of mine since high school.
I'm contemplating giving him a spot on my personal domain for his artwork, since he doesn't have a site of his own that I'm aware of. He and I are working on a comic book together that we hope will get picked up by a major company. Unfortunately, I've had so much going on that I haven't been able to focus on it like I want to. That'll change this summer. He's been patient enough.
Rae got to meet more of the family, and I got to see Detroit, which is looking better and better every time I visit. I think, because I only pop in there once a year or so, that I see the changes more dramatically than those that live there. For example, I was nearly floored by Metro Airport. What they've done with the place is jaw-dropping. I was really impressed.
Metro Airport used to be one of the crappiest air ports I'd ever flown into, and I've flown into air ports all over the country. It was really sad.
What I saw last month was a whole different animal, and whoever was behind the renovation needs his or her own statue out front, maybe to replace that big, dumb Joe Louis fist.
Half the freeways were shutdown, which made driving around a pain, but that's what you can expect in Spring in Michigan.
Still, I don't think I'd ever move back their permanently, unless it was to move to Ann Arbor. Not keen on reliving Michigan winters.
On a last note regarding the Open House, I'm definitely considered an "official" freelance writer now. Alex called me last week and dropped a rush assignment on me for the Rifter. It's a cool little gig that I had fun doing. It also gave me a chance to work with one of my favorite Palladium Artists, Apollo Okamura. I love his work and he and I get along really well. Rae and Apollo and the Manning Bros (also Palladium Artists) hung out and bonded most of the weekend during the Open House. He's a great guy who's far too humble considering his vast talent.
Basically, he drew a picture of someone for an upcoming Rifter, and I took the picture and turned it into a fully-developed character with backstory, stats and flavor text. It should be published before the summer's out. Hopefully the guys at Palladium like reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Check out Apollo's work at http://www.apollookamura.com

Well, that's enough for now. I'm typing this at the new Panera's that opened on the corner. They have free wi-fi and I prefer to blog from my laptop instead of from my computer at work for privacy issues.

I've been trying out Lord of the Rings Online, and I think in the next day or so I'll post my own personal review of this long-awaited MMORPG.

Going home

2007-05-02T23:39:00.000-04:00

So I'm headed back up to Michigan this weekend for the Palladium Open House. I have a lot of mixed feelings. I'm a little nervous because my books are not done deals yet, and I'm probably going to be a bit on edge until there's an official announcement and some cover art on their website. I'm excited, because I rewrote some things I think the company owner will be pleased with, but I'm trying not to get too worked up about the whole deal until I see some concrete movement.
Getting an RPG or two (or four or more) would be a dream come true, but it's not going to put me anywhere near easy street. I hope to use it as a luanch vehicle for novels and for publishing creds to expand my writing career.
I'm worried about getting too rusty. It's been about three years since I last did serious hard news reporting and I'm thinking of getting back into the game before my edge is totally gone.
The good thing about writing for Palladium is that, published or not, it is keeping the creative juices flowing and honed.
We fly out of here in the morning, and I hate flying. Fortunately I have some xanax that are still good, so I'm going to pop one tomorrow morning before the flight so I'm not a bundle of nerves. The sad part is that I used to be student pilot. You'd think I'd be as cool as a cucumber right? For some reason I'm totally calm in a little lawn-mower engine plane (partially because I could probably pull and emergency landing if something goes wrong), but big flights make me nervous.
It's only like an hour and a half flight though, so I'm staying up late tonight so I'll be tired and sleep through as much of it as possible.
Over the weekend, I've been told that a lot of my friends from Port Huron will be there and I look forward to that.
I'm one of those people that are terrible about keeping in touch and I always feel bad about it, but I get really caught up in the here and now and the people around me. There are a few friends this will probably never apply to, like my friend Hari and Vox, because my friendship with them is on a whole other level. My friend Owen and I used to be like that, but we drifted. Not sure why, but haven't had a good sit-down with Owen in a while.
It's odd, most of my friends have stayed put in Detroit, or Michigan in general, while I've hopped from place to place. It makes it hard to bond with people, hard to make REAL friends. The one major person I did that with in Baltimore is Vox, but he's about the only one unless you count Rae. There are other people down here who I am friends with, but I'm not calling them in the evenings or chatting online with them.
I guess, overall, I tend to not really be that sociable. A quiet night at home is rarely a bad idea to me, and when I do gather with friends, I don't like masses and masses of them coming at me at once.
This weekened will be an exception. A lot of people at this Open House know me from the Palladium Books forums, and a lot of them have read my work online and written me e-mails of encouragement. So, like it or not, I'll be at the center of a lot of handshaking and conversation.
Then, of course, their's family. I can't wait to see them. It's so rare that I get the opportunity.
As with friends, I'm not the kind of guy that gets on the phone and calls his mother or family every other week. Just doesn't pop into my head to do so. Not that I don't love them or want to know what's going on, it's just not my nature to keep all sorts of contact with people.
I actually hope it is something I can change about myself through the years. I hate getting that call after two years of no contact that starts with "Hey, jerk...remember your friend _____! Can't ya pick up the phone some time?"
Of course, they haven't called me in all that time either...but for some reason I never get insulted.

Once I get back from the Open House I'll post a postOH report here and probably on the boards as well.
Sorry about the rambling stream of consciousness.

No easy answers

2007-04-18T14:22:00.000-04:00

In the aftermath of the horrible tragedy at Virginia Tech, everyone seems to be casting about for easy answers. Most of those seem to be either to ban all guns, or allow professors and students on campus to be armed. Neither of these is a really good idea.
All over the internet there are ludicrous claims that this incident would have been cut short by one professor with a gun. Or, worse yet, arming several thousand high-strung, sometimes not totally mature, college students.
The thought that arming the students and faculty would have helped in this case is simply absurd. Now, I'm a defender of the 2nd amendment, and no fan of gun control, but lets be real here. If there had been, say 10 people with guns in that building, how would anyone have known who to shoot?That situation was chaos and pandemonium. Let's say you're a professor and you've got your gun. There's gunfire in the hallway. Kids screaming, a storm of kids running past your doorway. You rush out with your gun to see two kids popping shots off at one another. One of them is in a doorway of a classroom near some bodies, the other seems to be the one the kids are running from. Who do you shoot? Neither, because both kids confused each other for the shooter, who has already moved to the next floor.
Additionally, now you've just made the situation more confusing for the police. SWAT has a bead on somebody firing shots from across the street through a window, but now they can't shoot because it could be anybody. The killer drops his guns and slips out or lies among the dead with a self-inflicted gunshot wound, while some poor schmoe with a CC license gets to be the next Ruby Ridge.
And lastly, the last thing that situation needed was more bullets flying around. Only the killer and the most astute professional military and police are calm in a situation like that, and then not always.This doesn't mean there needs to be some huge ban on firearms, but a 3 or 7 day waiting period while there was a gun check on Cho, that uncovered his stalking cases and mental health history, would have saved a lot more lives than some Wyatt Earp wannabe.

Banning all guns? That doesn't thrill me either. Yes, in countries where gun control was enacted nationwide, gun crimes are virtually nonexistent.
Additionally, D.C. (which some people point to as a sign gun bans do not work) has a problem because it is 5 minute drive across the Wilson Bridge to Virginia, which has no gun laws essentially. Anyone pointing to D.C. as a sign of failed gun control is being, at best, grossly disingenuous.
That said, if the English government decides to oppress its people, the English are screwed. They have no way to fight back, and I'm pretty sure there won't be some hero in a Guy Fawkes mask to save the day. Same goes in China. If the Chinese populace were armed, (or the North Korean one) there'd be a lot more kowtowing from the government.
Tyranny by the government over a populace of sheep will never happen here because they know we're armed.
The truth is this: If we want to have guns and protect our freedoms, we'll keep paying this price. There's no clean win here, something that both the gun control and anti-gun control advocates keep trying to sell us on. At least keep the debate honest. Neither side will result in an ideal situation. It isn't an ideal world. The question is: which slightly sucky situation do you want to live with? And is there a middle ground?
I think so. It's turned out, as I said earlier, that the shooter had cases of stalking and cases of mental illness that were documented. Things a background check would have hopefully discovered. But Virginia refuses to have even basic and reasonable gun laws. Thus 33 kids and professors are dead. It doesn't require a ban, doesn't even require that the state keep a track of what gun you bought and where you bought it. Heck, you could even stipulate that the background check files are confidential once the check is over and destroy them. The law-abiding, and sane, keep their guns, and the criminal, and insane, have one vector of obtaining a means to kill closed to them.
Yes, you can still get guns on the street. But let's look at Cho, the killer, or the kids from Columbine....now try to imagine them realistically getting guns illegal. Read up on Cho and envision him walking into, say, the D.C. ghetto and trying to find an illegal gun to buy....
Just keep the debate honest. Maybe, for once, that will lead to honest answers.

I'm back

2007-04-10T20:14:00.000-04:00

Sorry about the long delay in posting and being online in general. The last couple weeks have been rough. The last week of March we each worked 74 hours, 7 days straight through. The week before that we broke almost 50 hours.
This is lining up to be the first week that I haven't done overtime.
Furthermore, the deadline for the comicbook preview I was to write came up and had to get that out. Not totally satisfied with it, I was basically rewriting something someone had already mapped out plotwise. Fortunately, I'll get to rework it now that I have some time.
Additionally, I'm up against the line on an RPG being written by myself and another writer. Fortunately, that means we're basically only writing half a book each, but it still pretty hectic.
The end result is that if I haven't been working, I haven't been on the computer.
Things are finally loosening up though.
What's more, I'll see a lot of you in Michigan for the Palladium Open House where you can pelt me with old fruit for not keeping this up-to-date.

Swearing off swearing

2007-02-26T08:13:00.000-05:00

So I gave up two things for the Lent season. I always give up something that's actually an effort. I believe it builds character. Besides, I hate being beholden to anything. Makes me feel controlled and, if you know me, you know I can't stand that.
First, I gave up any and all fried chicken. No fried fowl til after Easter for me. So far that's been the easy one. The second thing I gave up was cursing. Rachael and I gave it up together.
We both thought she'd have the harder time of it, but we're discovering that in fact I'm having a more difficult time not swearing. Particularly in the car.
The moment I shut that door and pull into traffic, the explicatives start flowing. Its funny, but neither she nor I had ever noticed I did that before until now. So I guess swearing off swearing was a good choice, even if I have found myself using fictional, geek, curse words, like saying "frack" from Battlestar Galactica.
It's been a battle, I've slipped up regularly. But Rae's there to remind me and that helps drive my goal in a bit deeper. She seems to be having a fairly easy time of it, which surprised us both, as we thought she was the worst of the two of us when it came to swearing. I think, perhaps, it's just more jarring coming from Rae, who is very feminine, than it is coming from me.
When Rae drops an F-bomb, you notice. Apparently, however, one faulty traffic light during rush hour and I could level Coventry.
So, I keep trying, though I slip up again and again. Hopefully, in the end, some of it will stick. If I really swear this much it needs to stop. I didn't use to swear like this, I'm sure of that. I always thought explicatives were for those who lacked vocabulary.
Its hard to find out that I'm the one that needs to pick up a thesaurus more often these days.

Hectic times

2007-02-12T09:46:00.000-05:00

Sorry about the delay in blogging, but since the last post I've had to bail a good friend out of jail and deal with the fact that rae was in a car accident that totaled the car. She's okay, but the car's a goner. We're now going through the private hell of trying to find a new or used car of some quality worth sinking a monthly payment into.
There are quite a few things I want to blog about, but focusing with everything else going on has been difficult.
One thing I do want to comment on comes from a debate I was in regarding the myth of "activist judges." So-called activist judges are those judges who conservatives deem have created brand new laws, unintended by the people or constitution, during high-level court rulings.
However, when you look at these cases you find a few commonalities. First, and foremost, the "activist judge" label only ever gets applied to rulings, all rulings, that go against conservative goals. That should be your first warning sign.
Second, I read a lot of these cases on a level many people haven't. I've done deep analysis of Supreme Court and Appelate Court rulings such as the SWANCC, Lake Tahoe, and W. Va. mountaintop mining cases, among others. In general, the reality is that the decisions are made exactly in line with every other legal decision, based off of existing case law and constitutional interpretation. How strictly the word of the constitution is followed has nothing to do with whether a judge is an "activist" or not, but more to do with the judge's own political leanings.
If a conservative judge desires a conservative ruling that pushes the boundaries of the letter of existing law, be it Scalia or Thomas, they'll push the language to the extent of rationality. Same goes for liberal judges. They desire a ruling and seek to fit it within a legal framework.
Many argue that no legal change should be made unless its by people's vote, which sounds great, but actually undermines the entire construction of the three-branch system of government. Rule of majority is the first order of business for a democracy, however, our Founding Fathers put in a check against TYRANNY of the majority: the judicial system.
The judicial system is there because rule of the majority allowed segregated schools, Jim Crow laws and drinking fountains marked "colored only". The judicial system is there because rule of the majority would allow certain states to prevent blacks and whites from marrying. The judicial system is there because rule of the majority allowed impromptu eugenics and castration against alleged sufferers of mental retardation, which in some cases were simply poor children who couldn't afford to go to school.
Sometimes, justice and fair treatment of human beings cannot wait until 60 million white southerners decide its okay to start treating the rest of humanity like human beings. That's the wisdom of the judicial system. That's why our current system works better than any other in the world.
Hamstringing judicial jurisprudence may be one the most assinine concepts to hit the political scene in some time, and the lemmings that usually go for it tend to have fairly good notions in mind, but they haven't thought things through.
Even the conservatives who pump the concept do not actually want to see it through. it would leave them in too much of a lurch when their chosen judges would have to follow caselaw that goes against their desires.
The Strict Constructionists would have you believe they support sticking to the specific letter of written law, and that the laws should never be re-interpreted by judges. Of course, this stipulates that judges should keep thinking to a minimum, which is the opposite of the reason that they're judges.
Laws, and language change over time. So does the social situation of the country. Plessy v. Ferguson gives way to Brown v. Board of Education, and rightfully so. However, there is no honor, dignity, rightness, promotion of public good or strengthening of the union in allowing 50 years of human degradation because you want to wait for a constitutional amendment. All of our greatest Supreme Court Chief justices knew this, and often commented on it.
Chief Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes once said: "A word is not a crystal, transparent and unchanged; it is the skin of a living thought and may vary greatly in color and content according to the circumstances and time in which it is used."
Those who rail against so-called activist judges disagree, and would have our judicial sytem simply parroting arcane and outdated legal language and concepts to the detriment of justice and our country. Hannurabi's Code was written in stone, since then we've devised legal systems that are just a bit more flexible.

What if....

2007-01-29T12:54:00.001-05:00

Recently, there was a lot of attention given to a story run by the Chicago Tribune. You probably read it. It concerned various, fairly credible, employees at O'Hare Airport that spotted what they believed to be a disc-like craft hovering over Concourse C. After several minutes, the alleged vehicle shot through the clouds with so much force that it left a disc-shaped hole in the cloud cover. More than half of the country believes that some UFOs are extraterrestrial-manufactured vehicles. And the number grows steadily. I'm not going to discuss whether "they" are real or not. Old debate that doesn't get anywhere. It's a big universe and the odds we are alone are infintesimally small. So, really, it's not a question of "if", but "when." So what will happen when we meet "them?" Well, I think a lot of it depends on when and where we meet them. Let's look at the "tomorrow" scenario, meaning what if we discover intelligent alien society tomorrow. First, a lot would depend on how we find and contact them. There's three ways that could happen. 1. They contact us. 2. We contact them. 3. We discover evidence of their passing.In the first option, they'll either contact us by long-range communications or by visiting us directly. If it's the former, breathe a sigh of relief, they're probably peaceful. A message from beyond, probably in pure math, that says "hey, you're not alone, allow us to introduce ourselves" is a pretty good sign they're benign. This would spark a renaissance in human thinking. First, they're likely to share some technology that we could find useful. Then we have to change our view of the universe. However, some people believe it would bring about world peace and unity and stuff like that. I doubt it. If they're alien, they're philosophical standpoints are not likely to be compatible with ours on many levels. So much of what we do and how we think is genetic and evolutionary, although we don't like to think so. Beings who went through a different evolutionary path are not likely to think like we do. There would be both big and little differences. For example, they may not value individual freedom as something important. Or they value it far out of proportion to society. Then there will be the little things. They may not be as bashful about procreation. They may not understand privacy OR they could be ultra-private to the point where even staring someone in the eye is considered impolite, or asking a question of any kind. The point is that we'd have to adjust our way of thinking to associate with them somehow, and, likely for centuries, they're very presence and actions, even if peaceful, will be unnerving to many of us. The less tolerant groups on our world, such as religious fundamentalists and ultra-conservatives, are not likely to be able to deal well with an alien species. Their world views don't have the flexibility. Because, if they contact us from a distance, it will take years for us to communicate unless their first messages include instructions on how to create faster-than-light communications systems, it will be easier for us to get used to. It will be a gradual change that allows for a lot of debate, re-education and public discourse. We'll have time between communications to discuss how (and if) to respond. It will be unsatisfying in some ways, but we could adjust better.
If they show up on our doorstep, I'd be a little worried. If you're an advanced species that's peacefully exploring, you don't go parking your mothership over D.C. unless you have a sick sense of humor. If you're not peaceful, that's exactly the way you approach. Pearl Harbor on a planetary scale. If this happens, there's really not much we can do. If they are after the planet itself then its as simple as tailoring a biological agent and spraying it in the high atmosphere. In a few weeks we'd all be gone. Taking us as slaves and whatnot is also possible, though a bit more difficult. But unless we can get the nukes off we're done for until we could learn their technology and rebel in a few generations. Fortunately, physics seems to indicate that there's little defense against a nuke besides a really hardened structure. The problem is that they need guidance systems unless you use dumb "fire and forget" rockets.
2. We contact them.
Not in this lifetime I don't think. We've beamed out a couple signals into the ether on purpose, but we have no way of knowing if we're aiming them at anyone or anything capable of listening or responding. But, if by chance SETI picks up a signal not aimed at us, and we decide to beam a message, this is the means of contact that we will be the most able to adapt to. Before such a message is sent there will be a lot of public and scientific discourse on what the message should say. There will be analysis of their signals which will attempt to scry out their psychological profile and respond in the most appropriate manner. This would be the calmest transition we could have, most likely.
3. We discover evidence. The face on Mars turns out to be an actual structure (I know it's not, but for the sake of conversation...), an alien body's uncovered in an aztec tomb, an astronomer locates a Dyson Sphere a few light years away, a CNN news crew in Iraq happens to catch a clearly-defined craft hovering over Najaf at night, or a whistleblower stationed at Groom Lake comes forward with alien vessel debris. In a lot of ways, this is similar to if we are contacted. We still have to deal with the fact that they exist. However, there's no real pressure to contact them right away. If its evidence on earth, we have to ask ourselves why they haven't made contact. Was Gene Roddenberry right about there being a "Prime Directive" that says leave developing species alone? Or did they just decide we weren't worth actually talking to.
Most likely such evidence will be provable by the level of sophistication it holds. In other words it will be obvious it was not man-made or natural. A bit of an inferiority complex there, but we can handle it. If we are very lucky, the evidence would unlock secrets to their technology...an actual FTL-capable vessel would be great. This would allow us to visit them first on their own grounds. That's the best situation for us, in case that first meeting does not go well. We'd be better prepared, and there's the chance that we could cover our tracks and not let the local alien neighbors know which house is ours.
Previous studies by the U.S. government, such as the Brookings Report, worry that first contact will create fear and panic, widespread religious doubt, suicides, and a stock market crash to rival the Great Depression. I don't think so. I think we'd have to expand our world view a bit, but in most cases we'd have time to do that. And in the cases where they just show up, well then adjusting will be the least of our worries.

Is America ready for a (fill in the blank) President?

2007-01-18T10:14:00.000-05:00

Expect the above question frequently over the next year or so. It's time for America to look inward and see to what limits have tolerance, understanding, and rationality have spread throughout the nation.
As part of the changing demographics this day kind of had to come, although I don't think people expected it all to come down in one year.
Here's the situation:
Take a look at the most likely forerunners of the next election and you'll see something quite surprising. Of the five people most likely to be our next president, only one is a white male protestant.
There are the obvious deviations from the presidential norm: Hillary Clinton (a woman) and Barack Obama (african american). But if you look at the Republican candidates, with the exception of McCain, you find some very non-traditional options.
Rudolph Giuliani (my choice of Republican candidates) is both Italian and Roman Catholic. Depending on what part of the country you are from you may shrug at this, but trust me when I say that there was a time (may still be a time) when either of those would disqualify you from being a likely presidential candidate as much as being black would. I did not encounter virtually any anti-Italian racism back in Michigan, but here on the east coast I lived with an Irish guy when I first moved in that told me, in all seriousness "I'm not racist. I love everybody...except for those f***ing w*ps."
I was really confused by this until someone laid out the old Irish/Italian social dynamics here on the east coast. And apparently such feelings are not restricted to the Irish. It always amazes me to what lengths we'll go to find something to dislike about our fellow man.
Next we have Mitt Romney. On the surface, he looks like your typical politician. But he's Mormon. That makes a LOT of my fellow Christians queasy. Mormons get (often unfairly) grouped together with Mormon fundamentalists that marry multiple wives, some of whom may or may not be underage or their cousins, as well as believing in a book that is in addition to the Holy Bible which claims there were incidents of holy importance here in America. Most Christians believe Jesus had the last word on things (and Paul through him) and get worried about anyone who came along after that and claimed they were bringing god's word, be it the Mormon's book or the Koran. For many, voting for a mormon isn't that far off from voting for a muslim. If we were grown ups, neither would be an issue, but we're not all grown up here. Just look at the fuss made over Keith Ellison. And he was just being sworn into Congress. Can you imagine the hysteria if Romney wanted to be sworn in as president on the Book of Mormon?
Then again, Mormon is a religion populated by, for the most part, whites which at one point claimed being black was a curse, so many in America are liable to give it a pass, particularly in the South. We'll see.
Then, of course, we have Hillary Clinton. Despite the fact she'd be fine as president, she has a lot of checks against her. First is the fact that she's a woman. We have all types of silly ideas as to what would happen with a woman president. I've heard statements, from women no less, that they would worry about decisions she made during her menstral cycle for heaven's sake.
And, people consider her cold and bitchy. Of course, when you look at her actual statements, she's no different AT ALL from the attitude of her male senate compatriots. The problem is that most americans aren't willing to judge a woman in power on their job performance alone, like they do a man, but instead judge her on whether she can be a senator AND still someone bake cookies after floor votes. It's a silly standard, but the next time someone tells you Hillary (whom I've met and is as nice a person as you'll meet) is a "cold fish" just pretend what she said was said by a male senator and ask yourself whether we'd make a point of noting how cold he was for saying what she said.
Finally, we get the the most obvious one, Barack Obama. Interestingly, I think, of the group, he and Giuliani are the two most likely not to be hindered as much by biological and religious factors.
Say what you want about the evangelical movement, but they are dead set against being defined as racist. Evangelicals have problems with Obama's more liberal stances, but they've split as a group over him due to his obvious christian influences and statements. It's very much not a matter with race for them, which could exert a power influence over southern voters who would usually never vote for an african american en masse.
Obama has other factors going for him: He's mixed, which can be a sin or a curse depending on what part of the country you are in. He's religious, but liberal, which means that he can draw votes, or lose them, from both extremes of the political spectrum, and he has a good message and charisma, both things Hillary and everyone but Giuliani struggle with.

Is America ready, and will America vote, for any of the four people above? I think it is, and I think they will. The question is this: whose message will rise above the inherent gunshy attitude of the typical white anglo-saxon protestant american voter toward people who are not like themselves?
Then again, maybe that does not matter. If the WASP voter stays divided, as it has during the last elections, into its little various camps, the next president, and future ones as well, may be decided by something else: who speaks the best spanish.

More troops? Unfortunately, yes.

2007-01-11T12:55:00.000-05:00

In general, in recent years, I've found myself agreeing more than disagreeing with Democrats when it comes to policy matters. I tend toward being fiscally conservative, but socially liberal, so right now no party encapsulates my total belief package. My view on government could be summed up as "don't spend more than we give you and leave us the **** alone."
However, I did find myself, to my own surprise, siding with George W. Bush of all people regarding what needs to be done in Iraq.
Trust me, I was as floored as you are.
Last night he put forward a new plan for dealing with Iraq. I doubt it will work, but the principle behind it is sound. There needs to be a surge of troop presence in Baghdad (and the Al- Anbar province) to smother violence there so that the Iraqi government can get on its feet.
Personally, I do not support the war. Oh, I bought into it at first, when I believed that Iraq was working on nukes and all types of other nasty stuff, but like many Americans, when that turned out to be a farce, my support went up in smoke. I feel like we were hoodwinked and bamboozled and the real culprit and danger, Osama bin Laden, has been allowed to skate free while we got mired down in a place we should not have been.
However, we broke it. We have to fix it. And it will hurt us for years to come. It will hurt us economically, politically, socially and knocked us off the moral high horse the U.S. claimed to hold for so many decades. However, we can't run from it. We have to stick things out.
Why? Because it is our responsibility. And, I personally think it will serve as a moral lesson for generations to come that war is serious business and not something you go into lightly, or at all if possible. This administration seemed to have forgotten that at some point. Oh, they gave lip service to the gravity of going to war, but now that we know what they knew and what our intelligence agencies told them, it's clear they did not have a solid footing to commit us to this war.
War is painful, war is destructive, war is death. Those things do not end on the battlefield. Consider Iraq our millstone. We have to bear it to the end not only for the sake of honor and responsibility, but for the simple reason that we've got it coming for sticking our nose in it in the first place. Not to mention the fact that, yes, if Iraq completely collapses we'll have problems there for years to come and eventually would likely have to go back anyway. Might as well do things right now while we're there. Bush will get his due in history for this farce. Of that I'm sure. Let's not make 25 million people pay the price along with him.

Many Democrats and some Republicans have suggested that we need to pull back to show the Iraqi's we're serious about them taking responsibility for their nation. Good policy in general, but it doesn't work in this instance specifically. Why? Because I don't think we can trust al Maliki and the current Iraqi administration as far as we can throw them.
There are shiite and sunni death squads roaming the streets in packs, killing virtually indiscriminately. Too often the shiite death squads are reported to be wearing military and police uniforms when doing their dirt. Also, the cleric Muqtada al Sadr and his Mahdi Army are an open, unabashed shiite militia, tied to numerous deaths and the kidnapping of at least one U.S. soldier. When it came time for us to go into Sadr City (Muqtada's Baghdad stronghold) to find our man, al Maliki turned on us in support of the illegal Mahdi Army.
Here's what I think the reality is in Baghdad and other portions of Iraq:
We've successfully trained and armed a shiite genocide faction in the Middle East.
I think once we withdraw from Iraq there will be a human crisis on the scale of Darfour, Sudan as shiites trained by the U.S. and armed with U.S. weaponry, will massacre the Sunnis. Now, we know there are Sunni factions just as murderous. But you and I know the world will forget all about that when they have a shiite armed with an M-16 on Time Magazine.
And, the shiites are in power. That gives them an advantage, which, when unchecked, could lead to horrific slaughter.
For all our claims to to understand the Shiite/Sunni conflict it still boils down to age-old clan-based animosity. We've seen this fight before.
Montagues v. Capulets.
Hatfields v. McCoys
Earps v. Clantons
Crips v. Bloods.
Ninjas v. Pirates.
When one side gets a distinct advantage over the other, there's a bloodbath.
That's why we have to stay for the time being and calm things down. We need to bring the level of violence there down. That means making some people we call friends mad. It means going into Sadr City, shutting down the Mahdi Army as well as Al Queda in Iraq. It means asking al Maliki's forgiveness instead of begging his permission when we go after shiite deathsquads with political ties. Enough uniforms on the street WILL make a difference, if we are allowed to take the gloves off and not view conflicting certain people as pariah.
Once the situation has calmed down and there are new elections, perhaps a calm, secure Iraqi people will be more inclined to vote in someone who has the whole nation's interests at heart.
The only real difficulty I see will be making sure our people have the latitude they need. The only question is whether 20,000 troops are enough.
I know people want the Iraqis to step up, I do too. But, really, if that were a driving force in the minds of the Iraqis Saddam wouldn't have been in power in the first place.

A Marine's Letter Home

2007-01-03T16:24:00.000-05:00

DL's note: This letter has been circulating the net and other places recently. It is a letter home from an anonymous marine in Iraq. Time Magazine recently verified it's authenticity. I thought it was one of those internet fantasy creations at first. It tells the story of Iraq and the U.S. soldiers there in a way nobody else can. If we are going to learn from this conflict, we have to understand it. A while back I posted a letter from an insurgent. Here's one from a marine for balance, for posterity, and for sake of understanding a little better the whys, hows and who's of a conflict that will be analyzed and studied for a thousand years.

All: I haven't written very much from Iraq. There's really not much to write about. More exactly, there's not much I can write about because practically everything I do, read or hear is classified military information or is depressing to the point that I'd rather just forget about it, never mind write about it. The gaps in between all of that are filled with the pure tedium of daily life in an armed camp. So it's a bit of a struggle to think of anything to put into a letter that's worth reading. Worse, this place just consumes you. I work 18-20-hour days, every day. The quest to draw a clear picture of what the insurgents are up to never ends. Problems and frictions crop up faster than solutions. Every challenge demands a response. It's like this every day. Before I know it, I can't see straight, because it's 0400 and I've been at work for 20 hours straight, somehow missing dinner again in the process. And once again I haven't written to anyone. It starts all over again four hours later. It's not really like Ground Hog Day, it's more like a level from Dante's Inferno.
Rather than attempting to sum up the last seven months, I figured I'd just hit the record-setting highlights of 2006 in Iraq. These are among the events and experiences I'll remember best.
Worst Case of Deja Vu — I thought I was familiar with the feeling of deja vu until I arrived back here in Fallujah in February. The moment I stepped off of the helicopter, just as dawn broke, and saw the camp just as I had left it ten months before — that was deja vu. Kind of unnerving. It was as if I had never left. Same work area, same busted desk, same chair, same computer, same room, same creaky rack, same... everything. Same everything for the next year. It was like entering a parallel universe. Home wasn't 10,000 miles away, it was a different lifetime.
Most Surreal Moment — Watching Marines arrive at my detention facility and unload a truck load of flex-cuffed midgets. 26 to be exact. We had put the word out earlier in the day to the Marines in Fallujah that we were looking for Bad Guy X, who was described as a midget. Little did I know that Fallujah was home to a small community of midgets, who banded together for support since they were considered as social outcasts. The Marines were anxious to get back to the midget colony to bring in the rest of the midget suspects, but I called off the search, figuring Bad Guy X was long gone on his short legs after seeing his companions rounded up by the giant infidels.
Most Profound Man in Iraq — an unidentified farmer in a fairly remote area who, after being asked by Reconnaissance Marines if he had seen any foreign fighters in the area replied "Yes, you."
Worst City in al-Anbar Province — Ramadi, hands down. The provincial capital of 400,000 people. Lots and lots of insurgents killed in there since we arrived in February. Every day is a nasty gun battle. They blast us with giant bombs in the road, snipers, mortars and small arms. We blast them with tanks, attack helicopters, artillery, our snipers (much better than theirs), and every weapon that an infantryman can carry. Every day. Incredibly, I rarely see Ramadi in the news. We have as many attacks out here in the west as Baghdad. Yet, Baghdad has 7 million people, we have just 1.2 million. Per capita, al-Anbar province is the most violent place in Iraq by several orders of magnitude. I suppose it was no accident that the Marines were assigned this area in 2003.
Bravest Guy in al-Anbar Province — Any Explosive Ordnance Disposal Technician (EOD Tech). How'd you like a job that required you to defuse bombs in a hole in the middle of the road that very likely are booby-trapped or connected by wire to a bad guy who's just waiting for you to get close to the bomb before he clicks the detonator? Every day. Sanitation workers in New York City get paid more than these guys. Talk about courage and commitment.
Second Bravest Guy in al-Anbar Province — It's a 20,000-way tie among all these Marines and Soldiers who venture out on the highways and through the towns of al-Anbar every day, not knowing if it will be their last — and for a couple of them, it will be.
Worst E-Mail Message — "The Walking Blood Bank is Activated. We need blood type A+ stat." I always head down to the surgical unit as soon as I get these messages, but I never give blood — there's always about 80 Marines in line, night or day.
Biggest Surprise — Iraqi Police. All local guys. I never figured that we'd get a police force established in the cities in al-Anbar. I estimated that insurgents would kill the first few, scaring off the rest. Well, insurgents did kill the first few, but the cops kept on coming. The insurgents continue to target the police, killing them in their homes and on the streets, but the cops won't give up. Absolutely incredible tenacity. The insurgents know that the police are far better at finding them than we are — and they are finding them. Now, if we could just get them out of the habit of beating prisoners to a pulp... Greatest Vindication — Stocking up on outrageous quantities of Diet Coke from the chow hall in spite of the derision from my men on such hoarding, then having a 122mm rocket blast apart the giant shipping container that held all of the soda for the chow hall. Yep, you can't buy experience.
Biggest Mystery — How some people can gain weight out here. I'm down to 165 lbs. Who has time to eat?
Second Biggest Mystery — if there's no atheists in foxholes, then why aren't there more people at Mass every Sunday?
Favorite Iraqi TV Show — Oprah. I have no idea. They all have satellite TV.
Coolest Insurgent Act — Stealing almost $7 million from the main bank in Ramadi in broad daylight, then, upon exiting, waving to the Marines in the combat outpost right next to the bank, who had no clue of what was going on. The Marines waved back. Too cool.
Most Memorable Scene — In the middle of the night, on a dusty airfield, watching the better part of a battalion of Marines packed up and ready to go home after over six months in al-Anbar, the relief etched in their young faces even in the moonlight. Then watching these same Marines exchange glances with a similar number of grunts loaded down with gear file past — their replacements. Nothing was said. Nothing needed to be said.
Highest Unit Re-enlistment Rate — Any outfit that has been in Iraq recently. All the danger, all the hardship, all the time away from home, all the horror, all the frustrations with the fight here — all are outweighed by the desire for young men to be part of a band of brothers who will die for one another. They found what they were looking for when they enlisted out of high school. Man for man, they now have more combat experience than any Marines in the history of our Corps.
Most Surprising Thing I Don't Miss — Beer. Perhaps being half-stunned by lack of sleep makes up for it.
Worst Smell — Porta-johns in 120-degree heat — and that's 120 degrees outside of the porta-john.
Highest Temperature — I don't know exactly, but it was in the porta-johns. Needed to re-hydrate after each trip to the loo.
Biggest Hassle — High-ranking visitors. More disruptive to work than a rocket attack. VIPs demand briefs and "battlefield" tours (we take them to quiet sections of Fallujah, which is plenty scary for them). Our briefs and commentary seem to have no effect on their preconceived notions of what's going on in Iraq. Their trips allow them to say that they've been to Fallujah, which gives them an unfortunate degree of credibility in perpetuating their fantasies about the insurgency here. Biggest Outrage — Practically anything said by talking heads on TV about the war in Iraq, not that I get to watch much TV. Their thoughts are consistently both grossly simplistic and politically slanted. Biggest Offender: Bill O'Reilly.
Best Intel Work — Finding Jill Carroll's kidnappers — all of them. I was mighty proud of my guys that day. I figured we'd all get the Christian Science Monitor for free after this, but none have showed up yet. [CLARIFICATION FROM THE CHRISTIAN SCIENCE MONITOR: "Regarding the writer's comments about his unit's "Best Intel Work", the Monitor is very grateful for all of the efforts the US government made to secure Jill Carroll's freedom after she was held against her will for 82 days. Monitor Editor Richard Bergenheim expressed his gratitude in a press conference he conducted on the day that the capture of Jill's kidnappers was announced, and Jill directly thanked the men who participated in the operation. Also, the Monitor has offered to send the marine who wrote this letter and his unit 25 gift subscriptions to its weekly international edition."]
Saddest Moment — Having an infantry battalion commander hand me the dog tags of one of my Marines who had just been killed while on a mission with his unit. Hit by a 60mm mortar. He was a great Marine. I felt crushed for a long time afterward. His picture now hangs at the entrance to our section area. We'll carry it home with us when we leave in February.
Best Chuck Norris Moment — 13 May. Bad Guys arrived at the government center in a small town to kidnap the mayor, since they have a problem with any form of government that does not include regular beheadings and women wearing burqahs. There were seven of them. As they brought the mayor out to put him in a pick-up truck to take him off to be beheaded (on video, as usual), one of the Bad Guys put down his machine gun so that he could tie the mayor's hands. The mayor took the opportunity to pick up the machine gun and drill five of the Bad Guys. The other two ran away. One of the dead Bad Guys was on our top twenty wanted list. Like they say, you can't fight City Hall.
Worst Sound — That crack-boom off in the distance that means an IED or mine just went off. You just wonder who got it, hoping that it was a near miss rather than a direct hit. Hear it practically every day.
Second Worst Sound — Our artillery firing without warning. The howitzers are pretty close to where I work. Believe me, outgoing sounds a lot like incoming when our guns are firing right over our heads. They'd about knock the fillings out of your teeth.
Only Thing Better in Iraq Than in the U.S. — Sunsets. Spectacular. It's from all the dust in the air.
Proudest Moment — It's a tie every day, watching our Marines produce phenomenal intelligence products that go pretty far in teasing apart Bad Guy operations in al-Anbar. Every night Marines and Soldiers are kicking in doors and grabbing Bad Guys based on intelligence developed by our guys. We rarely lose a Marine during these raids, they are so well-informed of the objective. A bunch of kids right out of high school shouldn't be able to work so well, but they do.
Happiest Moment — Well, it wasn't in Iraq. There are no truly happy moments here. It was back in California when I was able to hold my family again while home on leave during July.
Most Common Thought — Home. Always thinking of home, of my great wife and the kids. Wondering how everyone else is getting along. Regretting that I don't write more. Yep, always thinking of home.
I hope you all are doing well. If you want to do something for me, kiss a cop, flush a toilet, and drink a beer. I'll try to write again before too long — I promise.

New website!

2006-12-28T19:26:00.000-05:00

Warning: If you're not an RPG gaming geek, run now.
A few months back I started a project called "The Amalgaverse Project" on the Palladium webboards. I promised people I'd put it up on the internet.
It took a while, with everything else going on, but it was a personal project I wanted to complete. It is a work in progress and there are still some gaps to fill, but the lions' share of the work is done.
I ended up going a step further and buying my own domain! I want a site that's easy to find, unique and vibrant. I hope it fits the bill.
So if you like Palladium games, and especially if you like their Robotech and other "space"-based science fiction lines, check out the Super-Nexus, and the Amalgaverse Project therein.

Feast or famine

2006-12-19T08:56:00.000-05:00

I've probably mentioned it before, but the one thing about the writing business that really irks me is the "Feast or Famine" way things seem to work out. Earlier this summer, my calender was an empty desolate wasteland where writing projects dared not rear their heads.
But in August the dam broke and I've been riding this strange wave ever since.
I finished a book in November but am awaiting rewrites from my publisher that I'll have to do. He's swamped with the Christmas season, which has left me on pins and needles. I so badly want to see my name on the spine of a book soon. Last time I talked with him he was saying Spring or Summer. But his company is notorious for running behind, so I'm cautiously optimistic for fall or winter 2007. Well, a lot of that is allegedly due to the authors running behind, but I got him a full manuscript that's not only ready to go but professionally proofread and edited as well (rae is a proofreader at the same financial company I work for and took hours to read through every page). Clean, good copy in about three months. Right at the deadline he asked for. He wants some changes, but that's to be expected. It's the first time we've worked together. The faster he gets them to me, the faster I can see my name on a shelf.
He must have liked it to some degree because he gave me the go-ahead to start working on a second book with another writer. So I've started on that book this month.
On top of that, an old friend of mine who is an artist for an art studio reconnected with me. The studio wants he and I to resurrect an old comic book idea we had. They want some script and pages to look at in a few weeks. The artist has reimagined the project and I've had a couple hundred pages of back story and character profiles to read through....written by an artist who, bless his heart, has great ideas but is not a writer. Fortunately, he's a kick ass artist.
On top of that I've got a smaller project from the same studio that's a collaboration of writer's and artists for a periodical that's put out by the publisher I did the first book for. So that's four concurrent writing projects going at the same time.
This is, of course, on top of a 40-hour a week job editing financial statements for one the top 20 largest accounting firms in the country, which decided to make this month the month they switched over to an entirely new, paperless, document system.
Oh, and as if that weren't bad enough, a friend turned rae and I onto World of Warcraft.
Sleep? What's that?

Makes you wanna swear

2006-12-05T11:27:00.000-05:00

"...no religious test shall ever be required as a qualification to any office or public trust under the United States." -- Article VI, Section 3 of the United States Constitution.

Why is it the people who claim to be the most patriotic, and wave the flag the most, seem to be the most ignorant of the laws, foundations, and motivations of our country?
Sometimes, someone says something so dumb that you have to do a double-take and you try to convince yourself that you misheard it.
While I'm sure such examples crop up by the hour, in this case I'm referring to the outcry at the request of incoming Congressman Keith Ellison, D-Minn. Ellison, a muslim, wants to take his oath of office on the Koran and not the bible. Since he's muslim, and not christian, him swearing in on the bible makes about as much sense as having him sworn in on Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
Seems pretty open and shut, especially given the EXTREMELY specific constitutional statement that there should be no religious test for public office.
But, in a clear case of "stupidity knows no bounds," somebody had to protest, of course.
Among many, that somebody included Dennis Prager, who wrote a column stating that Ellison should not be allowed to swear in on the Koran because it would undermine American civilization.
Prager wasn't the only one, just the loudest. And it's not an issue of "right vs. left" as Prager got slammed by Right-leaning columnists as much as he did by the Left.
If anything, Ellison should be commended. He could have just taken the oath on the bible, but instead, he seems to actually want his oath to mean something.
Prager has backtracked recently, claiming, again erroneously, that it's a matter of the U.S. being based on the bible, making it the country's de facto Holy Document.
But again, he runs into a little brick wall I like to call historical fact.
U.S. Treaty of Tripoli in 1796, near the end of George Washington's last term as president, was intended to outline the nature of the U.S. to foreign countries. It states, in no uncertain words,
"As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion;"
As you know, or should, foreign treaties are ratified by the Senate and signed by the president. They were all Founding Fathers, who had lived through the creation of our nation, headed by the leading figure of our country and it's first president. They agreed that the U.S. was not founded on Christianity.
While there is no doubt that Christianity influenced many aspects of the nation, our Founding Fathers came from an assortment of backgrounds, which included a few deists and a couple in-the-closet atheists. They went through great pains in numerous documents to distinguish that religion shouldn't be a factor in our governmental workings. There are endless reams of quotes from Jefferson, Franklin and Paine, among others screaming at us not to use religion as a measuring stick, standard, or test, for governmental action, influence or dogma.
It's all in writing, all over the place.
When Ellison swears in on that Koran, it won't be an erosion of American values. It will be an affirmation of them.

Of course it's a civil war....

2006-11-29T15:00:00.000-05:00

"War of the Words"

Throughout the week, there's been a big furor over NBC, the Los Angeles Times, and other news outlets deciding that the situation in Iraq can be classified as a civil war.
People think NBC was first, but actually it was the right-leaning Christian Science Monitor that first began calling Iraq a "deepening civil war" months ago. They are the only ones who got it right.
Today, Colin Powell came out directly against the president, according to major news outlets, saying that the conflict in Iraq meets the standard of a civil war. He told CNN's Hala Gorani in Dubai that the Bush Administration should acknowledge that.
When we first went in, Powell allegedly told Bush regarding the war "if you break it, it's yours."
It's broken, but unfortunately it's not just Bush's, it's all ours.
The Bush Administration, sadly but predictably, still denies there's a civil war in Iraq.
National Security Advisor, Stephen Hadley, said on Monday: "You have not yet had a situation...where you have clearly defined and opposing groups vying not only for power but for territory."
He's wrong. There are three.
The Sunni and Shiites are pretty clearly defined groups. They are so defined that they are able to round up random people on the street and sort out the shiites from the sunnis by checking names and I.D. Tell our troops that can't go into Sadr City to look for a kidnapped U.S. soldier that there's no "clearly defined" shiite group. Tell soldiers patroling the Anbar Province, AKA the Sunni Stronghold, that there's no "clearly defined" Sunni group.
And once you cross a line in the north you are no longer in Iraq. The Kurds have declared their territory is Kurdistan, the long-desired Kurdish homeland. At the border to Kurdistan, you are required to remove any Iraqi flags from your vehicle. How much more "clearly defined" does Hadley need the groups to be?
As for defining a civil war, many right-wing bloggers and pundits have whined that the Iraq war is "too complex" to be a civil war.
Oh, NOW they want it to be complex! A month ago it was good vs. evil. Stay the course. Freedom vs. tyranny. What could be simpler? When did they suddenly realize there was nuance?
And when was there a "simple" civil war? Ours? Our civil war was extremely complex. Try going to any large group of people and start a conversation about what the U.S. Civil War was about. Slavery? Economics? Power? It wasn't just North vs. South either, as any resident of Kansas or Missouri who knows their history can tell you. In many cases, rival sects threw on a blue or grey uniform just for the right to settle long-standing differences in their own private little bush wars. Another claim, that since foreign countries are involved it can't be a civil war, also falls pretty flat. There were foreign countries involved in our civil war. Some nations who hoped to see America fall transported arms and supplies to the south, exactly like Iran shipping weapons to the shiites or to hezbollah. No different.
So why the fear of calling it a civil war?
Because it will change the mental dynamics of the war.
Some are calling Matt Lauer's "It's a civil war" declaration a "Cronkite moment."
Many of you may not know what this means.
At one point during the Vietnam War, Walter Cronkite declared, during a broadcast, that the war had become unwinnable.
That idea gelled in the minds of U.S. citizens. They chewed it up, tasted the foul, pungeant flavoring, and then, finally, with great distaste swallowed it.
After that, the conversation changed to how to get out of Vietnam. Retreat with honor.
Unfortunately, Bush has dug us in so deep, so ineptly, and through such dishonorable means and goals, that I am not sure retreat with honor is possible here.
Iraq is a debacle. It's broken, but unfortunately it's not just Bush's, as Powell stated. It's all of ours.
Any tactician will tell you that if you are fighting a battle where you are not gaining any ground, and in fact losing it, it's time to pull back. You're just wasting resources.
Doesn't mean we should leave, but the entire mission over there should change.
I've said two things from the beginning.
1. Iraqis will have a peaceful democracy when Iraqis want it so bad that no one will stand in their way. The Kurds have proved that. They deserve their Kurdistan. Turkey be damned.
2. Iraq will fracture. Today, tomorrow, next month of five years from now, Iraq will divide. It's a fake country constructed by the British after the fall of the last caliphate, just like all those warring nations in Africa. The people there were forced together regardless of a long history or antagonism by European powers who just wanted their natural resources. Iraq is shaped to allow imperial nations to get oil from the rich fields of the north and south into the Persian Gulf. Period. There was no concern for the shiites, sunnis, kurds, persians, arabs, beduin or chaldeans who inhabited the land in their own distinct territories and culture.
At one point, early on, perhaps it could have been saved. But I don't think so at this point.
It's Yugoslavia 2.0 and us forcing them to stay together is only making things worse. We've dropped a big 2 liter of mountain dew and we think if we keep shaking it somehow the pressure will subside. You're going to have to ease that cap off a bit. Perhaps partitioning is a way to do that to let everyone cool down. I don't really know.
What I do know is what we're doing now, losing ground with no clear goals, isn't a strategy for victory in Iraq's civil war.

2006-11-14T07:46:00.000-05:00

Ace of Aces

My second video. Tried to do faster edits this time and keep the pace high and exciting. I also tried to manipulate the footage more to tell the story.

2006-11-12T23:16:00.000-05:00

Into the Black

My first attempt at video editing. Enjoy!

And the winner is....polling!

2006-11-09T09:27:00.000-05:00

All over the blogosphere there are analyses, celebrations and sage "I told you so"s from left-leaning bloogers, and recriminations, disbelief, wailing and gnashing of teeth from right-leaning bloggers. I'm not going to touch much of that, at least not today.
Today, I want to address the real winner of this election cycle: The polls!
Yes, the polls raced to an astounding victory, after 12 years in the wilderness following the 1994 Republican Revolution.
Castigated and cast out, the way to your follower's hearts was perceived, by politicians, to proudly claim, "Just because those polls are scientifically proven doesn't mean their accurate!"
Of course, if you were paying attention, they only made that proclamation when they were down in the polls. That should have been the first clue that they never really stopped watching them like they claimed.
But after disasterous predictions via exit polling in a couple elections, Americans started to listen: "Yeah, those polls are stupid! Phooey on them! The media just makes them up!"
Well, that all came crashing down in flames on the evening of Nov. 7.
Even the exit polls were like statistical heat-seaking missiles slamming into the pulse of America.
CNN was so confident in its exit polling science that it predicted a Cardin win in the Maryland Senate race while Republican challenger Michael Steele was AHEAD in the actual numbers!
That takes guts...or a lot of confidence in your polling methods.
Although most Democrats never claimed to shun polls, Republicans did. This election cycle, however, showed us that usually what a Republican leader protests (like gay sex, drug use, and the exploitation of children) he's usually secretly approves of, or at least does in his own private shame. No surpise then that Republicans, who most often claim to never listen to polls, were outed as poll-lovers during the last days as well. Republicans jumped up and danced when poll numbers showed the Grand Canyon-esque gulf between them and the American voters closing a few points. "We have the momentum!" Ken Mehlman shouted on news shows all over.
Of course, Tuesday night they discovered that the light at the end of the tunnel was actually a train, but they are now officially out of the closet as poll-lovers. They love them some hot polls!
So how did polls come back? Simple. They had to.
Polling places make a lot of money on accurately predicting outcomes and the mood of large numbers of people for their clients. If their poll numbers are inaccurate, then people don't employ them, they don't get paid, and lots of college students don't make this week's beer money by manning phones and standing outside of voting places accosting old ladies wearing those sunglasses from "V". In a restaurant, if your burger sucks, you make a better burger. There's obviously been some revamping of the 'secret sauce' used to cook up poll numbers. Just look at how accurate they were. Most polls said Dems would gain 25-30 seats in the house and and 5-6 seats in the senate. So, how'd that work out for them?
Dead on the money. Dems have 24 seats with 10 races still too close to call two days later. Chances are half of them will go Dem, if not more. As to the 5-6 Senate seat prediction, that was right on the money too, and the "5 or 6" indecision can be explained by how close a couple of those senate races were.
What does this mean for us as voters?
Well, hold onto your margin of error baby, we're going for a ride! There will be polls on everything! Polls on candidates, polls on trends, lifestyles, economics, hell...I predict there will be polls on polls!
2008 is going to be the year of the poll! That entire election is going to be the most massively poll-driven election you've ever seen. Politicians will point to positive poll numbers as proof positive of the position of the American people.
Republicans will cite polls, Democrats will cite polls, libertarians will cite polls, even evangelicals will cite polls.
You'll be overwhelmed with people pointing to polls.
But here's the thing:
They've been doing it all along. And the ones who claimed to never cite polls, they're usually the ones who read them the most.
I'm not sure what the effect on us will be, but I'd say there's a 96% chance it won't be good.
Of course, there's a margin of error there of about +/- 4%....

Facing the faceless

2006-10-26T09:29:00.000-04:00

I'm posting the following article here because it shows something that we do not get to see on this side of things: the political goals, motivations and thought processes of an Iraqi insurgent.
You'll probably be surprised by some of what this guy says, and others are pretty typical. What's interesting to me is that most of us have forgotten that the Baathists who once ruled under Saddam Hussein are the heart of the insurgency. That's what you get when you rush into Baghdad for a photo op without actually stopping to capture the enemy's army. The thing about the Baathists is that they are secular, meaning they do NOT want Islamic law to rule Iraq. Some of them are actually fighting and killing U.S. soldiers because they fear our invasion and presence will lead to a more islamic-based rule, which they see as a bad thing.
I still think anybody planting I.E.D.s on the road and sending in suicide bombers are sick f***s, but I think it benefits us to see how they think and what their true motivations are. If you read this guy carefully, then compare what he says with what Bush and C0. THINK are the issues (such as "freedom" and "democracy", which Bush uses more to give americans a political handjob than actually mean anything real...in my opinion) its easily clear why we haven't won the peace in Iraq: We aren't actually even dealing with the real issues there.
Remember, this is just one faction of the insurgency, but it's from a faction equal to or more powerful than al Queda in Iraq (which is just there to cause trouble for the U.S. and to let Bush pay for live fire training of the next generation of terrorists, they've hated Iraq for years)

Enough blather from me, here's the article, which was taken from Asharq Al-Awsat, a leading international arab newspaper:

Iraqi Insurgent Leader: Premier's Initiative Rejected, Dialogue With US HaltedAsharq Al-Awsat Exclusive23/10/2006
By Ma'ad Fayad
London, Asharq Al-Awsat- A leader of an armed Iraqi group has denied the existence of any dialogue with the current Iraqi Government or US Ambassador in Iraq Zalmay Khalilzad.
The armed leader, who goes by the name Abu-Umar, stated that "resistance factions" have rejected the national reconciliation initiative proposed by Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki, “because it is not a comprehensive plan, and lacks a lot of the objectives for which thousands of Iraqis were martyred."
Regarding dialogue with US Ambassador Khalilzad, which began seven months ago, the field commander told Asharq Al-Awsat in a phone call from an undisclosed location in Iraq, "Yes, we had a dialogue with the Americans, but they cut short these talks although our approach was supported on the political, religious, and popular levels. We would have reached positive results had the dialogue continued. The US Administration, however, ignored our proposals and formed the government without asking our opinion and without our participation. In our latest memorandum to the US ambassador, we told him that the majority of the cabinet members are seekers of [government] posts, and will offer the Iraqi people nothing. We told him that the armed operations will increase and double in number.”
When asked about Prime Minister's Al-Maliki's initiative for national reconciliation, the militant leader said, "This initiative does not entail practical steps to save Iraq, and has nothing to do with what is happening on the ground, especially with respect to the issue of the armed militias that are backed by parties represented in the parliament and the government."
Abu-Umar noted that an area in Baghdad "was bombed with 120[mm] mortar shells by the Muqtada al-Sadr group. We do not call them the Al-Mahdi Army, because imam Al-Mahdi would not send his army to kill the sons of the Iraqi people." He added, "The initiative excludes reconciliation with the Baathist and the resistance factions. It excludes anyone who killed a US soldier, and those whom it called takfiris [Muslims holding fellow Muslims to be infidels]. The initiative protects the armed militias. We do not know who this reconciliation will be with."
Commenting on Iraqi resistance, the faction leader, told Asharq Al-Awsat that, "There is a resistance [movement], which is a real one. The takfiris aside, if the Americans themselves and President Bush admit that there is resistance, why does the Iraqi government not recognize us and talk to us to agree on a timetable for the withdrawal of the foreign forces from the villages, and then from the cities, to their bases and barracks before they withdraw from Iraq? We are not saying that the US forces should withdraw immediately; this is unreasonable. The Iraqi situation is going through serious stages, and it is not part of our strategy to get the Americans out immediately. As I explained, it is also not in the interest of Iraq and the Iraqis that the foreign forces leave the country under these circumstances. However, we are saying that they should set a timetable for their departure after one or two years, more or less. Many Iraqis and resistance factions support this idea. If the US forces announce their intention to withdraw based on timetables, no one will afterward dare attack them."
On resolving the crisis in Iraq Abu-Umar said that, "The US Administration knows full well what we want, and a solution for the crisis of the country is in its hand. We here suggest a repeat of the elections without using the Islamic religion, the sect, or the doctrine in them, that is, separating religion from politics. We do not care if people perform their rites, each according to his religion and doctrine, but we are against using the True Religion [Islam] politically. We suggest canceling the Debathification Act. If the government is not afraid of the Baath [Party], it should allow it to run in the elections, or they should give the Baathist any chance to have representation." He noted that, "the radical Islamic trends, be they Sunnis or Shia, have failed to build the state of the new Iraq, and the Iraqi street is fed up with these ideas."
He added that, "One of our proposals is to form a national salvation government away from sectarian quotas and to depend on a strong statesman like Iyad Allawi, who, although he is Shia and I am a Sunni, showed he is non-sectarian. The man is acceptable to the majority of the resistance factions, the Baathist, the secularists, the nationalists, and the military. We believe that he has a lot of keys for a solution to the crisis. We hear that the Iraqi street wants the return of Allawi to save the country from this tragic situation, especially since he resisted the presence of militias during his tenure, which did not witness what is happening today despite the fact that he did not form his government as he wished. This does not mean that the current government has no competent ministers. These, however, cannot offer anything in light of the current situation. And then [the other proposal is] to prepare for democratic elections under the UN supervision."
Regarding the proposal for establishing an Islamic State and including the Al-Anbar Governorate in it, "The Islamic State plan will not succeed in Iraq; some are promoting this plan to steal more money from Iraq. The government depended on some tribal sides to protect Al-Anbar. This side is known as a money-stealing gang although it works for the security apparatuses."
He admitted that there are, "Sunni militias, but they are there to protect the Sunnis who are in power. The power of these militias does not exceed 5 percent of the power and activity of the Shia militias."
Regarding the Mecca document, Abu-Umar said, "We respect Sheikh Harith al-Dari, are proud of his ideas, and trust his policies and his signing of this important document. If, however, the provisions of this document are not implemented and the Iraqi street does not feel it, it will not be adopted. We, the Iraqis, are one nation. I do not want to use a sectarian language. There are no Sunnis or Shia, but rather Iraqis, whether Muslims or non-Muslims. The sectarian confrontations in Iraq were planned by radical Sunnis and Shia. We strongly reject calling the Shia brothers infidels, and we also reject the murder of Sunnis at the hands of Shia militias. Today, the victims are from both sides and from the Christians as well. This is unacceptable and very painful. The political blocs should reach an agreement to stop the armed operations. If these operations actually stop, this means that these blocs, or some of them, are responsible for these operations. If they do not, then this means the government is weak and unable to control the situation, and therefore it should step down. We believe that the government is indeed weak and unable to control the situation."
The field commander admitted that there is coordination among the armed factions. He said, "The real resistance does not inflict harm on any Iraqi civilian, even if that costs us the loss of a US target." He divided the axes of the resistance, in order of importance, as follows: The Baath Party Organizations; the Islamic resistance movement, which includes several factions; and the Mujahidin Shura Council (Al-Qaeda) and its strong factions. There are also other unconnected factions, which are not acting under a unified leadership, but which are very influential in their areas. Some of them are identified, such as the Islamic Army, the Mujahidin, Ansar Al-Sunnah, and Jaysh Muhammad.
On the announcement by Vice President Tariq al-Hashimi about his dialogue with the resistance factions, the field commander said, "He may have possibly talked to one of the factions of the Islamic Army, which is divided into three groups. One of these groups coordinates with the Islamic Party."
On the call by some Sunni tribes for the return of Saddam Hussein, he explained that, "This call is undoubtedly spearheaded and supported by the Baath Party organizations. I believe that if they today offer Saddam Hussein to return to power, he will refuse. Besides, he is today incapable of leading Iraq. We believe that the case of Saddam will be part of a comprehensive solution for the Iraqi question."

I'm sure evangelicals could find a shelter...

2006-10-16T20:04:00.000-04:00

Like Urkel in a Tyson fight, the blows just keep landing and landing and landing.Today, news hit about a book written by David Kuo, former deputy director of the Faith-Based Initiative, "Tempting Faith" in which Kuo says that White House workers rolled their eyes and called evangelicals and conservative religious leaders "nuts" after giving them hugs and support and openly scorned them and used them for political value.Says Kuo, "National Christian leaders received hugs and smiles in person, and then were dismissed behind their backs and described as 'ridiculous,' 'out of control' and just plain goofy. The leaders spent much time lauding the president, but they were never shrewd enough to do what Billy Graham had done three decades before, to wonder whether they were being used. They were.”
Kuo points out how easy it was for Bush and his administration to manipulate the evangelicals. Of course, coming three weeks before an election where Republicans only hope is the evangelical vote, this book is a kick straight in the political nads. But what I find more fascinating, is the reaction by evangelical leaders.Everyone else inside the Beltway pretty much snoozed at this announcement. It wasn't a surprise to anyone who knows how Washington works. But evangelicals rushed to defend Bush, and, without knowing what happened, and despite the fact that Kuo wanted the White House to be MORE Christian and focus MORE on faith-based initiative, they claim Kuo must have turned sides to the liberals and is just plain lying.The reaction reminded me of something, and it took a while for me to figure out what it was: an abused wife.If you've ever seen testimony from an abused wife being confronted about her husband's violent behavior, it has the same feel that the response from evangelical leaders to these new revelations has.Focus on Family, for example, called Kuo's descriptions "mischaracterizations" despite the fact that they have no information about what he did or didn't hear, and they certainly weren't in the White House behind the scenes. Pat Robertson also came out, saying the claims "did not compute" and deriding them.It sounds so familiar, and so sad."No, officer, he didn't hit me. I believe him when he says those panties are his sisters'."It's sad, but the proof is enough to have any doctor pull the patient aside for a heart-to-heart. Bush dropped support for actually funding the Faith-based Initiative once the issue got conservatives into the voting booth. He rallied evangelicals on the gay amendment issue, then dropped it one week after the 2004 election results. He only put forward a more conservative Supreme Court candidate after a huge cry from conservatives over his first pick. Kind of like the husband apologizing after the wife starts to call the police. "Hey, baby, I just get emotional, that's all..."But while evangelical leaders, like an abused wife, may think this is the best man they can find and they should take a few licks when they burn the meatloaf, I'm not so sure the average voter thinks so. Not saying that they'll suddenly vote democrat, but when election day comes, a lot of evangelicals are going to find it hard to stomach coming out of the voting booth claiming they "just fell down the stairs."

The problem with the national "conversation"

2006-10-02T20:51:00.000-04:00

Okay, here's the thing that really irks me about the national political conversation, or lack thereof. We really don't, as a country, seem to care as much about progressing as we do about our "side" being right. It doesn't matter what party you belong to, even if it's a third party. I'm going to use the Foley incident ONLY because it is the most recent. There are examples from all sides. Foley has horrible conversations with underage boys. Everybody castigates him, because that is what is expected of them. Then the politicking begins. Republican bloggers and pundits are trying to change the focus to 1. suspicion about the timing of the release of the information, and 2. claims of hypocrisy on the part of the Dems. Dems, nowhere near guiltless, don't wait for even the tiniest scrap of evidence or investigation before it's a "cover-up" and somehow Foley's actions are a reflection on the entire Republican Party. And no matter what they do, if you support a Third Party, any action they take are the signs that it's time for them to go. We seem to have totally given up on listening to the other side. What's worse, the drive for our side to be right, and our side to "win" overrides the general concern for the well-being of America. Democrat, Republican, Independent, you, your friend, me. We're all responsible for a serious breakdown in the national dialogue. We get immediately defensive when a member of the party we support gets in trouble. We try to "flip the script" on the other side. If someone criticizes Bush, someone invokes Clinton, no matter how irrelevant it is. If someone criticizes Kerry, someone immediately points out all the Bush incidents of alleged "flip-flopping." We do it under the guise of "I'm concerned about the welfare of my country" but in truth most of us do it because we want our side to come out smelling like roses, even if our side is no side. How do we fix it? I really don't know. But we need to acknowledge it. A friend once introduced me to a great quote that I had not encountered before: "The first thing you should do when you find yourself in a hole is to stop digging." How do we get Americans to put down the shovel?

Back in the Life

2006-09-24T11:17:00.000-04:00

So, last night rae and I attended a fetish flea market and play party in D.C. It's been the first time in a while we went out and mingled with others in the lifestyle. Of course, my friend Vox next door and all our friends are in the lifestyle, so we are frequently among people like us, but this was the first time since about the start of summer that we attended a social event.
The Crucible throws these fetish flea markets and play parties about twice a year, and generally we make both of them.
The first half of the day is a big vendor's shop, with every type of BDSM accoutrements' that you can imagine. Corsets, whips, floggers, bondage restraints, jewelry, clothing, artwork, DVD's...You name it. If it's kink, it's probably there. Unless, of course, you are like me and have been saving up for one specific thing that you want. Then it's not there.
You see, I went to the Flea Market for one real reason: To buy a violet wand set. My last set was taken by my last slave without me knowing it. Something I'm still more than a little steamed about. Then, she claims, when she went to send it back to me it fell off the car and shattered. In return, she paid some bills that I was otherwise going to pay. But since then I've wanted a new set, of course. Violet wands are one of my specialties, one of the things I am known for in the scene.
For those who do not know, violet wands are electrical play devices. There's the "wand" itself, and various glass attachments that glow violet when the wand is turned on, kind of like those bulbs you put your hands on at gifts shops where the little rays are attracted to your fingertips. However, whenever you touch someone with the wand they receive a jolt of static electricity, like when you touch a doorknob after petting the cat. The difference is that with the wand it's constant and not just a zap. Different attachments give different types of shocks, and what's more, you can use a body contact to charge yourself, and everything you touch gets zapped, and everything conductive you pick up will become charged. So run your fingers along your lover's spine and they get a constant tingly zap. You can imagine the other areas you can touch.
I'm so adept with it that I've given demos at scene events, like at Vox's Heaven and Hell masquerade ball. I charge myself and use things like samurai swords and gently draw the edge along my slave's skin. The sword transmits the charge, and it feels like she's being cut (the smaller the edge, the sharper the intensity of the zap, so you can imagine what the fine edge of a katana can do...Interestingly, I'm the only one I've seen use a sword like that).
But I've digressed.
SO I went to the flea market to buy one thing: A violet wand set. Now, they aren't cheap. You are lucky if a starter set of just the wand and a couple attachments can be found for $300. And I want something deluxe. Last time we went there were at least three different dealers with three different models. So why is it this time when we go there's......NOT A SINGLE ONE.
I mean, c'mon, I've heard of Murphy's Law, but that is ridiculous.
After quite a bit of searching I found a place that sold them, but didn't have any with them. They only had one at the shop and it was a pretty deluxe kit, but it was on sale. So I forked over 5 benjamins, and they'll send it to me this week.
We also got our photos taken by a professional fetish photographer. Nothing wild, just portraits together that he's going to send us prints of.
Afterwards, we dolled up and went to the play party.
I ran into a lot of old friends, met a few new people as well, and caught up with the happenings in the lifestyle. There are a lot of upcoming events I want to go to, not the least of which is BR2006, the largest lifestyle event on the east coast. Hopefully rae and I will make a few of them.
After some waiting, we got an open station and got to play. Won't go into details on that...hehehe.
But much, much later, we came across a unique device. This guy was giving demonstrations of a vacuum bed.
Here's how it works: You get into this latex bag, more or less, and then a vacuum pump sucks all the air out (your head, of course, is free) until it becomes formfitting. Rae wanted to try it and found it a very interesting, actually calming, experience. I watched, and every time I see it I keep thinking it looks like Han Solo when he got frozen in carbonite.
Even though I've been really busy lately, I'd like this to be the first instance of a steady return to the lifestyle. And I can't wait til I get my wand set in the mail.....neither can Rae.

Feast or Famine

2006-09-16T09:12:00.000-04:00

One of the frustrating things about being a writer is the way work comes at you. It's always either feast (meaning a lot of work all at once) or famine (meaning none at all). It seems to be really hard to get a happy medium going. When I first went freelance and landed a contract with cigar magazine, everyone was contacting me with offers, many of which I had to turn down simply because I did not have the time. For about a year I was living pretty high on the hog, with lucrative freelance contracts that were, in truth, pretty easy.
Eventually, it dried up. Nothing. Nada. It was rough. So I had to take a 9-to-5 (ugh).
Now, things are looking up. I've got a book deal with a company I've always wanted to work for...but associated with that deal has come four different, live, projects, through various avenues all at once.
I've told everyone which one is my priority, but it's still quite the load.
But this time I'm trying to do it differently. By staggering them out over time I, hopefully,won't fall into another feast or famine situation.
It's inspired me to go back into freelancing full time, but I'm going to hold off on that for the time being.
Here's hoping there's no famine in my future.

Birthday swag

2006-09-07T00:11:00.000-04:00

Well, Tuesday was my birthday. I know a lot of you did not know, but I really don't tend to make that big a deal out of it. In fact, the older I get the less a deal I like to make of it. I doubt I'm very different in that regard than most people.
I'm now 33 years old. Looking back, I can't say I'm dissatisfied with the way things have gone, except my attempts at matrimony. However, being in a wonderful relationship now really takes the edge off those regrets.
Career wise I'm pretty happy with what I accomplished. I hit most of my major goals in the time I wanted to hit them. My last major goal, becoming a published author, is closer than ever. Sure, I imagined crazy stuff like getting a Pulitzer or a Hugo before I was 30, but I was too busy experiencing life in a wider spectrum to be that focused. As it is, my friends tend to think of me as a pretty focused guy. Oftentimes, among family and friends, I'm viewed as the "successful one" I think.
Sure, I have the usual amount of trepidation about getting older, but who doesn't? I am feeling the biological clock ticking away, however, and more and more I'm thinking about creating some mini-mes to make sure the human populace is sufficiently traumatized once I'm gone.
However, all that's minor. What's really important is....

BIRTHDAY SWAG BABY!

I made out like a fat rat! Best year I've had in at least the last 10 years. First, I got a 2 gig iPod nano from Rachael, which I'm sure she already regrets, as those little ear buds will have to be surgically removed from my head if I keep them in any longer. It has a 500 lbs capacity and it's not even the size of my old zippo.
Then, a good friend of mine, Vox, got me a new daisho set (katana and wakazashi, samurai swords for the uninitiated). Now, I have a half dozen already, but not like these. These were made in Japan the old fashioned way, folded steel, ray skin covered hilt, full tang. If you've ever held the typical katana you can buy anywhere, and then held a real one....man, the difference is trippy. Firstly, these have a LOT more mass to them than my other more decorative swords. But when you wrap your hand around the hilt, man I can't describe the difference. It's night and day. The only draw back is that apparently the guy who makes these in Japan won't sharpen them. SO it's not just that the sword is not sharp, the edge is actually flat. Someone told me it has something to do with Japan not making weapons after WWII due to it's constitution, but I didn't realize that would apply to swords.
On Monday, we went to the Renaissance Festival, where I got a pair of stainless steel daggers, with stainless steel sheaths and hilts. One hilt is carved into the likeness of Isis, the other, Osiris. The full-metal construction not only makes them very pretty, but also makes them really useful for electrical play with a violet wand kit, since they'll conduct a charge from wherever I hold them.
In addition to that, there's a shop at the Rennfaire called the Brass Dragon, that sells these dragon scultpures out of beaten brass and whatnot. Very beautiful and very expensive. I got a black and gold dragon pendant. It's gorgeous, and rachael is making me a chainmail necklace to wear it with.
On top of that, I snagged the "Super Dimensional Fortress Macross: Do You Remember Love -- Perfect Edition" DVD off Ebay for a buck. A gift to my self.
Christmas will be hardpressed to top that!

signs, signs..everywhere signs

2006-08-28T21:04:00.000-04:00

Not sure if this is a local phenomenon or something national, but here in Maryland I've noticed an interesting trend in political signs on the runup to this November's election. The Republicans are not announcing their party on their campaign signs. I was driving around a few days ago and it hit me that neither Ehrlich nor three other Republicans running for office in Maryland put the fact that they were Republicans on their campaign signs.
I thought at first that it might just be a general trend for this election among both parties, but every Democrat's sign I saw clearly marked that they were Democrats.
Why is that?
Usually something is omitted from a campaign sign because the candidate does not want potential voters to think about that fact. In this case, the Republicans seem to be afraid to remind voters that...well, that they are Republicans. The Democrats, however, do not have the same fear.
Now, this could be a Maryland phenomenon, because Maryland (despite having a Republican Governor) grows more and more a Blue State each election. Ehrlich is hanging by a thread, and Republicans running for local offices are already expecting to catch part of the Bush Backlash. But this is the first time I've seen a party act in a manor that indicates they believe their very party affiliation is a detriment...so it's better if voters don't think about it.
That's pretty profound, and may be rather telling about what Republicans are expecting in November.
I'd be interested to hear from others in other parts of the country to see if they are observing the same phenonemon.
Intersting side note, there's one Democrat in Maryland that has a billboard up of him standing next to Hillary Clinton....he's using his association with Hillary as a selling point. That means that strategists have detected a groundswell in part of the public that actually believes aligning yourself with Hillary will be positive for your campaign. That's very interesting indeed.
Sound off about signs in your area, tell me what you see.

The mental castration of the American male

2006-08-18T19:36:00.000-04:00

One of my big pet peeves is what I call the castration of the American male. By this, I mean the penchant in our society for the last, oh, 20 years, to portray everything that is intrinsically male to be negative attributes that need to be cast off.
You can see it everywhere you go; on television, in books and in movies, everything men have a natural bent for is cast in a negative light. On commercials, you see the classic couple, the bumbling, clueless husband, and the condescending, smart wife who "tolerates" his foolery.
Yet nobody seems put out by it. And people wonder why men's values are so all over the map these days.
I think that we would find, if we were to cease the constant assault on the American male psyche, that perhaps men's natural instincts aren't as bad as we are constantly told it is.
For millions of years, being male seemed to work just fine. I really don't think all of our natural urges suddenly became irrelevant.
We ARE naturally competitive. That is behind our drive to achieve, to strive to be better, to be something greater than our parts.
Socially, the drive to be the best is being doused. Everyone gets a trophy these days after the little league game. Everyone's kid has their own bumper sticker about their kid doing such and such at school. But you can't douse a million years of instinct. And when you deny that part of a young man, you don't squash it, you just force it to come out in other ways....ways you as a parent no longer have control over.
You get bullies, delinquents, and boys who grow up having no concept of being able to direct their natural instincts toward something positive...because we tried to deny those instincts' existence.
Of course men want to collect the most "toys." That comes from eons of instincts of providing for their family. Try to squash that, and what you get is men who still have the urge, but no direction. SO when your husband spends the check on a new DVD player instead of something necessary for the household, that's why.
Yes, men are sexually agressive creatures. No, you can't control that for long. Does that mean they are naturally unfaithful? No. It means that when a wife or girlfriend tries to control him via sex, eventually his instincts will kick in and he'll get it from somewhere else. And the better the man, the more opportunities for that "somewhere else" there will be. Hen peck him, and eventually he'll explode.
But usually by the time the American male is maried it's too late. It starts at birth. It starts with parents today jumping on their son for demonstrating natural male instincts without providing another outlet. Yes, you should stop him from beating up another kid in the sandbox and teach him why it's wrong. But that's where most parent's stop. You need to find another outlet for them.
The bitter irony of it all is that women probably suffer more from the castration of the American male than the men do. More and more unsatisfied with their men, but don't know why. Cosmo is telling them everything they do is fine (while also telling them they neeed to lose weight they couldn't possibly lose) and everything you do is wrong. When they get you to see things their way, they can't figure out why they're so irritated with you.
I see couples like this all the time, and it's like nails on a chalkboard.
There's nothing intrinsically wrong with being a man. It's what you were born to be.

Dark Lord's Otakon Report

2006-08-09T18:22:00.000-04:00

Every year about this time, Baltimore suffers an invasion of it's inner harbor. Ninjas, pirates, sailor scouts, robots, and lots of guys with spikey hair and really big swords converge by the thousands on the Baltimore Convention Center. It's Otakon, as in Otaku, a Japanese word for Japanese pop culture geeks. Anime, manga, J-pop music, martial arts movies and the like are all ingested, sold, packaged, previewed, emulated, discussed, and in some cases outright worshipped, in large doses. This was my first time attending Otakon, and so, I took my camera. The whole thing lasted three days, Friday through Sunday, but I only went Friday night and Saturday. the Convention Center is huge, two massive, multi-story buildings, and it can be murder on your feet. Friday, I really went for the atmosphere. There were at least six video rooms showing anime constantly, or live action flicks from Japan. There were also several panels focusing on various aspects of Japanese culture, such as one I sat in on that discussed Nieczche's philosophy as demonstrated by the characters in Trigun. At night the films and panels got more and more risque, however. I saw one panel advertised as a "Do it yourself bukkake" panel. I decided to duck that one. So the first day I got a good measure of the place, took lots of pictures and watched lots of subtitled original Macross episodes. I also tried to get a handle on this whole Naruto thing. Because, let me tell ya, there was no escaping it. Everywhere you looked there were little Naruto Ninjas, alone and in clusters, in corners fighting with the wrappers of new DVDs or trying to chat up one of the countless roving bands of 4'11" tall 80 lbs asian girls in Sailor Moon outfits. I finally caught a few minutes of it. Looks to me like DBZ, but with newer animation. I just never got into shows where a fight took three episodes, two of which were the opponents talking and "powering up."
There were also a ton of pirates. Ninjas....pirates...in the same place?!?! You KNOW there was gonna be trouble. It all boiled over Friday night when the DJ started spinning techno/anime remixes in the main hall. The ninjas and the pirates faced off in a "You Got Served" style dance battle that was highlighted by two Naruto ninjas actually knowing how to break dance and then being countered by the crew of One Piece, headed by Jack Sparrow, doing the River Dance. I knew you wouldn't believe me. So I got pictures.

After that and a few panels and videos, I called it a night, returning early saturday morning to try and get in on some of that dealer room action.
How big was the dealer room? Well they said it was large enough that you could launch an F-16 from it. Not only were all the big heavies of the anime biz there, but there were countless video game dealers, anime booths, clothiers, artists, model and toy dealers and lots and lots of swords. I got myself some DVDs of some older stuff that I only had on VHS, bought two new swords and some art and then spent a good chunk of time in the massive video game center.
Kudos to the organizers for this. They carted in at least two dozen large plasma screen televisions, then filled them with everything from brand new DBZ and Narutu fighting games that weren't even translated from Japanese yet, to old classics like Street Fighter II Alpah, Tekken III and Samurai Showdown, as well as many non-fight games. I waxed some guys with my never flagging Chun Li skills and then got schooled by dudes doing crazy ridiculo naruto moves (I think I finally decided to give it up when someone did a super move that appeared to steal my soul...).
I was going to stay for another night of panels and dance music, but by then I was bushed. Also, I had just about had my fill of the Otaku crowd. While I definitely have my geek attributes, I'm nothing compared to some of these people. Most are cool, but there are some that I just can't understand how they function in society outside of their Otaku world. Some of them, obviously, don't.
Case in point, on Friday night when the dealer room closed, there was a massive traffic jam at the steps leading out, with people crowded in pretty tight. Fortunately, everyone had made sure to use their Right Guard that morning. I made a crack about the bad planning, and a girl in line behind me said "LOL". no, she didn't laugh out loud.
She.
Said.
The.
Letters.
L-O-L.
When you begin speaking in internet anagrams, it's time to unplug and maybe take in a ball game...or something.
Overall, I found out that there were 25,000 people in attendance over the course of those three days. I had blast. If you're into anime, manga or the like, this is a lovefest you just can't miss.
You've got a year to prepare. See you there.
Oh, and because I love ya...here's more pix, mostly sexy cosplay girls.

Five films you probably haven't seen (but should)

2006-07-28T12:05:00.000-04:00

For lack of a more riveting topic, and a desire to escape from the political/BDSM/personal roller coaster my posts have been on, I decided to to tackle something a little more light-hearted. These are five films that you may not have seen, but that you should. It also probably tells you a lot about me. If, because of this, you go out and see one or more, let me know what you think. This is a pretty eclectic mix. Some were controversial, others accepted masterpieces. They are in no particular order.

1. American Beauty (1999). Directed by Sam Mendes. Starring Kevin Spacey, Annette Benning, Thora Birch and Mena Suvari. Spacey stars as Lester Burnham, a man who wakes up one day to realize that he's pretty much been dead for the last several years. He is awakened from his stupor by the beauty and allure of his daughter's young friend. At the same time, his wife is struggling through her obsession with success, and his daughter has fallen for the "weird guy" drug dealer next door. Now, I've noticed that different people gravitate toward different storylines in this movie. I've heard people have a lot of sympathy for Lester, a lot of people relate to his daughter, and even a few relate to his wife. Personally, I find the core story of Burnham's reawakening to be the most endearing. The interplay between he and Mena is amazingly realistic. You watch enrapt at his transition from stuttering dud of a husband overwhelmed by this youthful siren into someone who has rediscovered his manhood, and only then does Mena's myriad of vulnerabilities and insecurities bubble to the surface. For some reason I don't empathize with his daughter as much as others do. I'm not a big fan of Wes Bently's "deep" drug dealer character. He's a bit overdone and I just never warmed up to him.

2. Exotica (1994). Directed by Atom Egoyan. Starring David Hemblem and Mia Kershner. Of all the films on this list, this is most likely the one you haven't seen. Surreal, startling and at times, disturbing, this film explores the intricate connections between an exotic dancer, a custom inspector who seems obsessed with her, her Deejay boyfriend, and the death of the inspector's daughter at the hands of a serial killer years ago. It is an amazing film, full of depth and nuance. There is so much of this film that's a surprise that it's hard to talk about it without giving some away. It explores sensuality in ways that most films wouldn't dare touch. And at the end, the director somehow gets you to sympathize, quite understandably, with the strange, voyeuristic pervert. You probably haven't seen this film. You probably should.

3. The Killer (1989). Directed by John Woo. Starring Chow Yun-Fat. The perrenial Hong Kong "two gun" action movie, this film is the first John Woo movie that caught the eye of American action movie fans. It details the efforts of a retiring assassin (Yun-Fat) to get the money he's owed for his last hit, in order to pay for an eye operation on a woman he accidentally blinded. The movie is brutal, unforgiving, wonderfully stylistic, and somewhere, admist the hail of bullets and bodies hitting the floor, even manages to show it has a big heart. Beware, however, the ending led to my friends and I dubbing this film the ultimate anti-date movie. Honorable mention goes to Hardboiled, which stars virtually the same cast, but casts Yun-Fat as a hardcore detective. Note that The Killer might also be found under the titles "Blood of Two Heroes" (the direct translation of the title from Chinese) or "Just Heroes" (the title it was released under in Australia).

4. Secretary (2002). Directed by Steven Shainberg. Starring James Spader, Maggie Gyllenhaal, and Lesley Ann Warren. Can't say enough good about this film, especially as someone in the Dominance/submission lifestyle. Daring, sexy, and unpredictable, Maggie Gyllenhaal plays a timid, disturbed young woman who goes to work for a domineering attorney, discovering that her "problems" stem from an unrealized submissive streak. However, she has to convince Spader's uptight attorney to continue what he's started once he begins questioning his choice of lifestyle. I love this film because it is a bdsm love story that is never, ever ashamed of itself. You watch Maggie's character blossom into sexuality and confidence, from stumbling, sniffling and drawn in to strutting to her Master's office with her arms cuffed to a spreader bar and the day's mail in her mouth looking like she could rule the world. Emotionally, it's very realistic for both the main characters, as well as the responses of friends and family. Even if you have no interest in the lifestyle, it's a good flick. If you ever wanted to know a bit of how D/s couples interact and feel, it's a good example (though there is no 'typical' couple). And if you are a couple...well, most couples have trouble finishing this movie in one sitting...

5. War in the Pocket (1989). Directed by Fumihiko Takayama. My one anime entry into this list. War in the Pocket is an offshoot of the Mobile Suit Gundam series, and focuses on the adventures of a young boy during the One Year War, which is the baseline story for all things Gundam. Living on a neutral space colony, Al falls in with a Zion pilot (who most people consider the "bad guys") who is on a secret mission to destroy a secret weapon hidden on the colony illegally by the Federated Earth forces. During it all, Al learns that war isn't as nearly as fun as he thought it was. Get the subtitled version, the dubbed version is sucked dry of any real, believable emotion in the voice casting. The subtitled version's ending gives most people a lump in their throat, and might require you to have a box of tissue handy.

Israel losing war on both fronts

2006-07-21T08:35:00.000-04:00

Over the last week we have been inundated with images, sounds and details of Israel's retaliation against Hezbollah. There's a daily tally of death and blood which, although a mere shadow of the carnage still going on in Iraq, has come to dominate the headlines. But despite the massive military superiority and asymmetrical bodycount, it appears to be a war Israel is losing.
Make no mistake, this is a war. It's an escalation of a war that's been raging for decades since the re-establishment of Israel. At stake is who will both live and prosper along a fertile, strategic, religiously important piece of the Holy Land.
First, it should be noted that Israel is completely justified in its assault on Hezbollah. If someone were to scurry across the US border, kill three soldiers and kidnap two others, we'd go apeshit. We wouldn't even show the restraint Israel has shown. That country would be a self-lighting, glass parking lot.
So, this isn't a "Israel shouldn't be defending itself" rant. Just like any nation, it should.
That being said, sometimes you can't judge success by the amount of carnage or the body count. By real world measures, Hezbollah is winning, and Israel is helping them.
First, Hezbollah is winning militarily.
This one might be the hardest for people to believe, what with the body counts on CNN. However, consider the amount of resources Israel is expending and consider the results those efforts are garnering. Yesterday, Israel reported dropping 23 tons of bombs on Hezbollah. Shortly afterward, Hezbollah representatives basically said "nyah, nyah! You missed us!" and Israel racks up some more images of dead Arab babies for the world to ponder. Israeli fighter planes, most likely Israeli variants of F-15E Strike Eagles and and F-16 Fighting Falcons, are making dozens of sorties over southern Lebanon. Any idea how much it costs every time you launch one of those puppies? Let's not talk about maintenance and manhours, just consider how much you're spending at the gas tank. Now imagine more expensive gas, tanks hundreds of times larger, and expending that gas and having to refill after a mission of only minutes. Now multiply that amount by the number of planes Israel is putting in the air every day. Hezbollah is responding with hundreds of rockets at the cost of perhaps a couple thousand dollars (at most...and that's really pushing it) per rocket and gas for a fleet of jeeps...when their guys aren't on foot. Reports indicate that Israel hasn't done any real damage to Hezbollah so far (though they've done plenty to Lebanon itself). They've dropped a few bridges and buildings, but this is a terrorist organization that is not a static government. Were the Israelis doing this to Syria, then Syria would be hurting. But Hezbollah is a different animal entirely. These are the guys who blew the Marine barracks in Beirut back in the 80s. You know who the driver was? A 15 year old girl. Security cameras caught her smiling as she drove her explosive-laden vehicle into a barracks full of U.S. marines. How much did it cost us to train those marines? How much did it cost them to train and equip a 15 year old girl to blow themselves up (cost to their souls notwithstanding)?
You cannot fight terrorists with large troop concentrations, armies, and carpet (or even precision) bombing. Israel should have learned this by now. They've been "precision" bombing terrorists in the occupied territories for years now. You've seen it on the news. The stories where Ahmed Assabin or whatever was targeted by a missile, but the casualty report indicates he got away, one of his bodyguards was wounded, but three Palestinian kids had to be scrapped off the cement with a squeegee?
That's not really helping Israel very much.
Raw military force isn't the answer, and it isn't going to help the Israelis protect themselves. This war is about the winning of hearts and minds, which brings us to the next front Israel is losing on.
There have been three faces representing each of the "aggrieved parties" in this little shindig recently; Ehud Olmert, PM of Israel; Sheik Hassan Nasrallah, leader of Hezbollah; and Lebanese Prime Minister Fuad Sinora.
Ehud Olmert, despite the fact that he genuinely has the right to defend Israel against terrorist attacks such as the ones Hezbollah committed which sparked this mess, has come off to many as a slavering attack dog. True or not, he harkens back to the old Israeli "hardliner" political stereotype which did nothing but make the situation in the Middle East worse. Recently, Olmert said "Even if last WednesdayÂs criminal attack against an IDF patrol was carried out without the consent of the Lebanese government and without the assistance of its military, this does not absolve it of full responsibility for the attack which emanated from its sovereign territory. Just as the fact that the Chairman of the Palestinian Authority opposes terrorism against Israel does not relieve him and the Palestinian Authority of their responsibility for the attack carried out from their territory against our soldiers in Kerem Shalom. They are both fully responsible for the safety of our soldiers who were taken hostage."
By making statements that Lebanon can be held responsible for Hezbollah, when the whole world knows the Lebanese army doesn't have the power (and Israel would not want them to have the power) to wrest the region from Hezbollah, degrades his other arguments. He makes the same statements about the Palestinian territory. We all know the Palestinian legitimate government doesn't have the resources to root out terrorists, esp. when so many of them have the consent of the people. What's more, Israel is destroying the very infrastructure that would make rooting those forces out possible. Good intentions, bad strategy. And on top of it, he helps characterize his country as maddog killers who are just looking for a reason to "punish"Muslimss, no matter what their affiliation. One gets the impression that Olmert and the Israeli government follows the "they all look alike" tactic. If it's anArabb, they're a bad guy, and complicit with the actions of all.
This, of course, plays right into the terrorists hands. It's a wonderful recruitment tool. Olmert should ask for a percentage. All Hezbollah has to do is trot out Israel's extremist opinion to get recruits for their own.
In sharp contrast are the leaders of Lebanon and Sinora. Sinora is set, despite the horrendous damage being done to his country, to come out of this politically as a winner. He's portrayed himself as intelligent, peace-loving, and truly concerned about his people. He was the very first to call for a cease-fire, forcing Israel to reject an overture at peace, villifying themselves even more. This worked because he truly doesn't have control over Hezbollah, and his people are the ones being zipped up in body bags. What's more, the world has watched Lebanon rebuild itself after a terrible civil war. They've played by the rules, are not open to extremist thought and action (as a government) and even has taken a hard stance against Syria's meddling. They've lined themselves up as an ally in Bush's "War on Terror." To the rest of the world, that appears to have had no currency with Israel, who seems deadset on knocking Lebanon back down into the morass it just pulled itself out of. Not that Israel has much choice in the matter. They have to stop the rocket attacks and defend their territory. But was there no other option than this?
There was no attempt at diplomacy, or how about gathering intelligence and then committing a surgical rescue strike? If Mossad can't do that, who can?
The bombing gives the appearance that Israel is unconcerned about their soldiers' safety, and are using this event as a pretext to knock Hezbollah down a few rungs. Sinora looks like an honest man caught in the middle, and pleading for peace.
Now let's look at Hezbollah's leader and mouthpiece. After the rants of the likes of Osama Bin Laden and Zarqawi cutting off people's heads on tape, this guy looks like a saint.
First, he sidesteps ALOT of the more wild rhetoric. None of that "the streets will run red with zionist blood" or any of that garbage. This guy talks like he has a cool head, a tactical awareness of the situation, and some common sense. Check out his comments in an article today in CNN. First, he opens up by APOLOGIZING to the families of twoArabb children killed in the attacks on Israel, this shows a genuine concern for his people not shown by Bin Laden and Zarqawi, who blow up their own people willy-nilly all over Iraq for no good reason. He inserts his message into the apology, but in a sane and rational tone.

"To the family that was hit in Nazareth -- on my behalf and my brothers', I apologize to this family. Some events like that happen. At any event, those who were killed in Nazareth, we consider them martyrs for Palestine and martyrs for the nation. I pay my condolences to them."

Now, he was later asked about Israel's capabilities and effectiveness. Now what have we heard from other terrorists? We've heard stuff that basically amounts to a belief that technology and numerical advantage doesn't matter, as if Allah were personally going to come down and start suplexing jets out of the air. Not Nasrallah, he comes off as sane and with a good grasp of reality.
According to CNN, Nasrallah called the Israeli airforce "the most powerful air force in the Middle East and one of the most powerful in the world, and they own the skies."
The CNN article further said Nasrallah said it was "logical" that Lebanon has incurred more casualties than Israel because Israel has better military technology and, unlike Lebanon, its civilians have bomb shelters.
What's worse, Nasrallah says what many were already thinking, showing he has a solid grasp on the word on the street, both in the Middle East and in New York.
Again, from the CNN article:

"Israel's response to Hezbollah rocket attacks has been excessive because its goal is not to free the soldiers but "to eradicate Hezbollah and every other resistance in Lebanon," he added.
Israel, he said, would have found a pretext to launch the current offensive even if the soldiers had not been kidnapped."

Apparently, Israel is aware of it's own political vulnerability in this, as they have trotted out Benjamin Netanyahu to be a mouthpiece on many occasions, obviously acknowledging Olmert's lack of political skill and his inability to appear as an honestly peace-loving statesman (something our own president has a problem with). However, it's been too little.
Unless Israel gets inventive and smart, they are going to lose this fight, lose some traction on the world stage, and actually decrease their security instead of increasing it.
Honestly, they need to kill Nasrallah. Perhaps moreso than we need to kill bin Laden. He's smart. Damn smart, and he's politically savvy as well (something bin Laden is not). Obviously he has the resources to have struck at Israel in some way more dramatic, but instead he poked the beehive with a stick, and then pointed out to the world how vicious the swarm was. Israel has my sympathy in dealing with this guy. I'm really glad al Queda isn't as smart. Hezbollah is making them look like rank amateurs..Unfortunatelyy, they are doing the same to Israel.

The revolution will be..umm...podcast?

2006-07-13T08:12:00.000-04:00

You know, I've never been one to hop on to the cultural-phenom-of-the-moment bandwagon. Back in school I never cared what shoes were really in, never wanted to buy the latest cool jacket (esp since in Detroit that was determined by which one would get you mugged the fastest) or automatically listened to the current lead music artist (my friends have suffered through my Bjork fixation for years). Even today, I couldn't tell you who won the last American Idol, I don't own an Ipod, and I've never watched an episode of Lost. But, yesterday, I did finally cave in to societal pressure and join.....Myspace.com.
Immediately I found a couple friends I haven't spoken to in ages, found out lots of new hometown news (including that my first nutball wife has been popping out rugrats like a pez dispenser...HA!!!) and then I took it further. I found out how to drop HTML code into my page, found one of my favorite underground music artists (Chiasm, AKA Emileigh Rahn, who I hung out with a few times at a Detroit club called Ascension U.K.) and put her favorite song to cue up when you go to my myspace page.
In minutes I was on the phone with an old friend who had gone to Iraq, found out another friend now owns the comic book store he used to hang out in and realized how many people I've been out of contact with for so long.....Maybe there's something to this Myspace thing afterall.
I'll give it a spin for a while, kick the tires, etc. but already I noticed something amusing. While looking for names of people I used to know, I noted that there were a lot of 99 year olds signed up. Turns out it's just kids who are underage who want to bypass myspace's protective measures for minors. I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be that hard for myspace people to look at the age and then the pic of some teenybopper and figure that out, so I guess their interest in actually cleaning up their bad rep is fairly superficial.

So, anyway, check out the page at http://www.myspace.com\iljackson

If I never see the inside of a hospital again...

2006-07-10T20:52:00.000-04:00

I know a lot of you wonder why I haven't been posting lately in the boards I usually frequent. Well, since 4th of July, Rae has been very ill. In fact, she was hospitalized over the weekend.
Doctors at first thought it was a viral infection, but whatever they did it just got worse. It was not until Sunday that doctors determined that there was no infection, in fact she was having an allergic reaction to an antibiotic she had been given the week before for an ingrown toenail. Of course, while they were thinking it was viral, she was steady continuing to take the antibiotics, making the reaction worse and worse. Finally, on our second trip to the emergency room on saturday morning, after the entire upper half of her body turned red and she had a temperature of 103, they decided to keep her there for the weekend.
She's on the mend now, really weak, and I'm taking care of her best I can.
One of the funny things is that rae is a very dainty eater usually. How dainty? When she orders from McDonalds, she orders 4 mcnuggets, a small fries and three chocolate chip cookies. She usually cannot finish the nuggets.
Now, because they put her on steroids to fight the allergic reaction, she has this (for her)raging appetite. But, importantly, she's on the mend, feeling much better. Once she's back to 100% I'll probably be writing more again.

Living between moments

2006-07-05T16:03:00.000-04:00

Recently, it has felt like I am living between moments, between ticks of the clock. By that, I mean I feel as though I'm living between turning points in my life. On the one hand is my departure from journalism, the separation from my last wife (and pending divorce). On the other hand....I'm not sure. Writing is my calling, and I think I'm on the cusp of a big achievement in my life, but I don't want to jinx it, so I'll let you know when I have more news on that (should be later this week). In addition, a publisher is looking at my novel. No clue what my chances are there.
Right now I am floating...between moments.
My adult life has been broken down, career-wise, into a series of checkpoints. First, I just wanted to be a journalist, writing for a paper, any paper and getting a byline. I got that as soon as I got out of high school, beating out mopst reporters I know by four years or so. Next was getting a front page story. Got that, unfortunately, with a drive-by shooting that took the life of an eleven year old boy. Interestingly enough, this turned into something else odd. I got contacted soon afterward by a famous Detroit Deejay, the Electrifying Mojo, who says he was inspired by the incident, my article, and a dream, to do a book of poetry called "The Mental Machine." So my first frontpage story ended up in the first pages of this book, somewhat immortalized. Something about that incident charged me...there was no stopping me. Years later and thousands of stories later I landed in D.C. achieving the major goal of becoming a capitol hill reporter, chatting it up with senators and the like. After three years of that, however, I got both disillusioned and...well, bored. My next goal was nearly forgotten. That of writing a book. I left the biz, took a year off to both write a book and do some freelance writing.
Books written and I'm trying to find a publisher. I'm also trying to get into the role-playing game industry. I'm set on achieving one of these goals...and soon, I hope, so I can get out of this achievement limbo.

Being American means...

2006-06-28T20:46:00.000-04:00

A few things that represent what being American means to me, and hopefully, to most real Americans.

Being American means you'd choose freedom over safety when it's actually an issue.

Being an American means you never start a fight, but always finish one.

Being American means that even if you are a Christian, you understand that "[T]he government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion;" -- United States Treaty (1796-1797)

Being American means that you love and respect the U.S. flag, and not the flag of enemies who tried to destroy us, which includes both the Nazi flag and the Confederate Flag.

Being American means that when others raise these flags, or burn ours, you remember that, as an American, their freedom to do so comes first.

Being American means that you believe that all men are created equal, meaning that just as you have the right to marry who you want, think how you want, live where you want, you'll defend that right for others, even when it goes against your own personal beliefs, you defend the right for others to make that choice for themselves, just like you can.

Being American means that you are personally offended by those who claim we should not criticize the President, or, in the words of President Theodore Roosevelt, “To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public.”

Being American means that you are automatically suspicious and critical of any thing that impinges on your freedom and privacy in the name of defense against a foreign enemy...or, in the words of James Madison, "The means of defense against foreign danger historically have become the instruments of tyranny at home."

Being American means an automatic distrust of anyone in power, Democrat or Republican or independent, and understand that those in power are to always be watched.

Being American means your hackles raise when anyone in power says "just trust me."

Being American means loving BOTH a free economy AND a beautiful, healthy land, and knowing there can be a balance.

Being an American means expecting everyone, yourself included, to be responsible for their actions, but willing to help your fellow man when he is truly down.

People's Comments

2006-06-22T07:01:00.000-04:00

Wow, just learned people were unable to comment to the blog. Here I thought nobody was reading! I think I've fixed it. Someone try to comment for me? Thanks.

My new toy

2006-06-17T10:58:00.000-04:00

Just got a brand new laptop that I'm having a lot of fun with. It's my first laptop, as usually I like to build my own PC. It's a gateway, also a first for me. AMD athalon 64 4000+ processor, with a gig of ram, a dedicated ATI radeon mobility x600 video card with 256 meg of ram (half that is dedicated ram). I've run Sims 2 and Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion on it with no problems at all so far. It's also got a 100 gig harddrive and a DVD rewritable drive, making it better than my desktop!

My place is hooked up for wireless so now I can go all over the house. It'll help, as we had the TV and computers in separate rooms, and it will be nice to be able to post on the boards and play Oblivion and whatnot while snuggled up next to rae watching the Colbert Report.

I'm going to get a new mouse today, though. I can handle the touch pad for basic stuff, but it just doesn't work for gaming.

I also need to know how to secure my wifi so people aren't hoboing off me, as well as how to network with my computer. I'd rather do it (and understand it) myself, as opposed to having Besy Buy's Geeksquad do it for like $50. So if anyone out there has done this before, let me know.

Opposition to Gay Marriage is anti-Jesus, and probably means you're gay

2006-06-06T20:55:00.000-04:00

(obviously the headline should be considered tongue-in-cheek)
One nagging question that's been bouncing around in my brain for the past several years is what version of the bible that far right religious extremists and so-called evangelicals are reading from?

Was there a new abridged version released in recent years that had some really radical changes in it? I sometimes believe that must be the case, when I hear the thinly-veiled hate-filled rhetoric spewing out of the mouths of so called Holy Men in this country.

I'm referring to a lot of stuff in general, but specifically the anti-human rights faction focused on keeping homosexuals as second-class citizens. I'm going to address some points on a pretty basic, factual level...and I'm going to do it from the standpoint of a Christian....one who still believes that Christ is part of Christianity.

First, let's break down the quaking sand dunes holding up this house of cards the religious right calls an argument. It breaks down into several major points.
1. Gay marriage goes against Christianity.
2. Gay marriage will destroy the sanctity of marriage.
3. Gay marriage destroys morality.

The first one is probably the most dodgy. It only really holds up if there's some attempt at consistency with other Old Testament laws, and if you just really don't care what Jesus actually had to say about sin, vice, and the whole point of his presence on earth. My biggest fear is that people will look at these nut jobs and think they are actually representing Christianity. I don't believe that any more than Osama bin Laden represents Islam.
Passages against homosexuality are in the Levitical laws (which were not even written for the common man, but for a special order of priests) in the old testament. They are pretty straightforward. However, they also equate homosexuality with other sins of the time, such as eating shellfish, and wearing two different textiles at the same time. No, I'm not making that up. According to the Bible, homosexuality is as bad as wearing cotton and silk at the same time. But then, the same section of the good book indicates you should stone a priest's daughter to death for having sex on her period.
Now, I'll buy following levitical law for going against homosexuality just as soon as I see Christian Religious Right groups push for a Constitutional Amendment banning Red Lobster and polyester blends. Remember, the bible doesn't indicate it's worse than any other. In fact, according to the bible, the worst thing sexually you can do is jerk off. You sin "less" if you buy a prostitute.
Now, of course, if you ever cracked open the Bible to do more than look at the pretty pictures, you know that levitical and other old testament laws are moot to Christians anyway. Not only did Jesus say that all the old rules were out and "do onto others" was in, but he specifically spoke out against those who would call themselves "righteous" and attack the sinners. Before going to dine in a place filled with sinners, Jesus was chastised by the disciples, saying that being seen with the sinners would ruin his reputation. Jesus replied that prostitutes, moneylenders, pimps, cutpurses, and a whole host of unsavory individuals had more of a place in his father's kingdom than any man who believed himself so righteous that he cast judgment on others. And, of course, there's the "cast the first stone" speech.
I mean really, did any of these guys go to Sunday school?

Second argument: That gay marriage will destroy the sanctity of marriage.
What? Huh? Can someone explain this to me in a way that does NOT make my head explode? First, how is what two other people are doing in their own home, going to ruin your marriage? Your vows are between you, your spouse and God. If two guys down the street, next door, or in the next penthouse, getting married disrupts that, then I have news for you: You had problems already. There should be no way the fact that two people get married should have any impact on your personal marriage. And lets' face it. The so-called sanctity of marriage has taken more of a beating from other venues...and evangelicals haven't made a peep about them. Where were they when Britney Spears got married and anulled in less than 24 hours? Where were they when Fox aired "Who Wants to Marry a Midget"?

Third, the argumeht that gay marriage will lead to rampant immoralism. Okay, so, let me follow the logic trail on this one: Putting provisions in place for a sexually active group of people which would allow them to enter into legally binding committed relationships is going to.....decrease moral behavior? How does that work? One of the things the gay community has been criticized for is allegedly being too promiscuous. Now, if you are or were married, did you fool around and engage in generally risky behavior (if at all) more BEFORE you were married...or AFTER? If you answer AFTER, you have issues that have nothing to do with gays or straights. In addition, they argue that allowing gays to marry will lead to polygamy (which I personally have no problem with between consenting adults) and people marrying their pets. Whoa....how did we get from two consenting adults entering into a willing, contractual relationship that allows them to share property rights, tax benefits and health care, to some guy marrying his yorkshire terrier? Somebody draw that map for me.

Now, be warned, the next bit is going to tick you off severely if you disagree with me.
One of the cruxes of the arguments against homosexuality is that it must be voluntary. That it is a choice.
Bullpucky. Nobody chooses to go through that. Science repeatedly keeps finding that EVERY indication is that nature has more of an influence than nurture. But let's not even deal with that. Think of the psychological logic behind saying that every man or woman has a choice of being gay or straight.
Here's a factually, logically, unavoidable conclusion. Anyone who espouses the belief that being gay is a choice, must believe that they themselves have homosexual tendencies. You can't escape it.
if you believe that being sexually aroused by someone of the same sex is a choice, it is INESCAPABLE that you believe that you have made this "choice" yourself.
That means that you, personally, believe that you could, if you choose, enter into a homosexual relationship with someone whenever you decided to.
Unavoidable logic. If you believe sexual orientation is a choice, then you believe you yourself chose one path or the other, meaning that the OTHER path, that of being gay, was a viable, considerable option to you.
You cannot believe being gay is a choice unless you yourself "CHOSE" (meaning it was a viable option for you) to be straight.
I don't know about most other guys, but I know that, simply put, biologically I could not function with another man. I never chose to be straight. I get stimulated by women, I don't get stimulated by guys. No choosing there. Mr. Happy just won't rise up for the occasion.
If you believe that being gay is a choice, then your Mr. Happy obviously has risen at some point for a man (or whatever the same anology would be for a woman). Can't dodge it, can't avoid it, can't work or logic your way around it.
If it's not a choice, then it's a biological condition that you are born with, like race or gender, which means it should enjoy the same protections, which places it squarely in the way of Loving v. Virginia, the Supreme Court decision that shot down laws prohibiting interracial marriage.
If you do not believe that, then you probably believe homosexuality is a choice, which means that you, yourself, are a bit gay.

Ever have periods of pulling back?

2006-05-30T19:53:00.000-04:00

I think I'm going through one of my periods of sort of pulling back. I go through modes over time: At one point I'm gregarious and outgoing, and a few months later I'll be sort of a recluse. I'm not sure if it has anything to do with the seasons or what, but I get grumpy and then reclusive, and don't communicate much outside of a very small circle. I'm not sure why I do it, but I do. I've got friends who I might not talk with for months at a time. It's not that I'm upset with them or anything, but at that point I'm probably not communicating much with anyone. Rae, my slave, being the exception of course. Even she probably notices that my temperment changes for a time before it shifts back. Although we've been together less than a year so I'm not sure if she's detected the pattern.
I do, however, tend to get a lot done during these periods. The writing of my book was one such time in my life. I virtually never left the house for five months and my only contacts with the world were my soon-to-be ex wife and a group of Goreans I'd chat with online.

I doubt rae or my neighbor and good friend Vox will actually let me pull back too far however. They have ways of bringing me to the surface. In fact, it was Vox doing just that which connected me with rae last summer.

So if I'm hard to find for a while, my regrets, it's just one of those things I go through.

New addictions

2006-05-22T07:43:00.000-04:00

One of the things I love about Rae is that she's about as big a geek as I am. However, she sometimes tries not to admit it. What's more, I'm making her worse. In the last two months she's ran through almost all of R.A. Salvatore's Drizzt Do'Urdan books. She's also read his entire Clerical Quintet series. On top of that, she games in my hero's game and when she moved in she took up whole shelves of my bookcase with her massive Dragonlance novel collection and Mercedes Lackey and Robert Jordan books.
Now, she's gotten me addicted to a new computer RPG. Her revenge for me getting her into gaming I guess.
For years I've owned Elder Scrolls of Morrowind III, but only would dabble in it here and there, never getting much done and eventually putting it down to play something else.
She used to own it on XBox and used to always lament her long, lost powerful Morrowind character. For the longest time she resisted playing it on the computer because she prefers a controller to keyboard and mouse. However, a week or so ago she started playing on the computer.
THen I started watching.
Then I made a character, after seeing how she played.
Now we're both hooked.
Only problem is that there's one computer in the house and two Morrowind fiends.
On top of that I like to play City of Heroes/Villians as well.
So, do we plan to shake our addictions? Hellz no! I'm saving up to get a new laptop in a few weeks.
I'm looking at one that has an AMD processor that's 3.4 gig equivalent, 1 gig ram, 100 gig harddrive and a ATI Radeon 200m 128meg dedicated video card. It's also got a 17 inch screen.
Since my best friend Hari hooked up my house for wireless when he visited in January (earning him an indefatigueable wealth of cool points) I'll be able to not only carry it around the house, but also my next door neighbor and good friend Vox will be able to tap into my wireless, giving the three computers the ability to have some good LAN gaming fun.
Which means my addiction will probably get worse, but it also means that I'll be able to sit upstairs with Rae when she's watching her evening dose of Daily Show and Colbert Report. Usually I'm downstairs on the computer and we'd both prefer being up there together during our downtime.

In related news, she and I are planning to redecorate the apartment. Our apartment is huge, about 2,000 square feet. but we don't use 3/4 of the upstairs because it's one HUGE room (with half the ceiling slanted down at 45 degrees) but there's only one electrical outlet. Fortunately her dad is a pretty handy guy and has said he'll install one or two more lines up there for us. We plan on turning it into a living room, which we really don't have. Right now we have a big bedroom, the backroom, which is our computer room/library/home office and upstairs there's a smaller room we use as a TV room. Problem is that it isn't very conducive to company. Not that she and I have much company, we're pretty private people (for reasons many of you well know). But it would be nice if we had somewhere for friends to sit when they stop by.

The Male Hero Factor

2006-05-14T19:48:00.000-04:00

I had an interesting week. I had to bail a friend out of jail. I won't go into the details, but it was over a woman.
The problem is that it was a woman we all, him included, knew was nuts. Real crazy.
I've had my dance with crazy with my first wife. Learned a painful lesson too.
We, as men, have to find a control point for our hero factor. A lot of men, good men, think that they can "save" a girl with issues. Quite often we cannot, and end up just getting ourselves into trouble and heartache. But there has to be a point where you realize that it just ain't worth it. It's very hard to change someone, and it's often disappointing, frustrating, and if you are successful (which is rare) then you and that person may no longer be a match.
We are still trying to rescue the maiden from the dragon's lair. That's honorable. But there are very few dragons left to slay in the world. To fill the void, we aim our swords of valor at mental and psychological demons threatening to devour some innocent maiden. However, unless you have a psychology degree, you aren't armed right. All the good intention and determination in the world won't be armor enough against the fiery breath of a good ole fashioned character flaw. Eventually, you will get burned.
Here is what I suggest. If you find a nice girl who has some issues, and you want to be in a relationship with her and help her, you should do one, critical mental exercise.
Look at that girl as she is today, right at the moment where you're sure you know everything wrong with her. Then ask yourself this question: "If this girl never changes, if she never improves one iota, if these flaws are still here 20 years from now, can I accept her the way she is and be happy with her?" If the answer is an honest yes, then go ahead, knowing that come good or bad you care for her for who she is, not who you think she can be.
Fortunately, in this case, my friend was wise enough to put a wall up between himself and this girl, never allowing a physical relationship to really form and take root. He got that knowledge from a previous, painful relationship. It didn't keep him from a night in "stony lonesome" but it did keep him from a broken heart.

Palladium Open House and Going home

2006-05-10T19:24:00.000-04:00

I got back late monday from a trip to Michigan to an Open House thrown by Palladium Books, an role-playing game company that I'm a fan of.
It also happens to be just outside of my home town of Detroit, which I have not visited in a year.
All in all it was one of the most relaxing times I've had in about a year, maybe more.
Rae and I drove across country on a trip that took over 8 hours. We could have flown, but I had this huge sword and print from Lord of the Rings that I wanted to give my mother. The sword was a huge two-handed replica of the swords used by the Nazgul, and the print was Eowyn vs the Witch King, my mother's favorite part of the Lord of the Rings novels.
Also, I knew rae and I would buy plenty of swag at the Open House.
We got there late Thursday night, checked in and collapsed.
Friday was spent with my family, mainly my mother and grandmother. We went down to the Motor City Casino and came out in the black. Then I went to see both my grandfathers.
My grandfather on my father's side, I learned, had developed Parkinson's disease and was in physical rehabilitation. He is 84. I promised that I would come back on Sunday night and see him along with my cousins.
Then we went to the VIP night at the open house and I got to meet the creator of Palladium Books, Kevin Siembieda. I really would like to work for this guy, and this company, so I brought a bunch of book ideas and potential projects. He seemed genuinely interested in the projects and I'll be pushing that as far as I can take it.
We did some shopping that night, expecting that if we waited until Saturday all the best stuff would be gone.
I'm not going to get into details about what we got, but let's just say I indulged myself on some reliving some old childhood memories.
I also got to meet a lot of people whom I have only talked to online before that night, which was a lot of fun. It's funny what kinds of mental images you develop for people and how jarring it is when they don't fit them. I'm not even sure where we get the information to build the images for people that we have in our minds. It is a phenonemon that is solely, I think, the creation of the internet: Building a mental image of someone that you interact with regularly, without ever seeing an actual picture of them, or perhaps a still photo or two.

On saturday it was a lot more smoozing, shopping and just hanging out with cool people. Don't know how to describe it really beyond that. On the boards where this is best known the details are already covered in depth.

I guess what was pivotal for me was SUnday night, when I actually got to see my grandfather, which I guess is what this post is really about.
He looked terrible. he could hardly speak and I'm not really sure whether he recognized me or not. He was bone-thin, and incoherent, trembling under the effects of Parkinson's disease.
I don't think I was mentally ready for it. I didn't expect it. It shook me up for the rest of the evening, even though I think I covered it fairly well.
This was a very strong man in my youth. Although he always seemed to be old in my youthful eyes, it never struck me that he could get any older, and so frail.
They say he can recover quite a bit with therapy and good care, but it is so hard to envision after seeing him like that.

You know what's strange? I've been going through this...well, fear....of death over the last few months. I think it's because I've come to realize my mortality in a very real way. The thing is, that visit to my grandfather impacted that, but I'm not quite sure how yet. One part of me would rather pass on than live incapacitated. Another part of me, the dominant part of my psyche I think, would cling to whatever faint spark of life that I had for as long as possible. He is supposed to come home today, and that's good. Recover or not, I'd rather have him there at home surrounded by family than in that rehabilitation center.

Sorry if I'm not as clear as I usually am, I'm still sorting out my feelings on this one.

Immigration rant

2006-05-01T09:26:00.000-04:00

Today, across the nation, illegal immigrants and many in the latino community have decided to stay away from work and not spend their money in an effort to push the country toward an immigration reform package that would offer amnesty to illegal immigrants.
I have quite a few problems with this. But first let me make it clear it has nothing to do with ethnicity. It has everything to do with the law, security and common sense.
First, let's delve into the fact that organizers of this boycott are screaming for justice. Justice? For illegal immigrants? Excuse me if I'm wrong, but isn't that specifically asking for us to jail, fine and deport them? That is the law. Thus, that would be justice.They knew what they were doing was illegal, didn't they? Yet, that doesn't seem to be what the organizers are asking for. They are asking for amnesty and for people to be rewarded for illegal activities. That's the opposite of justice, isn't it? That's injustice.
Now, why do I call it injustice? Well, what about everyone who comes over legally? What about all the people who fight their way through the red tape and bureacracy and EARN citizenship in this country? Wouldn't offering amnesty to illegal immigrants be pretty much like pissing in the coffee? We don't, usually, reward people for breaking the law (unless we make them president first). I honestly don't think we should start.
Some would say illegal immigrants earned citizenship through their hard work and that they've been an asset to the country. I don't follow this logic at all. All you earn when you work is your paycheck. They've been able to access our healthcare and general freedoms, as well as our security, stable economy, high standard of living, and public amenities. On top of that, they've driven wages down for honest workers, and been of assistance in helping weaken labor unions, allowing employers a little more latitude in bending us over and shoving it in. Hey, don't do me any more favors, okay?
So the cost of grapes are 50 cent cheaper per pound. Well, considering the strain on public education, healthcare, housing, police and utilities, I think we come up fairly even. In fact, maybe less than even on behalf of honest, legal americans.
Not only that, but don't believe for an instant all illegal immigrants work on a farm for crap wages. I've known illegals who were plumbers, drywallers, construction workers and other good-paying blue-collar professions. Those jobs could have, and should have, gone to legal citizens.
Personally, I think we are jumping the gun on this. Staunch the tide over the border first, then deal with those who are here. The first thing you should do when you find yourself in a hole is stop digging. When did this tidbit of logic get discarded?
And if they truly want things fair, then why do the same organizers protest securing the border.
I'm all for a big, electrified fence, national guard units with permission to open fire, and helicopters with infrared. And I sure as hell don't support watering holes strategically placed on this side of the border so criminals don't get dehydrated while invading our country. That's one of the most assinine things I've ever heard.
People cry and say that what I suggest would get a lot of people hurt. Well, you know what? Here's my advice: IF YOU DON'T BREAK THE LAW IT'S NOT A PROBLEM.
Why, could someone tell me, is this concept so hard for about half this country to grasp?
We are not entitled to be kind, nice, or hospitable to you when you are trying to break our laws. We're certainly not entitled to assist you or make it easier by inaction.
Once we get the border secured, we start deporting....I'm talking stuffing C-130s full of people and dropping them back where they came from. People say it's impracticle to deport 12 million people. Okay, I can dig that. But we could make a reasonable dent. Hey, we accomplished the Berlin air drop for heaven's sake. I think we can handle this. But, I accept that we won't deport all of them, so another solution has to present itself. Amnesty isn't it.
Finally, let's talk about the whole act of illegally crossing the border and why it sticks in my craw.
First, it's our first contact with you as a future citizen and your first action is to break the law, knowingly. Not starting off on the right foot, are we?
Second, I really doubt an illegal immigrant, in general, is going to be an asset to our country. You've already shown yourself to be a quitter. If you are that much of a benefit to us, why didn't you stay and fix your own country? If things go bad here are you going to drop everything and head to Canada next? Gee, I hope there's no worldwide decline of civilization or half of Mexico would be living in the North Pole by the time it was done!
You want to show us some moxy? Stick with your country and fix the problems at home. Then you won't need to risk crossing the desert, getting shot, dying of dehydration, only to end up busting your hump for $3 an hour and getting pesticide poisoning.
You think you have it bad? I'm black. We got beat on, discriminated against, couldn't vote, and occasionally hung from a tree or set on fire. We stuck with it here. It's still not perfect, but there's been no mass exodus to Ontario yet.
We changed the system through both legal wrangling and a bit of civil disobedience. And while economically Mexico is bad, it's sure as hell not "let's go lynch us a n____!" bad. So illegal immigrants really have no excuse. There are plenty of people staying in Mexico who are busting their butts to change things for the better. Hey, if you're a member of some persecuted group whose life or liberty is at risk, that's one thing. That's why we have the wet foot/dry foot rule with Cubans. But in 99% of the cases of illegal immigrants, that isn't the issue. They just want a better life.
They look over the fence and see the grass is much greener over here. You know why it's greener? Because we took the time and effort to water the lawn.

Read This and Help!

2006-04-20T00:44:00.000-04:00

Please Help Save Palladium from Going Under

Order Here!

An open letter from Kevin Siembieda, President & Owner.

A Crisis of Treachery

At a time when Palladium Books’ future has never looked more promising, we have been dealt a crippling blow.

For legal reasons, I cannot go into details about exactly what happened. Suffice it to say that betrayal of trust, theft, and embezzlement has inflicted what we estimate to be $850,000 to 1.3 million dollars in damages to Palladium.

It is a blow from which Palladium cannot recover. At least, not without YOUR help.

Out of options . . .

I have borrowed tens of thousands in loans and sunk every dime I’ve had into Palladium Books. I’m selling everything I own to keep Palladium going. That’s the real reason I’m selling my 25 year old toy collection, art and other items at the Palladium Open House.

But it’s not enough.

For the last year I had kept Palladium going with the hope that something would break in our favor. After all, we had all kinds of exciting things going on behind the scenes, and the huge loss seemed, for a while, like something we could overcome. Then a string of misfortune.

A series of unfortunate events

- The truly wonderful Rifts® videogame – Rifts® Promise of Power – was stillborn. The N-Gage platform never took off in North America. That meant the N-Gage and Rifts® Promise of Power would NOT be available on the mass market in the USA and Canada. Finding it anywhere in North America required an act of God.

- There would be no Nokia royalty-based revenue stream.

- Nor would there be a Nokia videogame sequel and the money that might come from it.

Note: Nokia treated me nothing short of GREAT. They lost truckloads of money on this venture. We’re both the victims of marketing fallout. Please don’t blame these wonderful people for Palladium’s woes – circumstance just didn’t make them part of our solution.

- Minimal gains into the book trade (Barnes & Noble, Borders, Hastings, etc.). PSI’s (Publisher Services Inc.) efforts to get Palladium RPG products into the book trade have been slow to say the least. Although we are confident PSI will be a good partner and get us into many national bookstore chains, it is taking much longer than anticipated.

- The Rifts movie? Stalled. Until Jerry Bruckheimer has a script he loves, the movie can’t get the green light. That makes perfect sense, but it doesn’t help Palladium’s bottom line right now.

- There were discussions with a company interested in doing a Rifts® MMOG but it didn’t pan out.

- Other potential deals have moved forward at a snail’s pace or have fallen to the wayside.

- Going public with this appeal may very well cost us getting the Robotech® license renewal.

- It doesn’t help that the role-playing game industry is in a slump and going through a transitional phase.

- Palladium has a team of amazing writers and artists brimming with ideas and enthusiasm. We have dozens and dozens of ideas and opportunities that will knock your socks off, but not the money to implement them.

- Palladium’s writers and artists have been troopers, waiting months to get paid, but their generosity is not enough.

- Treachery and skullduggery from within threatens to put us out of business.

Please help save Palladium Books®

I struggled and struggled with whether or not I should turn to YOU for help. Palladium and I have always had a close relationship with our fan base. Everything we do, we do with you in mind. We buck the trends, keep prices low, produce The Rifter®, and try to bring happiness with our annual X-Mas Grab Bag offer. We love gaming and gamers.

The irony is, we should be doing fine except for the treachery that has crippled us.

It was actually trusted fan-friends and freelancers who gave me the idea to turn to you, the people who are most important to our survival on so many levels.

Time and time again, each person I spoke to would be stunned by the news that Palladium was facing the possibility of closing its doors soon.

Time and time again, the person would say something heartfelt like, “I can’t believe it. I can’t imagine a world without Palladium in it. Kevin, if I had the money I’d give it to you in a heartbeat.”

I heard this so many times, almost word for word, that it gave me an idea. What if I went public and told all our fans about our trouble? Would they help?

It seemed like a viable solution, but was it right to ask our fans for . . . a helping hand?

My friend, Teresa Mead, helped me decide that this was the best solution when she said to me, “Kevin, I know your fans, and I think they’d be angry if you didn’t turn to them. They care about Palladium. If they find out they had a chance to save it, but Palladium’s gone because you didn’t ask them, it will make them furious. They’ll feel cheated and betrayed.”

I thought about that a lot, and I think she’s right. So here’s goes.

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How you can help

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Purchase the limited edition print “A Megaverse® United”

- I, Kevin Siembieda, will draw a special, pencil drawing with key characters from our entire game line to be made into a simple, black and white, toned piece of artwork, 11 x 14 inches, printed on a good quality paper.

- Each print will be hand signed by me. I’ll indicate which number that print is (i.e. #1, 2, 100, 1000, 2010, etc.). I don’t know how many there will be in the end; I pray for thousands!

- EVERYONE who purchases the print will see their names appear in the back pages of a major book listed as “Heroes of the Megaverse®!”

- The print will sell for $50.00 plus shipping and materials (envelope, protective cardboard, etc.), probably about $2.00-$5.00 by regular first class mail.

- We need those sales NOW!!! If 4,000 or 5,000 people all order that darn print within a month or two, it should give us the money we need to get back on our feet! Without a shot in the arm of some big cash, and fast, I fear Palladium is gone. That kind of jump start should carry us through the year and should enable us to do the other things we need to do to keep the company going for years to come!

YOU can make a real difference

This is one of those rare moments in life when YOU, as an individual, can make a real difference. You can be a real hero by purchasing one of those prints and encouraging every Palladium gamer you know to do the same. Spread the word online, at conventions, at game stores, everywhere. Encourage every Palladium fan who has ever enjoyed our games, purchased a Grab Bag, or visited us at a convention to run home and place an order.

I would never ask this great kindness of you if I didn’t think it would really work to save Palladium and keep us going for years.

This is easier than it may sound.

Four or five thousand may seem like a big number, but that’s not even close to the number of gamers who purchased the Rifts® Ultimate Edition within the first few weeks of its release!

Palladium has a mailing list of 14,000 fans who buy from us throughout the year.

We sold 2000+ Christmas Grab Bags last year alone.

We get 25,000-50,000 hits on the website every month, with some months exceeding 100,000!!!

Millions of gamers around the world have played our games over the years — Rifts®, Ninja Turtles®, Robotech®, Palladium Fantasy RPG®, Heroes Unlimited, Nightbane® and others. MILLIONS!

With YOUR help Palladium CAN survive, but we need a rapid infusion of cash. That means we need YOU to spread the word about Palladium’s situation and encourage others to buy a print too. And as soon as possible.

YOUR help is real

Any amount we can sell will make a difference. 2000 prints sold is a big help and “should” enable us to limp through the rest of the year working toward getting into the book trade and launching new products that can make a difference. 4000 prints sold “should” free us of the most crushing debt, and help get us standing on our feet. 5000 prints or more should help enable us to release a range of amazing role-playing games, sourcebooks and related products. With the cash we need, Palladium can do all of the following.

Release the stockpile of exciting new sourcebooks and products created by Palladium’s unbelievable crew of talented freelance writers and artists.

Palladium can release new RPGs and publish more products for ALL its game lines, hopefully boosting overall sales and making Palladium strong again.

Palladium can reprint key titles.

Palladium can expand vital advertising.

Palladium can keep doing the X-Mas Grab Bag that makes Christmas that much brighter for so many people.

With your help, a little luck and hard work, this will be the boost we need to keep Palladium going for years and years to come.

Without giving away too many secrets, we’ve been looking into a number of exciting licenses and new product areas you guys and gals have been asking for over the years, including novels, comic books and toys. Things that would already have been in production except for the crisis of treachery.

YOU will be a bigger, intrinsic part of the Palladium Megaverse than ever before. You’ll be true champions who did something noble, kind and significant.

YOU have my word that fans will always come first and I will repay you by keeping Palladium’s quality high, our prices reasonable, and giving back whenever I can.

What else can you do?

- Come to the Palladium Open House and celebrate the past, present and future, buy back-stock items, toys, art and rare collectibles.

- Keep supporting Palladium by purchasing our games at stores and online from Palladium Books.

- Spread the word about Palladium’s role-playing games to other gamers. The greatest sales tool there is, especially in this age of the internet, is “word of mouth.” Encourage others to play Palladium games, run games and demos at your favorite game store or local game convention.

- Take advantage of online offers and sales, like the 25th Anniversary items.

- Tell stores that you want our books and wish they’d carry them (but only if it’s true).

- Share your thoughts and ideas with us.

- Forgive me for having to bother you with our troubles. I hope this appeal doesn’t offend anybody. I’ve run out of options.

- Please do not try to assess blame or blast the person or persons who may be responsible. It can only lead to more trouble for Palladium. Besides, we need you to focus on the positive with us. Palladium CAN be saved with some help from its friends.

If Palladium Books should come to an end, I have no regrets. I’ll know I did everything possible to keep going and do right by everyone. I have nothing but wonderful memories I will cherish forever. Palladium Books has allowed me to touch the lives of millions of people, meet thousands of fans, and become friends with scores of wonderful people.

– Kevin Siembieda, Publisher – Spring 2006

Copyright 2006 Palladium Books Inc. All rights reserved.
This Press Release may be used and portions reprinted with Palladium's permission for the purpose of news and promotion. Rifts®, Megaverse® and Palladium Books® are registered trademarks of Palladium Books Inc. and Kevin Siembieda. Heroes Unlimited, Powers Unlimited, Beyond the Supernatural, Tome Grotesque, Beyond Arcanum, Splicers, MercTown, Merc Ops, Dinosaur Swamp, Chaos Earth, NEMA and all other titles and names are trademarks of Palladium Books.

The Iran Crisis and the Korea Effect

2006-04-15T00:07:00.000-04:00

Sorry about the delay. I couldn't access my blog for a few days there. Some of you have read this as I posted it elsewhere today.

Anyone who thinks that the actions of Iran in its enrichment of uranium are random or uncalculated could use a good head soak.
Iran's defiance of the UN and the US, as well as Europe and Russia, are a clear and calculated stalling tactic meant to hold things off long enough to actually develop a nuclear bomb, with which it can hold the world politically hostage.
I'm not saying they even intend to actually USE a bomb, but they want the bomb because it comes with political currency.
Were you the leader of Iran, you'd do it as well.
Look at the examples we have to go by. In recent history, Pakistan, India and North Korea have all developed nuclear weapons despite clear restrictions against nuclear proliferation.
How many punative measures have been taken against them?
How many airstrikes on their arsenals?
How many sanctions?
Instead, Pakistan got to buddy up to the US, despite being a dictatorship that is at times oppressive and being the country most likely to be harboring (however unwillingly) the most wanted man on planet earth. India got a nice fat nuclear power deal. And North Korea refuses to deal unless somebody can put something nice and juicy in the hand it's got out.
The one country that demured and actually did NOT have them, got invaded.
So, from Tehran's perspective: Have nuclear weapons, get cool stuff for free. Don't have nuclear weapons, get the 3rd tear-assing across your territory in tanks, kicking the ever-lovin' snot out of you.

Hrmmm....decisions, decisions.......

Is it really that hard to see why Tehran has chosen the path it has chosen?
If you were them, would you do any different?
It's not that I trust them with a nuke...oh hells no. I don't trust ANY nation in the Middle East with nuclear weapons, and that goes for Israel too.
It must be the heat or something, but rationality and peace doesn't seem to enter into the local politics.

But you can't, from a tactical perspective, blame Tehran for wanting the bomb. Where's the penalty, historically, for having nuclear arms?
Name a country whose development of nuclear weaponry got them shafted by the international community....
.
.
.
I'll give you some time....
.
.
.
Yeah. Not a single one. The only country that HAD nuclear weapons and gave them up was South Africa. And it wasn't really threatened over it by the international community.

Now, look at how America handles its non-nuclear enemies...such as Afghanistan, home of the Taliban and Al Queda, and Iraq. Neither had nukes, both got invaded.

The irony is that all the country's trying to urge Iran away from nukes, the U.S., France, Russia, and China, all HAVE THEM.
Now, I want you to think about this. You're going to build a gun. In a neighborhood of about 100 folks, only 10 of the others have guns. One has just mugged two of your closest neighbors who didn't have guns. Now, the neighbors who have guns are telling you that you should not build one. That it would be bad for you to have one.

Isn't that like when you were a kid and your friend had an ice cream cone, and saw you staring, and said: "Oh! You don't want THIS ice cream! It's sooo yucky! *slurp, slurp* MMMmmmm, absolutely horrible! Hey! Don't even THINK about stopping that ice cream truck! *slurp*"

Iran knows the U.S. is spread thin and that the public has no will to go to war over this. We'll be very suspicious of any attempt to invade YET ANOTHER middle eastern country rumored to have, or be working on, WMDs. In the words of our own president, "Fool me once...shame on you...fool me twice....but fool me can't get fooled again!"

Who Iran should have to worry about is Israel, but Israel giving an islamic middle eastern country the smackdown right after a Hamas political victory in the occupied territories, and after the US and Europe have decided to try to starve Hamas out by cutting off aid until it complies is not like throwing a match into the powderkeg, but like lighting your head on fire and trying to use the powderkeg to douse it.

This is a lose/lose situation. Because Iran isn't the most stable and secure country. It's bad enough that Pakistan and North Korea have nukes. Those places aren't paragons of stability, and our good friend Pakistan has already shown itself to not quite having stellar security over its nuclear secrets.
But nothing short of an outright attack is going to stop them from building a nuke, I believe, and the consequences of that may be as bad as them being armed.
It is another example of the failed policies of this adminstration on the foreign front and how we'll be reaping the costs for a long time to come.
Had we focused on al queda until we caught bin Laden and used more sense when dealing with Iraq, we'd have been in a better position to, let's be honest, bully North Korea away from its nuclear program, which in turn would have set a different benchmark. Were our armies not tied up in Iraq, and if bin Laden were in chains or a shallow grave that marines were using as a latrine, where he should be, the threat of force would be more potent against North Korea.
The last thing China wants to see is the US heading into NK. They'd have put the REAL pressure necessary to force NK to back off. Then the record would be: unarmed country, not attacked. Armed country, scared off by world powers. And Tehran would have had an entirely different playbook.

My big goals

2006-04-09T07:44:00.000-04:00

Everyone has one or two big goals theyd like to achieve in life. Mine is to become a published novelist.
I can't remember when exactly I first wanted to be a novelist, but it's been a desire of mine for a very long time.
I had honestly hoped to achieve it by now. Not that I'm disappointed in my life, I've reached quite a few goals.
I wanted to fly, and I did that for a while, though I didn't get my license.
I wanted to become a reporter, and I did that for a very long time. I also wanted to work on Capitol Hill as a reporter, and I reached that goal. I did that for about three years and realized that there was only one thing left to do: write a book.
All I want is to see my name on the spine of a book, maybe on its own little display stand at the entrance to Barnes and Nobles. So much of my imagination has been sparked by authors such as Edgar Rice Burroughs, J.R.R. Tolkien, R.A. Salvatore, Ann McCaffrey, and Robert Heinlein. I'd like to be able to do that for some kid somewhere. Just take his mind out of his world and set it free.
I learned a lot from those authors growing up, particularly Burroughs and Tolkien.
Growing up during the "Crack 80s" in Detroit, it would have been easy to slip into some really bad stuff. But I was probably almost idealistic. I knew the world was bigger than that. Now, my family and church had a lot to do with that as well, but quite a bit of it was due to John Carter's repeated rescues of Dejah Thoris, and Sam and Frodo's braving the veil of Gorogoroth.
Being able to do the same for some young mind, I'd feel as though I did something with my time on this rock other than take up oxygen.
Although I admit that I'm already proud of my stint as a reporter, and that I've had an effect on things. Due to an interesting twist of circumstances I'm responsible for at least one paragraph of Congressional language.
Not too shabby, I'd say.
But I got a lot of life left in me. I want to do more. I want to be remembered, read, and discussed, long after I'm gone. I'd also like to do a screenplay or two in there, as well as a role-playing book. The latter I missed by a hair. But the opportunity on that one may rise again in a couple months.
I want immortality. Several hundred years from now I want a tri-vid Discovery Channel special about me and my works. Long after I'm gone to whatever awaits us on the "other side" I want to be remembered. I want someone who's not a direct descendent to do an essay on me. I want some kid in the inner city, wondering if there's more, to open my book and find the answer in those pages.

Bad eating habits

2006-04-03T19:35:00.000-04:00

Well, I'm at about the halfway point of Lent and I haven't had a single bite of red meat. I'm holding up pretty well, all things considered. I haven't flipped out and cut anybody's head off (for which rae is greatly appreciative). And I haven't snuck off to have a burger. However, I'm tired of friggin' chicken.
I don't want to dig on too much swine. That stuff'll kill ya. But still for Easter Sunday, forget the traditional meal I want a big ole del monaco steak grilled by my homeboy, Vox (a.k.a. the patron saint of grillin', but that's another story).
Somehow, through all this, I've managed to put on weight, which is freakin' me out.
My doc is checking to see if my thyroid's acting up, but she thinks its busy season at my job. See, whenever we stay late they give us dinner. However, their selection isn't exactly health conscious. There's a fried chicken night, a pizza night and a lasagna night, among others. You aren't thinking balanced meal, you just shovel that crap down and keep workin' (I can't partake of lasagna night because it has ground beef).
We have a free membership to Gold's Gym, but do you know how hard it is to get your butt to the gym for lunch when you're pulling OT every day?
Things should lighten up this week however, and I'll be able to hit the gym if I can motivate myself, and start eating home cooked meals that make some sense.
What I'd like to do, actually, is do my low carb diet again. Last time I did that I lost 40 lbs in about three months. Not Atkins, mind you, but I just cut out about 80% of the carbs I'd normally eat and upped the meat and green vegetables and ruffage. I also took vitamin supplements to keep things in balance.
But rae is Italian. She'd go into a coma without pasta. I casually mentioned it and you should have seen the look of utter terror on her face. I think she broke out into a cold sweat.
So, I'll do it the old fashioned way...hit the gym. It's just a matter of finding the motivation to sacrifice my lunch break for it (the gym is only a block away from my job). It's approaching summer and I'd like to get rid of the extra pounds.
Eventually, I'd like to settle down at about 170 lbs. That was the weight where I was in the best shape of my life. I was also doing an hour and a half of aikido every couple days at the time though, so that made a big difference. It's been about 10 years since then, but hey, shoot for the moon, right?

shot from the grassy knoll, with a rifle made using alien technology from Roswell, by a Jewish media elite gunman during 911....

2006-03-29T19:17:00.000-05:00

Ah conspiracy theories.....

We all have our pet ones. We all have ones we think are "obvious" and we all have ones we think are a stinking load.
I'm no different.
I believe that the US government is hiding knowledge of extraterrestrial visitation.
I believe there was more to the JFK murder than one lone gunman acting on his own.

I do NOT believe there was a faked moon landing.
I do NOT believe there was anything other than al queda behind 9/11
I do NOT believe in a time tunnel in Maine that can be used to create psychic creatures.
I do NOT believe Hitler's clone is living in Argentina.

Then there are the things I know.

I KNOW there is no media conspiracy aimed at deluding the public, keeping people stupid, hiding "the truth" from you, controlling what you watch or what morals you develop or who you vote for.
What I believe and don't believe are irrelevant. The only thing we can ever speak to is what we know.
The simple truth is that if there is a media conspiracy to control the world or even just to turn honest news into advertising pieces at the cost of journalistic integrity I'd know about it.
I've worked at multiple news outlets across the country. I've written well over 4,000-5,000 stories at the very minimum. I've been a reporter and editor, freelance, bi-weekly, weekly, daily and quarterly.
I've covered everything from personal injury accidents in St. Clair County, Michigan farmland to Senate hearings on the energy bill.
There is no "the media". Period.
There is no cabal of media megacorps trying to own everything that hits the airwaves or print. Period.
News outlets, be they television, newspaper or internet, are a decentralized, non-organized mess of individuals who all are doing their own thing.
There are a few large companies, but they still don't account for most media outlets.
What's more, even with the recent sale of Knight-Ridder, notice how they sold off all their main papers to individual companies? Kind of hard to do if there's a supersecret plan to rule all papers and news stations.
Tomorrow, you could start a news website, hire five guys, get together some contacts, some phones and the like and you could start a news site.
And yes, it could become very popular and compete with major outlets.
I know this because the reporter who trained me at The Detroit News, John Bebow, did so with Michigan Live.
No shadowy guys in suits showed up at his doorstep and told him to toe the line. He wasn't bought out by crazed zionists bent on world domination, and he isn't sitting behind his desk scheming on how to screw the reader to bring in more advertisers.
Now, a large number of papers pay John to have their papers presented on the web.
I've covered highly sensitive stories. I've even covered stories that directly negatively affected my own paper's advertisers. Not once, not one single time, even when I ran a highly negative story on Wal-Mart, which shoveled out insane advertising dollars to the paper I was working at, did I ever have a story edited.
Not one time was I ever called into an editor's office and told "look, you have to slant this story this way" or "hey, we're going to change this story so that it looks more like A, B, or C" in any way that could be perceived as intentional slanting.
Were they all avoiding me? Am I the luckiest reporter on planet earth?
Or could it be that people just don't know how to read the paper or watch the news? Or that people, whenever they hear news they don't like, tend to think it can't be true, therefore the teller must be lying.
Why do you think it is that we have had, for centuries, phrases warning us against taking things out on the bearer of bad (or unwanted) news?
It's because people would rather believe that the bearer is wrong instead of the news being true.
People cannot handle the truth when the truth conflicts with what they want to hear.
Also, people cannot accept that they themselves might be the one who actually is perceiving things incorrectly.
True story, during a survey of how to better report the news at one paper I worked at, we did a test. We took a group of people who were self-proclaimed to have "right-leaning" political views and gave them a story and told them to find how it was slanted to the left. They came up with a nice long list. We did the same with a group of people who had "left-leaning" views. They too came up with a long list.
Problem was the two groups were given the same story. When they were put together in a room and shown the other side's lists even they, after some resistance, started to laugh and admit they saw how they themselves had slanted things.
I myself repeated this experiment on a message board and got the same result.
People read the news and watch the news through glasses colored with the tint of their own perspective.
However, people don't want to hear that they do that. They cannot accept it.
Case in point, there are people reading this who have, through the majority of it, never considered that any of the statements hearin might actually be true, but instead are more concerned with a retort to the premise.
They cannot accept that they might be perceiving things differently, or have certain biases. It is far easier for their minds to accept that there's a multinational conspiracy that has stretched for hundreds of years through a decentralized, unconnected industry made up of hundreds of thousands of people from every walk of life which ranges from the local city paper alternative rag, to major newspapers to cable news channels, owned by over 1,000 different unnconnected ownerships whose goal is to sacrifice the truth for the sake of advertising dollars or their own personal agenda which just happened to be signed off on by every reporter, desk editor, managing editor, copy desk editor and publisher (all the people who have to sign off on your average news story), very rarely whom are the same people for every story in an industry that actually BANS advertisers or Opinion Page editors from interacting with reporters.
Except, of course, unless they know you personally....then "oh, well not YOU, you're different."
I used to hear that before...except that phrase usually followed a lament about "those black people".
It's just as silly applying it to people in the news industry.

Another week under the grindstone

2006-03-27T07:59:00.000-05:00

Another federal deadline is coming up on my job, which means this week will be like last week. I worked 6 days for a total of over 50 hours, and Rae worked even sunday morning.
I never was really good at working for others. Personally, I've always done my best when working for myself.
But the pay is good and the work itself isn't that difficult.
However, I do want to get back into freelancing and pimping my novel.
I'm also going to throw a bunch of ideas at Kevin Siembieda at the Palladium Books Open House.
I used to freelance for Cigar Magazine, but they haven't needed any freelancers for their last two issues as they were overstocked on stories. Also I think my contract with them was before they had a good idea of their costs and they were paying me more than they could really afford to.
Oh, well, I'll fire off an e-mail to my editor there and see what's going on.
I just really needed a break from journalism for a while. Washington, D.C. burned me out on it.
I'm glad I was there and got to be one of the few people who could say they were a capitol hill reporter. I got to do things like cover important senate hearings, meet people like Hillary Clinton, John McCain, Joseph Lieberman and others whose names are going to be in the history books. These guys wielded a lot of power, but they had to respect the power of the press as well, so they treated you more or less like equals. I got a kick out of the fact that the second or third time I talked with Hillary that she used my first name because she remembered it. I figure when the former first lady knows you by name you're doing alright for yourself.
But.....
Covering the government wears on you. It's just like the saying goes about watching how sausage is made. Once you've seen it, you really don't want to eat sausage again.
I think the thing that bothered me the most is how very little doing what was right seemed to actually affect how our country is run. Doing what's expedient, politically smart, and cost effective all override doing what's right on the Hill.
And the young guys who come in with idealistic thoughts and an actual goal to do the right thing quickly get beat down by the older senators and representatives.
It's a very depressing atmosphere once you get on the inside.
I like it out here better, even if that means a few dollars less and no longer being able to just walk into the U.S. Capitol Building after waving hello to security, passing by all the gawking tourists.
But, this journalism thing is in my blood and I can feel it seeping slowly to the surface from underneath. Eventually I'll have to do something about that...

Doctor's appointment

2006-03-23T13:52:00.000-05:00

I have a doctor's appointment in the morning. It's for a general check-up, mostly.
You know what I hate about doctor's appointments? I hate the fact that you MIGHT find out something is wrong with you. I realize, rationally, that it was probably there before the appointment, but if I don't know about it and it's not bothering me at the time I can't worry about it. I know that's nuts, the sooner you find out something the better, but I feel the same way about taking my car into the shop. I hate doing it because they just might find something actually wrong with it.
I guess that's better than the wheel coming off in the middle of traffic or having a stroke at work, but the trepidation is still there.
Also, I've never been one of those people who had a steady doctor for years on end. Mainly because I move around so much. Every two years or so I'm somewhere else it seems. I get wanderlust. That makes it hard to have a regular doctor. My grandfather used to be my doctor, but he retired long ago. I don't think I've ever trusted any doctor like I've trusted him, but then again he IS my grandfather, that's a hard one for the average doctor to top.
So we've crossed a couple weeks of no red meat now and I'm holding up pretty good. I actually tried boca burgers (veggie burger-type substance) and they weren't half bad, actually.
I'm sick of chicken though. Trying to find more fish, but don't want to eat any more pork than necessary.
Next few posts are likely to be short and sometimes scattered. I've worked 12 hour days all week, and I've worked saturdays as well.
When I get home I keep saying that I'm going to do this or that...but I end up sleeping instead. This will last til the end of tax season (April 15). After that things should get better.

The Hero's Journey (Gamer style)

2006-03-22T07:32:00.000-05:00

This is something I wrote some time back. It involves using Joseph Campbell's "Hero's Journey" model in creating a campaign. I know sseveral GMs read this site and thought you might enjoy it.

There is a specific model that can be used to make a riveting campaign outline. If you stick with it, maybe even play with it a little, you will go a long way toward creating a riveting campaign.
There is something called the "Hero's Journey" model, postulated by a man named Joseph Campbell. Every adventure you have ever seen that you likely considered to be good is based on this model that always resonates with the human spirit when done correctly.
This model was used in the creation of Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, The Matrix, La'Muerte de Artur (King Arthur's legend), the adventures of Hercules, Perseus, Drizz’t Do'Urdan, Siegfried and the ring of Nebulung, the Yamato Takeru legend, Dragonlance, Starship Troopers, etc. If any of the above caught your fancy, then you are already a fan of the Hero's Journey and know how well it can work when done right.
What most people don't realize is that it makes an excellent framework for a campaign in role-playing as well. Using this model in a campaign can be easy, fun and gives a real sense of adventure.
It is broken down into the following format

The Separation

The beginning of the story is focused on taking the hero(s) away from their normal world, usually through shock or trauma and setting them on the path of adventure. This has three key segments:

The Call: Something forces the heroes on the road toward adventure. It is traumatic and separates them from all they have known before and requires them to make a decision to face the unknown and perilous danger. In Star Wars, Luke gets the message from the Princess from R2. In Lord of the Rings, Frodo learns the truth of the ring. In Arthurian Legend, Arthur, a lowly squire pulls the sword from the stone and becomes King.
In a role-playing game this takes place usually in the first or second adventure or so. A great trial is hinted at and requires the heroes to do something about it and put themselves in danger. In a previous campaign I ran, it was the group finding 1/4 of the creation plans for the iron juggernauts, pulling them away from the relatively mundane duty of escorting Tolkeen refugees.

The Threshold: Something may hold the hero back, something he has to overcome and say "Okay, I am ready for this adventure, come what may." Often, this is internal and not an external force. In my campaign, the group had to make the determination that if they returned to their guard duty they would be walking into the hands of the enemy. Had they stayed ignorant of what they knew it would have meant nothing to them, but knowing what they had learned they had to choose a new path. In Star Wars, Luke's Uncle Owen is the barrier, who is removed by his death at the hands of the storm troopers. In Lord of the Rings, Frodo has to go against the naturally sedentary life of a Hobbit, and leave his home.

The Guardian/Mentor/Talisman: The Hero can't just wander out into the cold cruel world without an edge, oh no. He receives a guardian, a mentor or a talisman of power to aid him in his journey. In most cases the hero receives the mentor and the talisman. They never seem to be enough to actually solve the hero's big problems, but help empower him and/or see things as he may not have in the past, opening the door in his mind to conquer things with his wits. In Star Wars, Luke gets a mentor, Obi-Wan, and a talisman, his father's lightsaber. In Lord of the Rings, Frodo gets a mentor, Gandalf, a guardian, Sam, AND numerous talismans (Sting, the mythril coat, the vial of Galadriel, etc.) over time. In my own game, and in most campaigns, you should take the LotR approach. Sprinkle occasional mentors, guardians, talismans and what-not to help the players along and give them the confidence to face seemingly undefeatable evil, but it should never be enough to solve the problem on its own. They may win the favor of a great cyber knight, a crafty information broker, a Naruni sales rep. They may gain magic amulets, a cool specialized mech, a rune sword, a unique spell, etc.

Now, onto the part that makes up the core of your campaign:

Initiation and transformation

This, in essence, is the action. This is also where most game masters and stories are likely to falter. Why? Because the action has to MEAN SOMETHING. Not only to the plot, but to the characters.
This has five parts, but they are the most flexible part of the hero's journey model and can be mixed, matched and perverted. This is where you truly make a story your own by having fun with this section of the model. This is where the curveballs mostly come from.

The Challenge
Once you get past the threshold the heroes now face the unknown and a series of challenges. At first the challenges are very easy and are aimed at building the heroes skills and confidence. But as time progresses they get harder and harder and more complex. Along the way there are helpers and there are tempters. Sometimes it is hard to tell one from the other. Some helpers turn out to be tempters and some who appear to be tempters are actually helpers. Ultimately, the challenges seem to always be in the areas where the heroes are most insecure and at their weakest. By overcoming their biggest handicap do they progress to a new level. Luke's journey through the Death Star, the many challenges of Frodo and Arthur, these elements are the easiest to spot. This makes up the bulk of a campaign, and it should be obvious why this model works so well. The challenges start off easy, great for low level characters, and helps build them in skill and confidence (and for a player group, teamwork) so that when they start to get to the heart of the campaign and face the real nemesis they can prevail and reach their stride. In my own previous campaign, this was everything leading up to the big battle at Tryth-Sal. Traditionally, the easy period ends when they basically stare THE ENEMY in the eye and spit in it and throw down the gauntlet. My group did this by thwarting the main enemy's assault on the Lyn-Srrial, directly opposing him openly. Often, a sign that the easy part of the challenge is coming to its end is the death of the mentor. My group lost a cyber knight, Sir Charles, a few adventures before the big battle, meaning they had to be more self-reliant. One good thing about a campaign is that you can take your time with these things.

Into the Abyss
This is where we grab the edge of our seats in the theater, start turning pages faster while reading the book, or start wondering if we should not have bought just one more clip of Naruni ammunition in a campaign. This is the dark chapter of the hero's journey. They are faced with a seemingly hopeless task against staggering odds. This is where they truly earn the mantle: Hero. It must test all their skills, reach right into their weakest aspect and they must do it without support. This is where Luke faces Vader in Cloud City, Frodo leaves the fellowship to go on his own into Mordor, etc. This can be a single event, or (for campaigns) a span of events where things seem darker and darker. The challenges get harder and there's little sign of hope. But if the hero digs deep within him or herself, find their heart and knows who their friends are who their enemies are and have confidence in their abilities and have learned well, they can succeed.
In a campaign, I suggest a series of abysses, each moving the plot forward remarkably. Each teaching the hero about himself or themselves and what they can truly do when pushed to the wire. In my campaign, I try to have abysses for each player, sometimes more than one if they have trouble overcoming earlier ones.

The transformation and revelation.

You've all seen it and you all know it. "I am your father!" in Empire, Samwise's speech about "the old stories, the ones that really matter...", Arthur's knights find the holy grail.... An event that transforms the characters, reconstitutes them. They are now focused; they are now in the heart of their hero-dom. They take the fight, from here on, to the villain. They start to gain momentum. All the lessons are learned (but the enemy always has a couple surprises) and they must use what they have learned to defeat their foe. This often comes with a shocking revelation, a great betrayal, and some big surprise. This is the "dun Dun DUNNNN!" part of the story. From here on we head toward the rousing climax....

The atonement
This is what they've been waiting for...mano-a-mano with the head honcho...and a resolution to the darkness. If all goes well, the light shines through, shattering darkness, driving away villainy. Others look up and acknowledge that the hero is a hero. The hero is now comfortable with the mantle and in fact uses it to his advantage. They are at one with themselves and this is why they defeat the villain. It isn't the magic sword or the super-mega-gun or the spell, it's heart, will and confidence and courage. We see this all through return of the jedi with Luke. He is comfortable with being a jedi when he saves his friends from Jabba. He then faces Vader and the emperor and has faith in his father despite all the evil Vader has done. it pays off. This is probably the hardest thing to represent in a campaign. It takes a lot of engineering and a lot of fixing and knowing your player characters. But it often comes naturally. A level 10 mind melter or lord magus can be pretty darn confident! NPCs at this point should know who the heroes are, even if the hero doesn't know them. Favors start coming in, the momentum starts building. When the player characters call for the final showdown, a thousand voices rise behind them from all the people they've saved and impressed. The heroes have done so much for them that they have their back now. The Enemy realizes "these guys are coming for my neck!" and the final showdown is set and occurs in glorious fireworks and gripping action. With skill, luck and lots of harebrained plans and confidence, the enemy is defeated....
but that's not the end of the journey.....

The Return

Wrapping up your campaign.
This is the final stage of the journey. The hero returns to their roots either physically or metaphorically, bringing with them the "gift," what they learned and/or obtained on their journey. In mythology this is often represented by a magic object that in some way connects with knowledge and power, a metaphor for wisdom and the ability to use it.
This can have its own trials as well. Often, this is blended with a final task to overcome. The hero finds that the evil he left home to fight has taken root in his own cradle. And most often this evil is not physically powerful, but cunning and sly, forcing loved ones long left behind to turn against the hero, bringing home hard that he is now an outsider. In Lord of the Rings the hobbits return to the shire to find Grimer Wormtongue and Sauruman have taken up residence there, for example. After Hercules returns home from fighting the hydra and the lion his wife poisons him, etc. The point is that the hero has come home changed beyond what he was when he left, and that takes some adjustment.
Several outcomes can happen at this point. 1. The hero is accepted and his knowledge and gifts are used to raise the entire community. 2. He is rejected as an outsider and finds that the road he left behind is now his new home, or among the new friends and alliances he made. 3. The hero cannot adjust at all, is rejected by all because his knowledge is too much for others to hear and accept and he isolates himself from the world. Often this last leads to the hero becoming a mentor in the adventures of the next hero.
In your campaign use this as the ending to bring home how much the world has changed for the heroes since they started. Often they do not have one home, so take them back to familiar places and people which once seemed so intimidating and strange that look small now and normal. Maybe the dangerous, brutal 'Burbs they started out in seem small and petty now compared to the wide world. That CS lieutenant and his dogpack that always harassed them seem insignificant. Maybe they can return to the farm town that gave them a place to stay who lost most of its men folk to that demon and drop off a couple confiscated power armors for the town's defense. One good tactic I have found in adventures is making player characters treat the dead realistically. If one of the characters in the game died (and if there was a body left) there's a good chance there was a grave. If he died defending said village he could be a hero, with children that would be dead if not for the group playing in the street, imitating the fallen comrade.
Or maybe there is no end of this road for the group. They may break up for a while or relax and enjoy wealth and fame and heroism for a little while, but soon something else "calls" them from their comfortable existence on the road to new adventures, new journeys and new lessons learned.

Knot experienced at this

2006-03-20T06:24:00.000-05:00

So, during our adventures at the last fetish flea market my slave rae convinced me to buy 50 feet of soft, white nylon rope. She also, last Christmas, bought me a book on intricate rope bondage. Sometimes my rae likes to apply little hints....with a sledgehammer.
Okay, so I'm going to try and tackle intricate rope bondage. It's something I've always loved to look at, a girl intricately bound, and it's something I really should know as a Gorean Master, since you should be able to restrain your slave, even if struggling, with rope or leather ties in something under 15 seconds. However, there are two barriers I have to overcome.
First, intricate rope bondage can take a while to do, sometimes up to half an hour (during which, invariably, right near the end your slave will say she has to go pee), then you look at them for a few minutes, tease and play, and then let them out again. Unless you tie them in a way that they are available for use, I never saw much point besides temporarily turning them into living works of erotic art. Some things are kind of cool. I've seen girls in rope dresses and corsets. I saw two girls tied together hanging from a framework where they had to work together to get free, but if they were selfish they got more tangled. They could only pull rope ends to free themselves with their mouths, and of course the Dom had put all the important free rope ends they needed to pull in very creative places on the other girl. But, in general, never saw much point to it. Leather and steel restraints contrast nicely with the vulnerability of a slave girl, and they use buckles I can fasten in just a few seconds.
The Second thing is this: I am HORRIBLE with my hands. I think God has gifted me with many talents, of which I am extremely grateful. Overall I did pretty well in the genetic crap shoot of life. However, this is balanced out by what could nearly be considered a curse when it comes to making things, repairing things, etc. I remember when I was a kid I tried to make a model of the SDF-1. It was a beginners level model, fairly easy, or so the box said. It was an unmitigated disaster. A mess. Things were uneven, other things broke, some things just fell apart. I also did a lot of shopwork in high school. Were it not for shop class no less than half of my semesters in high school would have been 4.0.
I never got higher than a B in shop. Most of the time I got a C, and that's because there was a fair amount of book work and book tests. Fefnagale can attest to this: When you hand me a tool and something to put together, something's going to either break or explode.
And it's not just a lack of skill, it seems to be luck too. I've done demonstrations where I had me and someone else order something mechanical. If they opened it, it was fine. If I opened it, it was broken and had to be sent back to the factory. I went through three, count them, three motherboards trying to build my last computer. Two I got offline, one at a computer show. All of them didn't work when hooked up. Sending each one back, all three were confirmed defectively manufactured and my money was returned. Even the sales people were amazed.
Now, I've warned rae about this, and yet and still she trusts me so much she's willing to put her life, and delicate little limbs in my hands as I try to learn rope work. That's love and devotion for you....
Hopefully that will be enough to break the curse.

The girl in the picture is bondage model Dita Von Teese, a sub who has hit it big on the modeling scene. As far as actresses and models go she tops my list of favorites. She's mastered the "pleading eyes" look and a lot of people say no one has been along like her since Bettie Page, whom she often impersonates.

What is Gor and being Gorean?

2006-03-15T19:02:00.000-05:00

Okay, I'm going to tackle a huge mouthful today: What is Gor, and what does it mean (to me) to be Gorean.

First, let's start with the basics.
Gor is, literally, a fictional world highlighted in a series of books known as the "Chronicles of Gor" or the "Chronicles of Counter-Earth." The novels are very much like Edgar Rice Burroughs' John Carter of Mars series, in which, in most of the books, a human is transported to an alien world and "goes native" over time.
The main character in most of the books is a man by the name of Tarl Cabot, who discovers his family ancestry originates on Gor.
The novels highlight a world based on a Nietzsche-esque natural order, meaning the most talented to do something is the best one to do it. It also emphasizes taking hold of the vitality of life and all its experiences. It deals with such things as honor, respect for home, true friendship, and the true nature of humanity. One of the probably most known, and harped over, aspects is that of gender. In the Gor novels, the people of Gor have accepted that men are naturally dominant and women are naturally submissive. It also postulates that when we don't resist our inner nature we live healthier, happier lives. Therefore, in general, most women on Gor are happier, more vital, and more content being submissive to men. However, what most casual readers do not get is that the books also clearly state that individuals have different needs, desires, wants, and strengths, and nobody can be placed into one mold. In at least two instances in the Gor books a woman is ruler of a city and widely respected, loved, and in many cases, obeyed, by the men under her rule.
The books are filled with swordfighting, rescuing princesses, wars between nations, treachery, and aerial combat by buff, spear-chucking guys on giant birds, but, intermixed with the pulp action, is a pretty detailed, intricately woven philosophy on life and how it can be (perhaps should be) lived.
One thing you must know about the Gor books to understand a bit about them is who wrote them.
The author on the covers is John Norman, however, that is a pen name for Dr. John Frederick Lange, Jr., who teaches at Queens College in New York. Lange is a Doctor of Philosophy, a degree he earned at Princeton University. So the man's no slouch in the nature of humanity.
The books were written from the 60s to early 80s, and have been driven off shelves by an organized letter campaign to publishers from feminists. Guess Free Speech isn't a part of their philosophy. Note: Whenever someone wants to control what you read and what ideas you are exposed to, worry. But I digress.
The books touch deeply on numerous philosophies besides the genders.
First and foremost is this: Be what you are. Be what you are with pride, with gusto, and without shame. Life is to be lived to the fullest. You can only do that by knowing yourself and being true to yourself.
The books also are EXTREMELY pro-environmental. A Gorean warrior is proud to be able to identify every flower and tree in a garden. A gorean woodcutter plants two trees for every one he chops down. Nature is allowed to run free outside the cities, even if it means travel is a bit more dangerous. It's a better alternative than a tame world, devoid of nature.
Also, despite the war and sword-swinging and wench-capturing, intellect is highly, highly prized. In fact the most rabidly adored sport on all of Gor is The Game, which is very similar to chess. Players of The Game are like superstars, despite the fact many of them couldn't even lift a sword. A battle-hardened, seasoned warrior could be brought to near tears by a masterful manuevering of Ubara to Ubar's Scribe Three.
Another aspect strongly espoused in the Gor novels is respect for your home. This means your nation/city and your individual quarters. This is often represented in the books by an object known as a Home Stone. A, sometimes simple, at other times complex, stone that represents the heart of a city (which on Gor are like nation-states). Men are extremely proud of their city, certain their particular homeland is the best, most beautiful on Gor, and will fight to the last defending it. Raze their city to the ground, and if the Home Stone can be preserved intact, they will simply start rebuilding the next day.
Finally, there is the gender aspect. In the books a lot is talked about regarding what I call the "pussification" of Earth men. Lange postulates, through these books, that earth men have been emotionally castrated and don't know it. What's more, women, in a strive for equality, have somehow decided that being equal means being like men, thus going against their very inherent nature.
So you get a world where men are not allowed to be men and women are trying to be men, thus nobody is being themselves and nobody is truly happy.
I feel this has merit. Look around you. Turn on the television for half an hour. Watch a few commercials with couples. Find a commercial where the husband isn't the bumbling buffoon to the wife's clever witticism. Sex and the City highlighted women being women and running wild in their femininity. Can you imagine a show where men were shown being men, saying what they truly say and think amongst their buds and how they approach relationships and what they want? An uncensored show on HBO that was the opposite of sex in the city? They'd burn HBO studios down for airing something like that.
Why?
We've been raised to be ashamed to be men by society in general. One of the things that Rae says attracted her to me is that I was both extremely and unabashedly masculine, and yet at the same time intellectual. I asked her why one would assume the two concepts to be mutually exclusive, to which I do not recall her having an answer.
But think about it.
You can be geek or jock. But society doesn't want to allow you to be both. Somehow, masculinity has been linked to stupidity and buffoonism, and the heavy-handed "hint" from television, movies, schools and the like is that to be a real man you must not at all be man-ly.
Why should you not admire a woman's body? Doesn't nature dictate that it's designed for the opposite sex to admire? And what about all those comments women are allowed to publicly make regarding a man's body? Why is that okay in the office, but not a comment about a woman's legs?
Why is your love of a good fight in a hockey game frowned upon? Your enjoyment of football made into a joke? The attention to your car is poo-pooed as "boys and their toys?"
And for women, why is a woman ridiculed for actually WANTING to be a housewife, or submissive to her husband? Why is a woman told that not being interested in a career, but wanting children instead, is "wrong"? Wasn't equality about choice? if so, why are choices that go against a woman emulating a man frowned upon?
Also, why are the concepts of dominance and submissive considered inequal? Who told you that because someone is submissive they are "less" of a person than someone who is dominant?
Would you dare tell a marine that has no desire to be an officer that he's a weak, inferior submissive? I dare ya to try it...
Lange's philosophy in the Gor books specifically point out on several occasions that women are the equal of men, but they are different. We've only been at this "gender doesn't matter" idea for a couple decades. That's compared to 1 million years of evolution, learned behavior, and bred tendencies.
Let's run the clock back a few hundred thousand years to when we were still using stone tools.
Do you think that every man got to breed with any woman he wished? Or vice versa?
Of course not.
Now, who got first pick? The strongest man, obviously...be that through physical strength, or natural intelligence and an ability to lead or a combination thereof, it is undeniably true that the strongest and brightest got their pick of mates before the founding of civilization as we know it. Now, you're this impressive male and you've got your pick of the pack. Who are you going to go for? The most attractive woman that's likely to keep the cave clean, put out, and cause the least amount of problems. She'll probably strong internally, lots of intestinal fortitude so when the crapola hits the fan, you know she'll stand tall.
In all likelyhood, in most cases, the strongest and brightest men bred with the submissive, intelligent, strong women. Over, and over and over again. For a million or so years. Heck, some would argue that it was like that until about 1960.
Even in the 50s if you picked up a woman's magazine it was chocked full of articles on how to keep a good home for your man.
Now, this isn't to debate the rightness or wrongness of that. What I'm pointing out is that 50 years of women's lib doesn't have a chance in hell of erasing a pavlovian, bred, response that's been rampant and encouraged since some man-ape in africa first chucked a bone into the air.
That's not to say every woman would be happier being submissive to her man, nor would every man be happiest dominating his woman, mind, body and soul. Humanity varies. So if you're first mental response to this is "my girl doesn't fit that mold!" or "I'm no man's slave!" you need to stop, go back up to the top, and read again.
There is a tendency in the human male to desire to be dominant to his woman. There is a tendency in the human female to be submissive to a dominant man. If a man and a woman were raised, isolated from cultural input, on a desert island, in all likelyhood the male would be dominant and the woman submissive to him. That's what the theory postulates. However, that doesn't take into account television, movies, social upbringing, schoolmates, your parents and their beliefs, your religion and a whole host of other factors that make us what we are.
BUT, if you are capable of stripping all that away, and looking at yourself at your core (which very few of us can do), then, as a man, you'd likely find within yourself a strong desire to truly be dominant in your relationship, and if you are a woman, the reverse is likely to be true.
I think, for women, it's harder, because we've been taught that being submissive is bad. It has negative connotations like "doormat."
People who espouse the Gorean lifestyle have, ideally, accepted this natural part of themselves and embraced it. Gorean men, again, ideally, try to live a life of honor, and one made rich with experience and an enjoyment of life. In their relationships with women they take a strongly dominant role. Sometimes this is a Master/slave relationship...but not always. At other times it's the role of Free Companion, in which the woman takes a much less submissive role than a true slave, but still defers to the man as head of household.
One might ask, what do Gorean men look for in women?
First and foremost, intelligence. A Gorean man enjoys little more than he does talking with an intelligent woman. A Gorean man loves when an intelligent woman catches him up on something. He finds her that much more appealing. A Gorean man lets his woman's thoughts be expressed fully, encourages her imagination and learning. He obviously enjoys a beautiful woman, but defining beauty amongst Goreans is little different than among any other men. However, Gorean men do have a tendency to like their women a little more curvy than current societal emphasis. Given a choice between an underfed Kate Moss and an Anna Nicole Smith who could stand to lose a few (just going on body type in this example) most gorean men would go with the girl with more curves than less. Most men who actually have had a woman in his arms tend to agree with us, I believe.
So, we're not looking for ditzes. In fact, we usually can't stand them.
Slave or Free Companion, the girls that tend to be highly sought after, and who seem to flourish and do well in a Gorean lifestyle is one that is INTELLIGENT.
Now, if you explore around you'll find that there is an online gorean community.
Unfortunately, we don't have any control over who calls themselves Gorean.
You'll more than likely run into an idiot who calls himself Master this or Master that, claims to be a Warrior Caste, believes all women should be enslaved tomorrow and then will send you scurrying to fetch him a goblet of "ka-la-na" at room temperature. This obviously thrilling experience will end with him offering you his online collar, which will consist of you putting his intials in brackets behind your name and waiting around alot faithfully online while he's signed on under a different name cybering some other slave whose most likely a man in cyber disguise.
Can ya tell I've had my fill of online Gor?
First and foremost, Gorean philosophy dictates life is to be lived. Therefore, if you find someone who spends 20 hours a day in an online Gor chatroom with his online slave drinking online drinks, think carefully before you consider that man Gorean.
When I was writing my novel, I got roped into it for a while, simply because I was at home all the time writing, and the same for when I was freelancing and only needed to work a couple weeks every three months. What I discovered was this: There are quite a few intelligent, truly submissive women out there who are itching to be in the hands, and possibly collar, of a true Gorean man, but they are few and far between.
I once had a girl who was originally trained by one of the authors of the book Different Loving visit me to see if a possible Master/slave relationship might work. For several reasons, it didn't work out. But she told me that her mentor said there may be a dozen true Masters in the country and she thought I was one of them. I was the only one she'd met in her search after over a decade. Now, I can't tell you if she was right about her assessment of me, and I don't want the above to stand as some testament to my abilities as a Master or a Gorean. I only say it to point out that men who've found, and are comfortable, with that place in themselves are rare. They are likely more rare than the women that seek them.
Women, being in general more attuned to their emotions, often are able to come to terms and fall into that submissive side of themselves, despite the fact that at the beginning it is a harder concept for them to consider. Men tend to resist it. They don't want to be seen a chauvanistic, misogynistic (which is as far away from Gorean as you can get...if you hate or dislike women, Gor isn't for you), or simply as being thoroughly, and unabashedly, male.
And, in a way, that's okay.
It's one reason that, through the years, I've had my pick of the litter....

For me, this encapsulates much of my thoughts and feelings on Gor. Ask someone else and they'll tell you a slightly different variation. That should come as no surprise. There are 6 billion human beings on this planet, and I strongly believe that, albeit sometimes the nuances are lost, that there are 6 billion distinctly different views on every subject under the Sun.

The above views are mine.
Your mileage may vary.

A typical night out

2006-03-12T09:30:00.000-05:00

Ugh, can't believe I'm awake writing this thing. We didn't get to bed until after 3 a.m. last night...and didn't get to sleep until some time later, heh.
It was a long, good day.
Unfortunately, it started out with us having to work from 7 a.m. until 11 a.m. But it was easy and it was extra money and overtime.
After we got home and took care of things around the house (and rae snuck in a quick nap) we headed down to the leather fetish flea market.
It's all the way down in D.C., takes about an hour to get there from Baltimore. We had decided to shop, come back home, get dressed up and then go to the party later that evening.
We didn't really dress up to shop too much. Rae went for the frisky look, with a little white, gauzy asian-styled shirt and black flared mini-skirt and pothole fishnet stockings. You know the ones? Not normal fishnets but the ones that are like made of thin yarn and have the huge holes? Good lord I love a woman's legs in those things.
Once we navigated the terrors of D.C. traffic we lucked up on a good parking space outside of the Crucible, the local dungeon. It's a nice, big place, well-kept. They keep expanding on it, which is very welcome. This time the newest addition was a huge upstairs level. There were about 300 people or so there I think when we got there. And people were regularly going in and out. We got there about 3 p.m.
Now, over the last couple weeks, rae has been working with chainmail. She made herself chainmail bracelets, a chainmail collar hung with bits of hematite and a chainmail lead (another word for leash...one end attaches to her collar and the other end stays in my hand). She got a lot of comments on them, with people asking her where she got the beautiful leash. She's thinking now about making some to sell.
So, we get in and pay for both the flea market and the play party that night.
Rae makes a beeline for The Shoe Guy (that's actually what he calls himself).
He has a multitude of women's shoes, each one with a girl's name. She was after some thigh-high boots, which, as you can see from the picture, she got. They're really gorgeous on her legs....since she has killer legs. And she says they're pretty comfortable, even with the heel. Although the leather is still stiff around the knee and will be until she's worn them in a bit.
After that it was like we lost our minds. I got a new 4', 16-plait single-tail by a well-known maker. Feels good in my hands. But rae hasn't experienced a single-tail yet and it's rather intense, so I didn't use it on her that night.
We also got personally embroidered shirts. She got a pink tank top with "Master ______'s toy" in bold black letters (______ being my first name, of course). And I got a black one with just "Master _____" and a silhouette of a chained slave over the left breast.
I also caved in to some serious begging and got her another pair of shoes, these look exactly like the ruby slippers from the Wizard of Oz, except that they're black and have a bit more heel.
I also got some soft, treated, white rope, as she recently bought me a book on rope bondage and is eager for me to start practicing on her. I've always admired the japanese rope bondage (a.k.a. nawa shabiri) experts, but I don't have the patience to take 20 minutes to tie a girl up prettily, get turned on, and then take another 20 minutes to set her free so I can do something about it.
But, a friend there told me a local rope bondage expert was giving seminars soon on how to tie a girl up in intricate rope bondage in a way where you can have access to any part of her you want. I like that idea.
We'll see if I take to it or not, I never was good with knots.
Finally, we got this little asian-styled dress for her, blue with black trim. It's a mini-sasong...the chinese girl's dress that Kristen Dunst wears at the parade in Spiderman is a good example. Except this one only falls to mid-thigh...nice for showing off those new boots.
That's all I can REMEMBER us buying. We left with so many bags that other people were commenting on them.
I got to introduce her to several friends, and as this had been the first time I seriously was out to hobnob since my split with my last slave I rather enjoyed it.
One thing about the flea markets that's probably unusual to vanilla lifestyle people (that's what we call non-alternative lifestyle folks...normals) is that when a woman at a leather fetish flea market wants to try on that little silver mini-corset and matching miniature shorts, she usually strips down right there in the middle of the crowd and tries it on. I'm sure the dealers do this on purpose. A friend of mine, sherry, who is quite a looker and has one of those barbie doll bodies, tried on the exact outfit above in the middle of the aisle. This thing is gripping her ass like a sailor who just got into port and has her tits presented like a buffet and she has the nerve to ask her master, Steve, if he likes the outfit. Before he could answer I grabbed Steve's wrist, felt for a pulse and told her "Yes." Because if the man didn't, I'd have declared him officially dead.
So, 6 p.m. rolled around and the flea market closed up. It was back to Baltimore where rae got dressed in the outfit in the picture. She also had on, which you can't really see here, a silver belt covered with clamshell bells, so that when she walked they chimed like a belly dancer. She looked quite exotic.
We grabbed some dinner, packed the playbag and drove back down. We got back to the Crucible by about 10 p.m. just as things were getting into full swing.
Now, many of you have no idea how things play out at a bdsm play party, so I'll run it down for you.
The Crucible, is set up into several large areas. The main floor has most of the bdsm furinture on it that people use. Spanking benches (kind of like a padded saw horse that the girl straddles, leaving her rear very exposed...usually the slave is cuffed to it), St. Andrew's Crosses (They look like a big "X", with rings for cuffs and other goodies at various places), suspension rigs and massage tables and cages.
We walk in and put our coats up and there's a place for your play bag to go until you want to play and find an open piece of furniture (which is rather difficult given the crowd). First thing we see when we come in is that some Mistress has put her male slave in a schoolgirl outfit in a cage that only allows you to stand, hands cuffed with a ballgag. Different strokes and all that...
Off to the side there's a girl who probably weighs about 100 lbs. in a mini-skirt and 6'inch heels on her knees crawling after her Master. I didn't mention a top because there wasn't one.
All the equipment is in use so we wander around so rae can see various things. One thing that catches her eye is a vacuum bag. Basically it's two layers of latex on a square frame attached to a vacuum pump. The sub or slave gets into it and then all the air is sucked out. It's allegedly the ultimate in full-body bondage, as basically every inch of your body is bound by the latex. Personally, I think it makes you look like you've been frozen in carbonite.
There are various girls and guys being whipped, flogged, tickled (tickle torture is devious...imagine being bound and unable to get away from someone who knows all your tickle spots), bound, etc.
The owner of the Crucible has had a novel idea and has caged off an area for single-tail use. That's good, because novices who are curious sometimes wander too close to a Master whipping his slave. A couple years ago I had a guy walk right in front of me as I was using mine. Everyone says I should have just let him have it one good time.
We chat with people here and there. The girl who plays Arcana in my HU2 game is there and quite a few people I haven't seen in a while. The organizer of the local multicultural munch (a get together for interracial BDSM couples in the area...there are that many) and one of the organizers for BlackBeat, an african-american themed bdsm annual event, are there and I find out that they are going to have some joint munches in the near future, so I'm thinking of taking rae to a few so she can get to meet more people in the lifestyle.
There's also a big deal coming up called Camp Crucible, which is an extended memorial day weekend camp, off in the hills, for BDSM'ers. No real rules, no laws to worry about, just 1,000 S&M fetishists at a well-equipped camp in the woods going nucking futs. The stories from Camp Crucible are often legendary.
But it's rather expensive, and coming up right behind a planned trip to Michigan, it might have to wait until next year for us.
We eventually luck up and find a spanking bench coming up free. I loop rae's leash around the arm of it while I go get the play bag. For her it seems like a long, intense session with the floggers, some hand spanking, a pinwheel and some edge play with a matching pair of chinese knives. I'm always telling her that I'm working her up and that I'm going light, which she can hardly believe.
However, after I let her up after about 45 minutes and she's talking about the intensity of the session, my friend James comes up and goes "whoa, you done already?" and I tell him that rae's new and he comments that he expected me to be there for another half hour...and rae's eyes bug out a bit as she feels like she was taken quite toward her endurance limit.
I wrap her up in a flannel aftercare blanket (subs and slaves tend to get very cold after a session, they also mentally are a bit "somewhere else" for a few, so most conscientious Masters and Mistresses wrap them up in an aftercare blanket and cuddle them for a while til they come back down to earth). I do so with rae in the upstairs area, which has been converted to a large aftercare zone with warm, low lighting, comfortable couches and chairs and tables. We find a big, overstuffed chair and she curls up in my lap for a while.
Afterwards, when she's feeling more herself again, we run into a Master, Mistress and slave that I haven't seen in a long time. The slave, whom everyone just calls "pet", had a bad Master who was a deadbeat and she had to get rid of him. He cost her her house. Then he stalked her for a while. But the BDSM community is pretty tight, so there was a good safety net for her and she's about back on her feet.
She's owned by the couple now and has had a collar made so that when it was finished she was wearing it...meaning that it will never come off unless you break out the metal cutters.
Her Master, Mistress, and I used to triple team her with an electrical device called a violet wand. Basically it's a hand-held miniature generator with a variety of glass vacuum tubes in various shapes. They are filled with gas that lights up violet when current is running through it and when you bring it close to the skin it gives an electrical zap...like the sensation you get when you walk across the carpet and touch the doorknob. Only difference is that the intensity varies and the zap is a steady constant rain of zaps, as opposed to one quick jolt.
Also, you can ground yourself or the slave and become electrified yourself. This means anyone you touch will get a steady zap. It also means any metal objects you pick up can be used to zap someone. We decide to toss rae and pet onto the couch together naked, they break out the violet wand set, and pretty soon we've got both girls squirming all over each other. Rae's never felt a violet wand before, as my last slave made off with my last set. It takes all of the first two minutes before she wants me to invest in another one...soon!
At one point the other Master is using a small rounded metal medical instrument, running the tip across pet's back, I've got a small dagger giving shocks across rae's legs and the Mistress has an ingenious glove similar to Freddy Kruger's (but far more elegant and less scary) that she's dragging across both girl's breasts. The noises those two girls made would have made most porn stars proud.
Then the two slaves discover that sucking on each other's nipples takes up an all new dimension when you're electrically charged, and the three of us sit back and watch the show for a bit.
All three of us then attack rae and it's not long before she goes off like a bottle rocket...then the three of us focus on pet and in five minutes she's off the couch and on the floor recuperating.
Finally, they show rae and I something new....fire play. Basically you take flash cotton, which magicians use to make flames suddenly leap from their hands, and you twist it into small fuses. Then you lay an intricate pattern on the girl's body. The thing about flash cotton is that it burns very intense, but it all goes up the instant you touch it to flame. So we decorate pet's body with a big flash cotton design, surrounding both nipples, running down her belly with swirls and loops. Then FWOOSH! the whole thing burns off in less than a second...too fast to burn the skin, but giving the sub the quick sensation of actually being on fire.
I wouldnt' think that's a plus in it's favor, but pet certainly likes it...and I know rae loves to have hot wax dripped on her....so I get the location of the magic shop they buy it from for future use.
It's getting close to closing at this point and we notice a pretty little slave asleep by herself in a chair in the corner. I go over and quietly nudge her and ask her where her owner is and if she's aware it's almost time to go.
She sleepily tells me that her Mistress is a "switch" and that she's tied up (literally)at the moment.
I nod and she thanks me for waking her and for caring.
Now, this has run long, but I'm going to take a moment to rant about "switches". I don't have anything against them, but if you are going to have a slave in your care then you really need to be consistently dominant. There's no way in hell I'd leave rae alone, asleep in a chair on another floor while I went to get "tied up" by somebody else. First of all, slaves need consistency from their owners. You are their rock of Gibralter, emotionally. They are really putting themselves out there by submitting to someone. A steady hand is needed to own. If you are giving up control of yourself to someone, how can you truly have control over them?
Second, what if something happens while the Mistress is tied up? Intricate suspension bondage can be risky. And it takes a long time to get into and out of.
And here's her slave, sleep, alone, on the other side of a dungeon the size of a large warehouse. I mentioned the fact that there should be a rule that if you abandon your slave for an hour at an event like this the first person who finds her should get to keep her. Rae didn't look thrilled at the idea....heh.
She got dressed again, we exchanged e-mails with pet and her owners and finally got ready to go.
It was a long ride home, as I was wore out. But rae was a good girl and stayed awake and we talked about the event and kept me company. We thought about hitting Denny's but with rae looking like Inara on a leash and it being 3 a.m. we decided against it.
So, I'd say that's fairly typical of a saturday night at a BDSM event. rae's interested now in becoming members at the Crucible and attending regularly, so needless to say she enjoyed herself. I know I did.

Whips and boots

2006-03-10T22:53:00.000-05:00

Tonight, rae and I are getting ready for a BDSM event on Saturday night. It's actually a dual-sort of event, a flea market in the day time, where you can buy all sorts of kinky accessories and essentials, and a "play party" later in the evening.
This will be rae's first real public debut to the local bdsm scene. As a Gorean, I am not huge on public play parties and the like, but it's nice to get out once in a while to talk with others without having to edit your language and behavior.
Some BDSM'ers find Goreans a bit too "edgy" for them. For a lot of BDSM'ers, the philosophical aspect, the emotional depth of Gor, runs too deep. There's never a time, for example, that rae is not my slave, except when we are at work. Even then it's just in stealth mode. Also, it's very gender-oriented. Gorean philosophy dictates that women are naturally submissive and men naturally dominant. Since the BDSM culture has a lot of dommes (most of you would probably know them as dominatrixes), they tend to not be too comfortable with that line of thought. But the alternative lifestyle scene requires you have a lot of mental flexibility. It took me a long time to get used to seeing men bowing and scraping at the feet of women half their size. That just ain't me. But it's them, and as long as they are being true to themselves and happy, no complaints. There's very much a "I'll respect your lifestyle if you respect mine" attitude in the local BDSM scene, which I'm glad of.
But there are some jarring differences between Goreans and BDSM lifestylers. I won't get into the core, major differences, but they are rather broad. But I'll deal with the ones that particularly make attending events interesting. Goreans don't, in general, use limits, safe words and the like. But that's because, for one thing, she's mine and I'll use her as I wish, and for another, once you know each other in and out, you don't need them. She knows me well enough to know that I'm not going to ask her to do anything that puts her in jeopardy. If anything, I probably tend toward coddling her. Also, there's little need of a "safe word" since neither of us will "play" with anyone else. We know each other's dance quite well, and she's never found it difficult to tell me when something's wrong. I usually know before she's ready to say it, just by reading her body language.
Gorean slaves, in general, do not act "bratty"...or do things to incite their Masters to punish them...something some, but certainly not all, BDSM girls often partake in.
In fact, I'm different from many Goreans simply for the fact that I, and rae, enjoy erotic pain play. Many Goreans will only pull out the whip if the slave has made a grave error. But none of us fit perfectly into any label...I am no different.
She might contest it, but I think rae's a bit nervous about tomorrow.
She's been to the flea market before, but last time there was a big party she wasn't feeling well so we did not attend. This is a debut of sorts for her.
Rae's been working all week on hand-making a set of chainmail slave bracelets and a chainmail collar and leash. She's done with all of them now, really, the last thing she's going to do is set them off with little dangling bits of hematite.
Tomorrow, she will be gorgeous.
About once a week, she and I have what she calls "dress-up night". She comes to me and begs to know what look would please me that night....and I tell her slutty, or naughty, or innocent, or exotic, and she goes and creates that look for me and serves me.
Tomorrow I've commanded her to make herself up like she did when she first knelt to me and offered herself to me.
How can I describe her in her elegant sensual look?
Think Inara from the television series Firefly, and Phaedre from the Kushiel's Dart books.
No, I'm not exaggerating. I think I'll take pictures...just because no one will believe it otherwise.
She really has nothing to be nervous about.
In the afternoon, our goals are to buy me a new single-tail, or signal whip. For the uninitiated, a signal whip is 3-4 feet long, about half the length of a bull whip, and us usually used in cracking competition, thus the term signal whip.
Generally, the more plaits of leather used to braid the whip, the higher the quality. They usually run in 8, 12, 16, or 20 plait whips. I'm hunting for a good 16-plait, 4-foot signal whip.
Rae has a goal too. There's a guy who attends these things whom everyone just calls "The Shoe Guy" who sells every kind of woman's shoe imaginable. She's already contacted him and he's going to set aside a pair of soft mat black leather boots that will go up to about rae's mid-thigh, about where a woman's stocking tops would be, and lace up the front.
We have some breathing room on money, so I'll probably pick up a good paddle too.
I figure a lot of those reading this have never been to a bdsm event or have any clue what one is like, so Sunday or Monday, when I have the time, I'll recap the event so you have an idea what exactly goes on. What you see on television, usually, is grossly distorted. For one thing, television and movies almost never portray the man as dominant. It's seen as "okay" if it's some woman in a corset whipping some guy, but it's "wrong" if it's some guy breaking out the flogger on a girl...no matter how much she's enjoying or begging for it, society in general can't wrap it's brain around it.
In truth, most of the couples at play parties are male-dominant and female-submissive. And in the DC area, probably in large part due to the fact that it's "chocolate city", there's a very large percentage of black male dominants and white female submissives.
That's a visual I really doubt america ever really wants to see. No matter how non-racist the country claims to be, the US of A isn't ready to see a black man with a white woman over his knee, panties around her ankles and red-bottomed.

A thought: When it's socially acceptable for the entertainment media to show women beating men, belittling men, humiliating men, but not the other way around...is that really gender equality?

the only movie I've seen that even comes close to actually showing a dominant/submissive relationship was The Secretary, with James Spader. However, both characters in that have some issues they are working through. But it's hollywood and it's a drama so they have to. Having them both be perfectly stable, like many D/s couples, wouldn't make for good drama. But it's the only movie I've seen that takes the topic seriously and also has a male in the dominant role.
It must be late because I'm rambling. I'll fill you in on what a bdsm party's like after this weekend.

Dark Lord's Dating Tips, volume one

2006-03-08T08:13:00.000-05:00

More than one person asked, as soon as I started to blog, "when will you do the dating tips?"
Well, here ya go.

Let's deal with this in a chronological manner. Today we are going to handle the approach and the chat-up.
Perhaps the hardest of all is the "cold approach". When you walk up to a girl who is a perfect stranger in an environment that's not automatically conducive to people hooking up.
First, check yourself. Do you LOOK like somebody she might want to talk to? Do you look like somebody anyone might want to talk to? Are your clothes reasonably clean? Your hair (if any) neat...or at least fashionably unkempt? Did you brush your teeth and wash your ass this morning? If not, maybe now isn't the time to practice your game skills. If so, proceed. The last thing you want is to walk up to her and have her look at you and say "Sorry, I don't have any spare change."
Now, you need an ice-breaker. Something to get her talking.
Be aware of opportunities. Look and see what has her interest. Also, take a good look at what she's wearing and what she's doing. If she's dressed in all black with pale make-up and an intricate celtic cross reading an Anita Blake novel in Star Bucks then your approach is going to be a touch different than if she's dressed in a business suit with a briefcase waiting for the metro.
But one thing that's universal can always be applied: You can get your foot in the door if you make her laugh.
Now, there's a certain kind of laugh you're gunning for. It's not the type where she's laughing AT you! Seems obvious, but I've seen guys try this tactic. They bring attention to something stupid they just did with some self-effacing humor. Rarely does it work. Remember, at it's core, interaction between the sexes is governed on a subconscious level by who you think it would be best to breed with. Nobody wants the clumsy or stupid gene added to their bloodline.
No, what you want is a witty observation on life. Something that gives the feeling that the TWO of you stand apart from the clueless masses of humanity around you.
Everyone wants to feel that they are separate from the rest of the herd. If you can make them feel like you sense that in them, and have that quality yourself, you're halfway there.
Also, remember, at all times, BE CONFIDENT. Not arrogant, but confident. You should approach self-assured. Show no fear! She's not going to bite unless you're extremely successful. Also, if you get a rejection, not only are you in no worse shape than you were before you approached her, but you just gained valuable experience.
Remember that if any guy sees you get shot down, they likely were admiring you for having the guts to approach her in the first place...something they themselves didn't do.
Women can smell a lack of confidence like a shark smells blood in the water. Except that it's anathema to them. Stand proud and approach confidently.
Okay, so you've sauntered up and made your George Carlin-esque observation and gotten a giggle. Now it's time to strike up a conversation.
By strike up a conversation I mean: Get her talking.
Ask a question, related to your place and circumstances, that cannot be answered by a yes or no answer.
If you have her interest you'll know because she'll be talkative...unless she's naturally shy, in which case she'll kind of bumble a bit, but still seem interested.
Look for these signs:
1. She puts away whatever she was doing to focus on you.
2. She leans in closer to communicate.
3. She straightens her hair subconsciously.
4. She smiles a GENUINE smile.
5. She nods a lot with what you are saying.
In the course of this conversation, if there's a lull and you're not sure what to say, very quickly introduce yourself, as if you've forgotten (you save the introduction for this moment). Don't ask her name. She'll tell you or she won't. If she doesn't, you're not there yet. If she does, you're on your way. Watch out for the words "my boyfriend" or "my husband" in the conversation. If that comes up politely disengage without being rude. Never rub another man's rhubarb.

Now, depending on your level of confidence, the situation, and how long you talk and how well it goes, ask for her phone number, and see if she's interested in going out.
You can delay this if you're someplace she regularly attends, like a coffee house, and just ask when she's usually there. Don't be obvious about it, just say something like "Oh, I hadn't seen you around here before. First time?" (unless it isn't, in which case you note that you'd seen her wherever from time to time). Now, again, watch for the response. If she very quickly volunteers detailed information, like her entire work schedule, it's likely that she's volunteering that information for a reason.
I once had a girl I met at a techno coffee house in Detroit not only tell me when she'd likely be there again, but inform me that if she wasn't there (the place was called Ascension U.K.) then I should check with the door man at City Club a few blocks away, and she also mentioned where she usually could be found inside.
I took it as a good sign she wanted to see me again.

Now, you've scored either a way to see her again, or the seven digits. Good job!

Next time I'll tackle how to ask for the first date and how the date should go down.

(of course, us Goreans have an entirely different way of approaching women, but for the guys who need the above tips, if I were to tell you my way of approaching MY kind of girl you're head would probably explode)

Creativity is a two-edged sword

2006-03-05T23:31:00.000-05:00

Don't worry...I'll discuss the girl later......

I'm currently going through a bout of creativity. Probably one of the reasons I started this blog. I've got a dozen ideas in my head that I think are cool. Many I have no means of expressing, for the others there's writing. I've got book ideas, RPG ideas both old and new, a friend of mine and I are thinking of teaming up with a local comic book artist and taking a run at the comic book industry (which would be my second attempt), I've got ideas for three different campaigns in three different role-playing games, plus new ideas for the one I'm running, and toying with penning down some of my horror sci-fi screenplay ideas (I'd like to do a respectable rendition of some of HP Lovecraft's works, among others).
That's all well and good except for one problem: These ideas always come to me between the hours of 10 p.m. and 6 a.m.
Creativity and insomnia have always gone hand in hand with me. I'm not really sure why. I suspect it's like that with a lot of people.
By nature, it seems our minds tend to work, and think, differently at night. In the dark, the impossible becomes a little more possible. At night, imagination gains a slight advantage on reason.
Why is that? Could it be that in the day time the sun and the blue sky seals us and our thoughts...our perceptions...inside the atmosphere of the earth? Our minds, perhaps, feel contained, locked away from the rest of a universe filled with infinite possibilities.
But at night the blue curtain peels back and the universe is opened before us. The moon and stars serve to remind us that we are tiny, and that we live in a dimension of infinite possibility.
The world, also, gets quiet. If you live in the city, like I do, traffic dies down after a certain time and once I tuck rae into bed and she drifts off, there is nothing to derail my train of thought.
I can sit here, recline, and unfetter my imagination.
If that's true, though, then I'd have this problem/boon all the time, and I don't.
It comes in bursts and spurts. Sometimes sustained, other times brief.
I can always conjure up a bit of creative writing on demand. You kind of have to in my career. But there are times when I know what I'm writing will be rather special.
This time however, I'm having trouble figuring out where to focus that energy. I really don't need to start anything new.
I've got a completed novel I'm trying to sell, I've got three or four ideas I'm thinking of taking to the Palladium Open House to pitch at Kevin Siembieda and the gang there, two of them are halfway completed already, and I just had a great idea that would change the direction of the book series that I want to, some day, define me as a writer.
I don't talk about this book series much, it's sort of my opus. I put it together piece by piece, and I'm afraid in a way, that I'll jinx it....but what the heck.
I want to do three trilogies, set in the same fantasy world, where the reader will have trouble distinguishing science and magic and where some things which start out as one end up being the other. And yes, I'm being intentionally vague. However, one thing I've always wondered when reading Forgotten Realms books, Dragonlance books, The Lord of the Rings and the like, is this: What happens when a fantasy world "grows up"?
What if the elves and magic never left. They stayed right through the renaissance age, through the industrial revolution of a world and right into it's equivalent of the modern day.
What happens to the dungeons and the dragons after the advent of gunpowder. Would that old temple of elemental evil be a tourist spot, or, thousands of years later, would gun-toting adventurers follow their sword-bearing ancestors into dank forgotten necropolises where the dead still walk?
The first trilogy of this series would be fairly traditional, but at a cusp of technology and philosophy. The second trilogy would be within a renaissance period that's turning rapidly into an industrial revolution. The final trilogy would take place as this fantasy world and it's occupants have moved out of the castles and into the high-rises. Where mages work at designing spells that keep your car running smoothly and rangers are crack paramilitary units as likely to parachute behind enemy lines as they are to slip stealthly through a quiet forest.
I want to be published first before I do that. Published in the novel industry anyway. I've already been published a couple thousand times after 14 years of mostly daily news reporting. But it's not the same.
Anyway, I wonder how long this creative spurt will last, and what the results will be. Sometimes it dies out and, if the project isn't pressing, I'll hang it up til the next one. But with the Open House coming up I want to get some stuff out and done that I've had sitting around.
It's also inspiring that a few people have asked me about them.
I get little PMs and e-mails saying "hey, you still working on Coalition of Magic?" or "Do you have the map to Nightside and some more info?"
Sometimes that's the mental push I need. It makes my subconscious chime in and say "Hey, get off your fat, lazy ass, turn off the computer game, and finish some projects."
It really helps when people do that.
That's enough for tonight. One of the ideas I want to pursue one day is a screenplay adaptation of the poem "Rime of the Ancient Mariner."
If you haven't read it I suggest it strongly.
Oh, and here's something just to screw with your head. That girl at the top of this post that you've been drooling over....it's Soleil Moon Frye.
Punky Brewster.

Do we communicate to speak, or to listen?

2006-03-02T19:03:00.000-05:00

I happen to do a lot of posting on boards and such, and as a freelance reporter, it's my job to talk to people and to listen to them, sometimes to get them to say things that they really shouldn't be telling me. One thing that has always bothered me about us as a social species is our penchant to converse not with the goal of listening, but of being heard.
Nowhere is this more prevalent than on internet chat boards and rooms, where there is political, social and other forms of debate. Far too often, people post to be heard, as opposed to actually expose themselves to other views. I am not immune to this. I don't think anyone is.
On one board I post to quite often, we're quite divided into our little (mostly political) camps. Liberal or conservative, republican or democrat. We have some quite rousing debates about what's going on in the world. However, except for a few notable cases, I doubt many of us are actually learning something from the other side. Which is too bad.
Why? Because we're not there to listen, we're there to be heard by the other side. That, I think, is a loss of opportunity.
What ends up happening is that, in lieu of actually reading what someone with an opposing viewpoint has said, the person instead just blanket categorizes that person's argument based on past discussions or what others in that particular "group" are likely to say. Case in point, a few weeks ago on the board I usually post on, there was a thread I started regarding child slavery on cocoa farms in West Africa. Someone responded with a comment regarding all Africans.
Now, my response was that this incident was confined to a few small countries, and that Africa is a continent, not a country, with diverse people. You can no more generalize what Liberians do to what Rwandans do than you can with the French and Hungarians.
However, because we had debated the role of Africans in the slave trade in the past, this person automatically assumed that my post was in some way trying to minimalize the role of africans in that particular slave trade and became a bit indignant when I said that wasn't what I was talking about. You see, this person didn't read what I wrote, he read what he expected me to write. He didn't read the viewpoint I was expounding, he read between lines that weren't there.
I'm not picking on this person specifically, we all do it. I do it. You probably do it too.
The internet has provided humanity with an incredible means of communicating, spreading ideas, learning from one another, and growing as a species. But to fully utilize it, we're all going to have to make a stronger effort at actually listening to what others are saying. After all, if you are not listening to what others are saying, what are the odds that they are listening to you?
So, next time you get ready to respond to that post here's my advice. Take a breath, wash what other conversations you and that person have had in the past from your mind, and look at what they've posted word-for-word, without reading other aspects into it. If you *think* they are trying to lead to some familiar ground, why not simply ask them: "Is this what you are getting at?"
Then, take them at their word until they prove you different.
It might be that your suspicions were correct. It might be that they are not. But there's a chance you might learn something new. And if you make a habit of listening, there's a chance the habit might spread.

Red meat and the war in Iraq

2006-02-28T20:22:00.000-05:00

Double whammie tonight.

First of all, I've decided to give up red meat until Easter. It's part of my effort to really reconnect with my spiritual side, which hasn't really been speaking to me as of late.
It also has to do with the fact that a recent doctor's visit revealed I've put on a few more pounds than I like.
Now, for some of you, maybe giving up red meat for an extended period of time is no big deal. For me, it's huge. It's enormous. It's colossal. Remember when David Blaine stood on that lampost in Central Park for like two days? This is bigger than that. If humans are made up of 70 percent water, than my remaining 30 percent is divided between 5 percent vital organs and bones, and 25 percent ground beef and steak. I love my red meat. I am an unabashed carnivore. Always have been and always will be. You'll get my quarterpounder with cheese when you pry it from my cold, dead, high-cholesterol hand.
But I've always felt a desire to not have anything have a hold on me. I don't like being in anything's power. I quit smoking cold turkey this summer after about 8 years of pack-a-day smoking because I didn't like the fact that it controlled my actions. Probably the dominant side of me that always wants to be in charge. So, red meat falls into that category. So I am casting it aside. It will test my will power, and rae, my poor slave, will probably suffer as much as I will, from having a cranky Master. But fasting and sacrifice always worked in the old days when people wanted to reconnect with God, so here's hoping that being prime rib deficient will help put me back on the Jesus short list (I know it takes more than that, but not going to go into all my other efforts today).

Now, I've been watching the news coming out of Iraq with some dread. Everybody's tossing the words "Civil War" around. Originally, I supported the war. I believed Bush (one of my "what the fuck was I thinking moments") when he came up and started talking about WMDs and yellow cakes of uranium and all that. But it wasn't long until I started rethinking my position. At the time I was a reporter on the Hill and I heard things and got a lot of different viewpoints. It didn't take long for me to change my view completely. I think it was a big freakin' mistake and about two years ago I predicted that Iraq's most likely path is civil war.
You see, Iraq isn't a country that was founded by its own people, first of all. It's a false creation of the United Kingdom. The Kurds, Sunnis and shiites never said "Hey, let's all live together and make a great country called Iraq!" In fact, they'd rather have nothing to do with one another.
They were forced together so that European powers could more easily manage oil extraction for their benefit. Much like what happened in Africa in regards to diamonds and gold. All that infighting in Africa is because different groups of people were forced to be one nation or another with people they historically never got along with. Usually for some very good reasons. We're seeing Africa go through its growing pains because it's shaking off imperialism. Basically, it's like a spring that's been held compressed for 300 years or more. When you let go, either rapidly or slowly, it's going to revert to its original shape, one of least resistance for its components. For us humans, that means civil war, strife, the break-up of nations and realignment of power.
This is, I feel, what will happen in Iraq. The Sunnis don't want to live with the Shiites, and everyone knows the Kurds want their own nation. The Shiites, in many cases, would rather be Iranians. And, honestly, who are we to say they can't?
The unfortunate part is that these realignments rarely happen without a lot of bloodshed, and quite often the people who end up in power are the ones we really, really would rather not have there.
I think, in the end, the only really good allies we're going to get out of this is the kurds. And that's if we don't screw them over by siding with Turkey when they want to form their own nation (which will eventually happen...we're just putting off the inevitable on that one). The Iranians will back the shiites, and if we interfere the Iraqi Shiites will scream that we're favoring the sunnis. The sunnis contain a lot of the old baathists and would very likely propel Saddam or someone close to him back to power if they could. So, in a civil war that means we either, in essence, help the Iranians or help Saddam's old crew. Or we could leave them all to kill each other or try to stop both of them, meaning that both sides will be ticked off at us, believing we favored one for the other.
The sunnis are already going to cry foul if real fighting breaks out. Most of those guys we trained and gave new equipment to in order to restart the Iraqi military are shiites. So we've given them the training and gear to help them kill lots and lots of sunnis. Something the sunnis will never let us forget.
The only good part about all this is that neither side is likely to tie itself close to al queada. At least I hope not.
And, when the smoke clears, everyone is going to blame us.

About the hair...

2006-02-27T15:48:00.000-05:00

Upon seeing my picture someone asked why it was that only, or usually only, black men can get away with shaving their heads.
It made me wonder a couple things. 1.) Where does the concept come from that we are just "cooler" with our heads shaved, and 2.) what's the big worry about losing your hair anyway?

First of all, I really don't think black men have cornered the market of being bald. I've known plenty of white guys that looked just fine bald. There are a couple issues, however, with how you go about going bald. It's not just a matter of shaving your head to the skin and that's that. No way.
Going bald on purpose is a strategic style initiative undertaken by the brave, confident and dilligent.
First of all, I think one of the reasons for the whole "black guys look better" thing is skin color...not just the fact that we're black, but because quite often white men's scalp skin is a slightly different shade than the rest of their face. This can be easily cured by going bald right at the start of summer and letting your head get used to it. Otherwise the color difference is like a big arrow aiming down at your shiny chrome dome and you look like you're on your way to your next chemo treatment.
Another reason is that we have naturally dark hair, which also ties into the strategy that goes behind going bald. If you're gonna go bald, grow a beard or mustache. It balances out the uniformity of this bald, featureless head with a face sitting in the middle of it. The darker the hair, the more it detracts from any negatives for being bald. And the facial hair, particularly dense facial hair, lets everyone know you could grow a whole mess o' hair if you wanted to. You choose not to. No facial hair leads to people looking at you and going "oh, what happened to your hair?"
And, as I said, the darker the hair the better. A blonde guy with a mustache and a bald head doesn't usually pass the bald test (that being whether, occasionally, a hot woman comes along and wants to feel your head...if this ever happens to you then you know going bald was the right move). Hair that's too pale, or too thin, disappears against your face. And if it's thin and scraggly it enforces the impression that your baldness is due to a lack of rogaine instead of personal initiative.
So, make sure your head's all one color, and that you have some nice, dark facial growth, and most white guys can go bald with pride....that is unless you have a peanut-shaped head...in which case you're just screwed and that's that.
Now, why do we care?
Well, the answer with why men care about virtually anything always comes back to one thing: Women.
For some reason we believe that women don't find balding men very attractive. Now that may be true if you have a receding hairline or a big bald spot in the middle of your head. But if you go all the way bald and follow the above tips you look a bit edgy and dangerous...or at least brave and willing to do your own thing.
Women, universally, have accepted bald black men as a societal staple. There are some women who will even preface their description of a handsome black man as requiring that he be bald as part of the enticement.
We've had Isaac Hayes working for us since the 70s, and that's a powerful force, despite his Scientology ties. Who have white guys had in their corner for bald style? Telly Savalis. Sometimes he was cool, other times he looked like Dr. Evil with a lollypop. So you've got some catching up to do.
In the end though, it's about virility. Most of what we find attractive, even when we don't know it, is directly tied to how good a breeder that other person seems to be.
Healthy hair indicates a healthy body which could mean healthy genes.
Ironically, on a cultural level, big bald guys also give a symbol of virility, but more in the "raid your village, take the women and ravage them" sort of way. However, if you're somewhere in between, with just a bald, fading spot, then you look more like Friar Tuck, which screams celibacy....

Who Am I?

2006-02-26T08:54:00.000-05:00

Who am I? In essence, that is what this blog is all about. Sometimes I think I know, but sometimes I'm sure I don't. Lots of other people think they know. They are pretty much uniformly wrong.
Labels? I've got lots of those. I'm an african-american, 30-something, gorean-styled dominant lifestyle Master, left-leaning moderate, gamer geek writer. Wrap your brain around that all at once. You might know me as El Magico, Dark Lord, DLDC, Rivin, A2knight or, if we go wayyy back, Lord Bane.
But does that really tell somebody, including yourself, who you are? I don't think so.
I'm not even sure this will.
This blog will be my net-borne stream of consciousness, my electronic catharsis. Sometimes it will be political, other times it will be geek stuff, at others it will be social. There are times when any one can read it, but I warn you it isn't likely to be kid-friendly. This will be me uncensored, as probably nobody, including myself, has really seen before.
I hope you find the trip interesting.